


I'll Give You My Heart  (Zouis)

by zauthor



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, Minor Violence, Younger Zayn, highschoolAU, larry enemies, zarry brother
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-09
Updated: 2016-06-26
Packaged: 2018-05-05 20:14:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 34
Words: 73,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5388797
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zauthor/pseuds/zauthor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>" What's in it for me?" He asked, mocking seriousness. Louis raised one of his eyebrows at him.</p><p>"What?" He chuckled pulling him closer again but Zayn turned his head to the other side.</p><p>" What will I get if I agree?" He tucked his lower lips under his teeth. Louis' eyes sparkled with emotions.</p><p>" I'll give you my heart." He stated before closing the gap between them and this time, Zayn let him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ۰

Harry was not a fool.

Actually, he was a very smart boy. All his teachers always appreciated him and his mum thought so.He also got that A- in that science report once.So, he was considerably a smart boy.Well, not as smart as Zayn but then nobody could be as smart as Zayn. The little boy was a genius.

Anyways, Harry was not a fool. So, he knew something was awfully wrong when his mother had come up to his room that night.

Let's start from the beginning shall we.

When to harry was fifteen, as a result of an unpleasant trip to the kitchen, he found out that his father had a severe drinking problem. Des Styles was not exactly the best father you could ask for but still he passed as a decent one.Unfortunately, that year his business had to face a major loss and so things were hard on them.For Des, it meant turning into a clueless, harsh alcoholic.At first, it was just him stumbling late at night and yelling out a few profanities here and there.But after one fateful night, there was a lot of yelling and it was like a loud crackling storm had broken out on the ground floor of their little two story house.

Harry and his younger brother, Zayn, who was merely thirteen at the time, would stay up late every night listening to their parents yell at each other.They would just lay in their own rooms until the yelling got too much for young Zayn. When it felt like hell was gonna break loose downstairs, Zayn would finally give up his brave act.He'd walk up to the room across from his own and silently creep into his brother's embrace.Harry would always keep the door open, for he knew they'd need each other.Both the brothers would cuddle up to each other until the yelling stopped and it was better.Then they'd just hold onto each other as if their lives depended on it.They didn't need words to communicate they had their own language, and they could tell each other how much they needed the other just by holding on.

Days turned to weeks, weeks to months and soon two years had passed like that.The brothers holding onto the only hope left and their parents yelling at the top of their lungs just down the stairs.It had gotten to the point where Zayn stopped sleeping in his own room. In fact, he opted to stay in his older brother's room at all times.Harry was more than okay with that, the curly haired lad felt safer when Zayn was around anyway.So, that he was at arms length if anything were to happen.He felt he could protect him better that way.Harry was seventeen and Zayn was fifteen.

Everything was exactly the same like it was when it all started two years back.Except that now, there were some nights when there was no yelling or screaming.Believe it or not, those were the nights that scared Harry the most.The yelling was more familiar now, like a routine process but the silence.The silence was something they weren't used to and Hence, it was frightening for them.These nights they would stay awake the entire night, waiting for something to happen, anything to happen.They waited as anticipation bubbled itself in their stomachs and made it hard for them to breathe.It's like when you know there's a bug in your room somewhere but you don't know where it is and you can't see it, even though its still in the room.Exactly like that, only much worse.

Now if they were lucky, at some point the yelling would start and they'd be able to breathe again.But they weren't usually that lucky, and had to stay up the entire night waiting for something to happen, anything to happen.Until, exhaustion caught up with them and they passed out.

Naturally, it was one of those nights when it happened.

Harry was already sitting up in his bed, almost curious as to what his mother had to say to them. Zayn was laying right beside him.He knew his little brother was scared.He had his little hands covering his face entirely.His knees were brought up to his chest and it seemed like if he could, Zayn would fold into himself until nobody could see him.Harry carded his fingers through the black hair, trying to ease his brother from the position.Almost as if he was trying to get him ready for what was to come.He was so endorsed in calming his brother that he did not see his mother, who was already in the room standing almost beside him.

"Harry?"It came out a bit like a question.

Harry's head jerked up to look at what he assumed was his mother's figure.It was too dark to tell, though.He saw as she reached to turn on the lights. Hurriedly, he covered Zayn's eyes with both his hands.The latter squeaking at his older brother's actions.The light turned on and Zayn stopped squirming as he understood the point of his brothers actions, as bright light attacked their eyes.

"Zayn, baby what are you doing here?"Their mother was now sat at the foot of their bed.Harry removed his hands from his brother's eyes, both of them shared a look.

"'S dark."Zayn shrugged slightly.Harry knew his mother did not buy it, her eyes told him that.But for some reason, she let it go.He just assumed that she realized, they weren't exactly deaf.

She rubbed her hands on her jeans, before heaving a sigh and starting.

"So, you must know that things aren't exactly good for me and your father."She smiled.Harry looked at her green eyes which were shining with a hidden emotion.

"So.. We've decided to get a divorce."He wanted to be relieved but for some reason, he had a feeling that it wasn't the end of the conversation.He looked as his mother looked back and forth between Zayn and him.Something about her was not right, maybe it was something in her posture or her aura but something was definitely wrong. Even though, Harry couldn't exactly point it out.Well, not until a few minutes later.

"Like, you know in a divorce......everything has to be divided and so...so"Her voice cracked and a series of tears started flowing down her cheeks, one after another.

"So, what Mom?"Harry was getting scared and it was quite evident in his voice.He saw as Zayn reached over to their mother and wiped her tears with his thumb.

"It's okay mom.We don't want to know.You can tell us some other time."And those words of Zayn were all it took for her to collapse completely.Her resolve broke and she broke down into hysterics.Harry reached over to his mother, placing a soft kiss on her forehead.

"No!No! I have to tell you.I have to tell you now!"She gasped through another sob.Harry looked at her, as she held onto Zayn and struggled to get words out of her mouth.

"We have to separate you two, one of you have to go with him to Cheshire."And the cat was out.It was like someone had dropped a bucketful of ice cold water onto Harry's head.He couldn't help but feel tears prick at the back of his eyes.

"No!No!"Harry jumped over to where Zayn was, taking him away from his mother and into his lap.His mother looked shocked, it was like someone had slapped her right across her face.

"But it's fine, We just have to get a lawyer who would prove that your father is not a suitable man for Zayn's guardianship and we'll be back together in no time,"If things were bad for Harry, they just got a hundred times worse now.

He looked as tears started leaking out of Zayn's eyes and his heart was shredded into pieces.

"No!You can't give Zayn to him!Zayn will not go!Zayn can't go!He doesn't deserve this!"Harry was out of control, yelling at his mother at the top of his lungs.His mind had gone all fuzzy and all he could comprehend was that Zayn would have to go.He couldn't even decipher, what he was saying.It was all a bit of a blur for him.

He yelled, until his mother left the room crying and then hugged the crying little boy who, he could tell, was scared out of his wits.It was such a shock to Harry's body that for a long time all he could say was

"Not gonna let you go."

And he said that again and again until Zayn had stopped hiccuping and soon his breathing had evened out, signalling that the younger lad was asleep.Even after that Harry could only hold onto his brother, and this time, he was literally holding onto him as his only hope.

He was smart after all.

+

Almost two weeks later, Zayn was being snatched out of Harry's grasp, as their father manhandled him into the car.Harry was being held by Anne as he thrashed and struggled in her grasp to get lose.He saw Zayn sobbing from the window of the car, as it started moving away.He screamed as Zayn mouthed an 'I love you' to him.And he felt the pain as his legs ached terribly, when he ran after the car for a long time, he didn't stop until his legs gave up and he curled up in the middle of the street sobbing hysterically into his shoulders.He laid there until it was really dark and his friends came to haul him up to his feet and get back to his house.That day something snapped inside of Harry.He could bear with his parents fighting, his father yelling, his mother is not giving a shit but he couldn't deal with Zayn not being there.

Zayn was his constant star and he'd do anything to get him back.

Edited. 02/02/2016.

Preach.Comment.Vote.Leave feedback.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't forget to tell me,what you thought about it!


	2. ۱

7

6

Zayn laid straight from across the clock in his little room.

5

4

The raven haired lad counted seconds as the clock ticked by.

3

2

1

A tear slipped out from his eye, but he was fast to wipe it off from the back of his hand.

"Happy Birthday Harry."A small smile appeared on his face as he whispered those words to no one but himself.

It had almost been a year since Zayn had last seen his older brother, even longer with his mum. Zayn was not even allowed to attend his own court guardianship matters. There had been three hearings since the day he left and he attended only one of them. After that, his father had gotten a warrant against his mother and Harry meeting him. Apparently they were harmful to Zayn's upbringing and so they were ordered to stay twenty feet away from Zayn at all times.

Zayn couldn't be that sure but he thinks it's the consequences of that one time Harry snuck him out from the courtroom(i.e the only time he was in a courtroom)and they spent the day together visiting the city and swapping some stories here and there. That was the most happiest Zayn had been in the past year. He couldn't stop smiling and he could clearly see that Harry couldn't either. Both the brothers were happy and of course, it couldn't last forever.

So when their father had found them, it wasn't much of a surprise but it was something that they wish wouldn't happen but at the same time, they knew it was going to. He grabbed Zayn by his collar and dragged him to the car, throwing him inside. Whilst, Harry yelled at him and screamed for him to let Zayn go, and how much of a horrible father he was. Their father was furious and the bruises on Zayn's arms could testify that. He watched as he pushed Harry away from the car and yelled for him to stay away. Then he got into the car and they were moving. He saw Harry get up and he waved at him and this time, Harry waved back at him. The curly haired lad looked truly helpless.

Zayn didn't cry that day, maybe because he had already accepted that they were gonna have to live like this. Maybe because he knew that moments like those would be the only time he'd be with his brother and he only wanted to remember the happy details about it.So he didn't cry.

That was the last time he'd seen Harry and it was enough for him to last a year. Whenever he'd get tired, sick, sad or scared he'd sit and think about that day. Sometimes he imagined it a bit differently, where their father doesn't come and he goes back home with Harry. His mum is happy to see him and she hugs him for an eternity. Then they have a warm dinner, Before he and Harry head to bed.He wishes it could be different. And sometimes he imagines that he could fix it. That he could build a time machine and go back in time where everything was alright. Maybe he could talk some sense into his dad whilst he was still happy and most importantly sober. And Maybe he would be able to fix everything for everyone.

It was the first time that Harry wasn't with Zayn for his birthday and to say Zayn missed him would be an understatement. He felt like he could see him, those green eyes of his glinting with happiness and a huge smile plastered on his face. Almost like he could hear him laughing and talking to him.

A huge smile made itself evident on Zayn's face. He could still feel the tears stinging at the corners of his eyes, begging to be let out. But he wouldn't cry it was Harry's eighteenth birthday and he was gonna celebrate his own way. By remembering him. Memories swarmed his mind and he was lost in a world he wished were real.

He could remember the first time he went to school. Zayn had started crying the moment he realized they were going to separate him and Harry. He clutched onto the curly haired lads jeans and tried to follow him as he left Zayn's classroom. He remembered Harry telling him that it was just for some time and he'd come to get him in no time. And as promised Harry was there to get him as soon as the last bell rang. Zayn remembered thinking how hard it was for him to be without Harry. Little did he know he'd have to be miles away from him.

He could remember that one time an older boy had tried to tease Zayn about his long hair and Harry tried to beat him up even though the boy was almost twice as big as Harry. He remembers Harry shoving his umbrella into the older boys groins and telling Zayn to run as fast as he can. Zayn remembers both the brothers running until they were gasping for breath and then bursting out laughing at the look on the old boys face when he was hit in the groins.

A few tears free themselves from the barricades and this time, Zayn didn't bother to wipe them. The memories came and went. He was so absorbed in them that he didn't even heard the cacophony just outside his window. It wasn't until he heard the knock on the window that he was alerted to someone's presence.

For a minute there Zayn thought he was hallucinating. Because he could see the curls and he was almost certain that it was Harry who was standing outside his window. He opened the window and he was greeted with the sight of his brother dangling while trying to balance himself on something.

"Don't drop me!You blonde idiot!" Harry yelled out to someone beneath him.

"You know what Harry? You're bloody heavy!" Zayn tried to look beneath Harry to see who was grumbling. What he saw was merely a shadow of a person, it was very dark.

"Hi, Zaynie!Now that you've opened your window will you please help me in." Harry said to Zayn, who was still a bit too shocked to process what was happening. He shook himself out of his trance and helped Harry inside his room.

"Oh thank god!Now pull me up!" The same voice yelled from outside. Harry looked back down and shook his head.

"Yeah, Niall!Maybe you should stay there!Guard." Harry shouted to, apparently Niall.

"Yeah mate! I'm just gonna stay here and freeze to death after driving for 2 fucking hours!It's fine." Niall let out clearly exasperated. Zayn looked at him through the window as he pulled at his hair.

"Thanks, bro I knew you'd get it!" Harry said as Niall shook his head and sat down on the ground making himself comfortable.

"That's my best friend Niall!Remember him?" Harry turned to look at Zayn. Zayn shook his head lightly and then leapt into his brother's embrace. Harry tightened his arms around Zayn as the tears started appearing in his eyes. Zayn felt himself shaking and he knew he was crying. But it was fine Harry was here.

"Hey, Hey it's fine.I'm here now."Harry rubbed soothing circles on the small of Zayn's back. Zayn pulled back and wiped away his tears with his shirtsleeves. He smiled at Harry.

"Happy Birthday Harry."He let out while suppressing the bubbling sobs in his throat. Harry smiled at him placing a soft kiss on his forehead.

"How are you?"Harry carded his hands in Zayn's now long black hair. Zayn smiled at him again.

"I'm fine, You are here," He said quietly.Harry gave him a knowing look.

"Oh, I almost forgot."Zayn saw as Harry got out a little cardboard box from out of his jacket pocket.

"Let's celebrate our birthday."Zayn could see Harry's eyes clearly in the little light of his room.They were dancing with emotions.

Back at Bradford, they use to celebrate their birthdays on the same date. Approximately the same distance from Harry's birthday and after Zayn's birthday. They'd have this huge party and call out all their relatives and friends. Harry would have his entire class while Zayn called out a few friends. Anyways they'd have a lot of fun and on their real birthdays, they'd do a little celebration just with their parents. That was until things got bad. After that, it was just Zayn and Harry celebrating in their own way. And this was it.

"Come on."Harry led Zayn to his little bed. He sat down across from him, putting the box between them. Zayn opened the box and was greeted by the sight of a chocolate cupcake. In the middle of the cupcake, there was an H and Z piped with white icing.

"I made it myself this time." Harry placed a candle on the cupcake and lit it with a match. Zayn watched his brother trying to memorize his features before he had to go. He didn't know when he was going to see him again.

"Come on Zaynie make a wish!"Harry looked at him hopefully.

Zayn closed his eyes and wished. He wished that he could stay just like that and everything could be better like it was.

He opened his eyes and saw Harry clutching his hands together and whispering feverishly. An involuntary laugh escaped his lips, alerting Harry who shook his head at him and continued his wishing session. Zayn chuckled and then place a finger on his lips shushing himself. That made Harry laugh but still he pretended he didn't laugh and started whispering again. Zayn looked fondly at his older brother, as he nodded his head signaling the end of the wish and they both blew the candle. Then Harry picked up the cupcake feeding it to Zayn before handing it to him. But instead of feeding the cupcake to Harry, Zayn smashed it to Harry's nose. Harry closed his eyes and sighed heavily before wiping the cupcake from his face and collecting it all in his hand.

Zayn saw as Harry's expression changed into a mischievous one and he knew exactly what he was about to do.

"No!" Zayn jumped up from the bed and started running as Harry started following him around the small room. Little giggles and squeals resonated throughout the house. Zayn was so engrossed in getting away from Harry that he didn't hear the voice shouting from outside the window.

"Harry!I think he's back!He's definitely back!Oh My God!Harry!" Zayn heard Niall yell, as Harry stopped chasing him and they were frozen to their places.

A cold tremor passed through Zayn's back. He heard him before he saw him.

"Zayn!You bloody nuisance, what are you doing up there?" Zayn looked at Harry with a horrified expression as he heard the footsteps nearing his bedroom. None of the boys moved from their places

The door opened revealing their father. He was in the same state that Zayn saw him every night. Drunk out of his mind and hopeless.

"You!What are you doing here?" Zayn leapt in front of Harry as he saw his father approach the older lad.

"He's just going,Dad." his voice came out high-pitched. His dad gave him a disgusted look before grabbing him by his shoulder and pushing him away.

"What do you think you're doing, you little brat?"Harry rushed towards Zayn's side and quickly hauled him up to his feet, standing in front of him.

"Why did you do that?" He yelled at his father.

"Cause I am his father, I'll do whatever I please with him. As for you, go away before I call the police. Go away to your dumb mother and stay away from the mutt." He slurred before pushing Harry to the side. Zayn yelped as his father grabbed him by the hair and dragged him out of the room.

"I told you to stay away from him!I told you what I'd do if I see you with him or that bitch of a mother of yours." His father spat as he pushed him down the stairs. Zayn tried to grabbed the railing as he slipped on the discarded beer bottle on the stair but he was too late. He tried to break his fall with his hands but as he heard the cracking sound, he knew that wasn't such a good idea after all. A sharp pain erupted throughout his body and he heard an inhuman shriek leaving his lips.

"Zayn!" He heard Harry's scream before his body shut down and the imminent darkness welcomed him with open arms.

+

Edited

Preach.Vote.Read

Sara.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Preach.read.comment.kudos.


	3. ۲

"It's all my fault.I'm so sorry baby, so sorry." Harry watched as his mother broke into yet another series of endless sobs. He saw as she cradled Zayn's hand to her face and kissed it softly.

He couldn't get the incident out of his head. It replayed itself in his mind like a terrible nightmare, only it was real this time. Zayn's bandaged form laying in a hospital bed attached to numerous tubes was a painful reminder of what had happened.

Harry couldn't recall a time he had felt more powerless than he did in those few seconds. He watched as Zayn slipped on the disastrous bottle and then tumbled down the stairs like a ragdoll. He heard the gut wrenching scream leaving his mouth before he laid limp on the ground.

Harry couldn't do anything but watch the scene unfold itself in front of his eyes. He felt a scream of his own leaving his body before everything turned into a messy blur. His body was in overdrive. It was like he was on some superhuman drugs and everything was whipping past him. Dread coursed through his body as he saw blood pooling around Zayn's small frame. He yelled for help and tried inspecting his brothers state. But his attempts were futile as he couldn't stop the shaking in his hands. Every time he tried to check Zayn's pulse, a cold tremor would pass his body and he'd want to scream at the top of his lungs.

At some point, He saw a flash of blond right across from him.It was Niall. Harry could tell he was talking to him but he couldn't hear what he was saying. He could see the panic and urgency in the blonde's actions but he couldn't feel anything himself. Anything but the overwhelming sense of fear.

He saw as Niall waved a hand right in front of his face, before sighing heavily. He wanted to help him, to help Zayn, to do anything but he was helpless.

It wasn't until he heard the sound of the degrading laughter, that Harry was back in his body. He felt a rush of anger and hatred coarse through him, as he made his way back upstairs where his father was standing. He looked at his father's smug expression and that was it. He couldn't account for his actions after that. It was like he was watching himself from outside of his body as he landed punch after punch to his fathers cowering form. He wanted to go check on Zayn but his body had a mind of its own. Anger overpowered all of his senses and he couldn't stop even if he wanted to. All his bottled up anger and hatred came upon his father in the form of punches and kicks until he was black and blue.

"Stop Harry!" Harry had looked at his father's crouching form on the ground. A powerful surge of hatred crossed his body as he gave a final kick to his already huddled up figure. He saw as his father's body shuddered in fear and it gave Harry a sick feeling of satisfaction.

He wanted his father to feel what they felt all those years. He wanted him to be frightened, to feel pain and most importantly to feel betrayed. He was Harry's father after all. Harry felt betrayed when he decided to be a grim monster and broke his family apart. It was only fair if his father felt the same.

"The paramedics are here, Harry!Come on!" He gave his father a final look before turning towards his best friend. It was the first time, Harry had responded to his best friend's plea, that night.

To say that Niall was a wreck, wouldn't be that wrong. His previously styled blonde hair was a disheveled mess, his blue eyes shining bright with panic and fear was clearly evident on his face. His white shirt was stained red with what Harry assumed was Zayn's blood.

Harry followed his friend to where Zayn was being laid on a gurney. He felt fear bubbling in the pit of his stomach, as he saw the paramedics attaching different tubes to Zayn's unconscious form. He wanted to ask if he was fine or what was wrong with him, But he was too scared that he might not like the answer to that.

"He's fine.They said he might've broken his arm, but he's gonna be fine." Harry jerked his head towards Niall. He had a reassuring look on his face as he patted Harry lightly on the back. In that moment, Harry felt grateful that Niall was with him during all of the chaos. He knew he wouldn't have been able to tackle the situation himself. In fact, he would've failed miserably. If it weren't for Niall, Harry couldn't even imagine what would've happened.

Even later that night, Niall was the one who dragged him to the hospital, who explained to the doctors what had happened, who called Harry's mother and faced her when she came. He waited alongside Harry in the waiting room and consoled his mother when she cried about her baby. He talked to the police officer and explained to him what he had witnessed. He even talked to the child protective services who were called by the police when they analysed the situation. All in all, Niall was the only one keeping the ship afloat, when everyone was scared of the storm that was upon them. He was the one keeping them from drowning even in the most horrible circumstances. Niall was a saviour and Harry was forever indebted to him.

"Harry?" He looked up at his mother who was sitting beside Zayn's bed. Her eyes were wet and dark circles surrounded them. She looked exhausted.

"Come on." She waved him over to his brothers side. Harry looked at the small form of his younger brother. Zayn had always been a small lad for his age but attached to all those tubes he looked even smaller. He looked fragile and easily breakable. Harry didn't like that, He didn't like any of it.

He blinked a few tears as he made his way towards the hospital bed. He stroked the huge cast on Zayn's arm softly. Harry felt like a huge failure in that moment. Like all those years when he tried to shield Zayn from the world were pointless. He felt like he couldn't accomplish his only mission. He couldn't protect Zayn.He felt purposeless.

"It's fine Harry, It's gonna be fine." Her voice came out coarse but firm.

"I hate him."Harry voiced his thoughts, caressing Zayn's face softly.

"I know."She let out quietly. Harry turned to look at her, a questioning expression on his face.

"You know!That's it!" Harry looked as his mother heaved a sigh and opened her mouth to speak.

"No!You don't get, to say anything! That monster pushed Zayn off the bloody stairs! and I only know that because I was around to witness it!God knows what else he must've done to him!" Harry saw as his mother started tearing up.

"Harry.." She tried but he shook his head adamantly. He wasn't ready to listen to whatever she had to say.

"You know what?You aren't any better than him!You were just so eager to get that divorce, to get rid of that bastard, that you didn't think of Zayn once!You didn't think how it'd effect him!You were Selfish, mum!and you have to admit it!"Harry yelled.

"You know how much I tried, Harry!You know how many times I've tried to get him back from your father!you were there all along!" Harry shook his head at her words.

"Yeah whilst Zayn was sacrificing himself for our sake!"He scoffed.

"You know that night when you came to tell us, Zayn wasn't in my room because it was dark.He was there because he was afraid of the consequences of his bloody parents fighting all the freaking time." A wet chuckle left his lips."It isn't like that made it any better."He let out defeated. Tears were now freely falling from his eyes.

"Oh Harry, I'm so sorry."His mother was crying. Her face was flustered and it felt like she was struggling to form her words. Harry let out a sob.

"You weren't there mom!You don't know what happened.He just...He just..."Harry couldn't complete the sentences even if he wanted to. He felt his mother's arm around him and that was all it took for him to collapse entirely.

The lump in his throat kept growing until he wanted to scream out in pain. It felt like there was a hole where his heart was supposed to be and it was swallowing him inside out. Hot tears streamed down his face and he wailed as his mother tried to calm him down. He was inconsolable. His body was tired and he just wanted it to be over and for everything to be better again.

+

Edited. 

Vote.Preach.Leave Feedback.

Sara.


	4. ۳

Zayn woke up to see his older brother sitting beside him. For a moment, he was confused but then he was greeted with the memories of the previous day.  
" Hey, Zaynie," Harry's voice came out hoarse and slow. His eyes were bloodshot, and tear tracks were still evident on his face. It wasn't hard to tell that Harry had been crying. Zayn felt an involuntary rush of worry cross him.  
"How are you?" Harry sniffled, quickly wiping his cheeks. Zayn tried to reach his brother, but he felt a tremendous weight on his arm. He frowned as he looked at the huge cast draped across his right arm.  
"Yeah, It's broken. Don't move it too much." He watched as Harry traced a few circles on the cast. Zayn felt an overwhelming feeling of fondness tightening in his chest as Harry took his tiny hand in his own and started tracing the lines on it.  
"Hazz." Zayn croaked out. Harry's green eyes flicked between Zayn's face and the cast. Zayn knew what Harry was doing; he was trying to avoid the situation. Whenever Harry felt uncomfortable about a situation he would just try to avoid it. Pretend like it never happened, so he never had to talk about it. Zayn understood what Harry felt.  
Harry looked at Zayn, and a small smile appeared on his face. He shook his head lightly before heaving a sigh.  
"So you have a dislocated rib, and you lost a lot of blood and, of course, your arm is broken." Harry chuckled awkwardly. " The doctor prescribed you a lot of medicines and mum is getting them right now. Anyways, He said that your vitals looked fine, and you are gonna be able to go home today and so that's good." Harry babbled, nodding his head excessively.  
"Home?"Zayn couldn't help but let out a sharp gasp at that. A vision of his father, standing on the stairs as he tumbled down haunted his mind. He felt his heart drop and his breathing quicken.  
"Zaynie, hey. Home with me. Not to that monster, that isn't home. That was never home. Hmm?" Harry's warm hand cupped his face. His green eyes were imperative, urging Zayn to believe his words.  
"Yeah, and after the great beating, our Harold here, gave him. I don't think he's gonna be able to move anytime soon." Zayn's ears perked up at the third voice in the room. He saw as the blonde guy approached him and Harry. He handed Harry a bag of chips and then turned to look at Zayn.  
"Hi, I am Niall.How are you, now." Zayn saw as his blue eyes softened with concern. He nodded his head reassuringly before letting out a small.  
"Beating?" Harry shrugged nonchalantly.  
"He deserved it." He let out simply. Zayn gave Niall a once over and a thoughtful expression came on his face.  
"You're wearing scrubs?" Niall looked down at his clothes and then at Zayn. An awkward smile appeared on hi face.  
"'S a long story." He scratched at the back of his neck awkwardly. " Anyways, I should probably call my mum. She's gonna kill me." He turned back on his heel and walked towards the door. " Oh and get well soon Zayn." He smiled sincerely at Zayn, before going out of the room.  
" Speaking of mums, ours is gonna be here in a... " Harry looked at his watch, apparently analyzing the time. " In approximately few minutes so yeah."He looked up at Zayn and smirked. " She's gonna cuddle you to death, and probably cry a lot. " He nodded his head thoughtfully. "So be aware."  
Zayn let out a few chuckles at that. He watched as all the remnants of sadness left Harry's face and His green eyes glinted in happiness.  
Zayn was okay.  
+  
" Dude, why'd you eat the meatball? I was gonna eat the meatball!" Harry pushed his fork in the bowl between them.  
"Alright! Alright! You can have it too." Niall raised his hands, signaling he meant no harm.  
"What do you mean, I can have it too? It's mine." Harry looked at him flabbergasted.  
"And why the hell is that? It's not fair!" Niall shook his head jumping a bit in the process.  
"Okay. You can have it too!" Harry smacked the other boy in the head.  
"Dude! Why'd you do that?" Niall rubbed his head slightly.  
"Maybe you guys could get different plates and not share?" Zayn said innocently, as he watched the two best friends quarrelling for food.  
Both of the lads stopped their fight and turned towards Zayn. They gave him an absurd look, before continuing their "sharing".  
"Don't even try. They are hopeless." Zayn heard his mother before he saw her. She had a huge smile on her face. Zayn tried to take the soup from her hands, but she simply shook her head and sat right beside him. She blew on the spoon before bringing it near his mouth.  
"Open up." She said sternly, and Zayn obeyed her. She fed him the entire bowl of soup before giving him his meds.  
"Come on lads, let's finish this up quickly now. Zayn needs rest. Come on! Out now." She ordered. Harry and Niall got up quickly and moved their fight to the kitchen. Once they were gone, she kissed Zayn on the forehead before tucking him in.  
"Harry'll be here after Niall goes. Okay, bub?" Zayn nodded at her reassurances before closing his eyes. The meds must work miracles because he was out just like that.  
Unfortunately, they wore off far more quickly than he'd want them to.  
When Zayn woke up, he felt abnormally hot. By the light in his room, he could tell it was quite early in the morning.  
He was in the process of getting out of his bed when it happened. His heart stopped for a minute as he saw a dark figure standing right beside his window. A scream bubbled itself in his throat, but he was to scared to let it out. He wanted to wake up Harry, or call for help but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't even move.  
Unfortunately, for him, the thief had spotted him. Zayn could feel the panic gnawing at his insides. But what happened next wasn't exactly what he expected.  
He was startled by a high-pitched scream.  
"Oh, My God! You scared the shit out of me!" Zayn was confused. He saw as the thief clutched his knees and gasped for air. What the hell was happening?  
"What are you doing here?" Zayn frowned as he heard the shrill voice again. He gave him a questioning look.  
"I live here. What are 'you' doing here?" Zayn had finally found his voice. He saw as the thief straightened out his clothes, tilting his head a bit.  
"But I haven't seen you here?" His cerulean eyes were laced with curiosity. Zayn felt a bit offended at his question but then again, he just moved back. So some part of him expected people not to know him. Still Zayn didn't answer his question.  
"How are 'you' related to 'him'?" Zayn looked back at where the thief pointed. He was greeted by a completely knocked out Harry. His mouth was slightly ajar as he snored loudly. Zayn felt a rush of protectiveness. He looked back at the thief, and his next words came firmer than he had intended.  
"He's my older brother." That caused the thief to burst out in laughter. Zayn was getting irritated with this strange person. Who was he to break into his house and then make fun of his brother. He had a scornful look on his face now.  
The thief looked at his expression, and his laughing ceased.  
"Oh, you're serious?" He had an incredulous expression on his face. Zayn merely nodded his face; the frown still present on his face.  
"Oh, In that case, my name is Louis Tomlinson and What time is it?" He looked at his phone. "And I am getting late! I suggest you don't use this washroom. Unless you want to have a mindfuck. Now we wouldn't want that to happen to a pretty boy like you, would we? and if you do decide to, its toilet paper rolls. And I'll be seeing you around." And with that, He jumped out of the window, leaving Zayn horribly perplexed.  
Zayn was confused as to who the strange man was and what had he done. Most importantly, who he was to Harry and why'd he dislike him so much. He decided he'd ask Harry when he gets up.  
Fortunately, He didn't have to wait that much.  
A disturbing sound resonated from Harry's phone. Now Zayn didn't expect Harry to get up like the dead and head towards the bathroom without even giving him a glance. He saw as Harry went into the washroom. A chill passed through his spine as he heard a very alarming scream. He got up involuntary heading up to the washroom.  
"What the fuck!!" A grim expression was painted on Harry's face. He was looking at the toilet with a stunned expression. Zayn looked at the toilet and saw the entirety of it covered in what awfully looked like poop. A few chuckle escaped his lips.  
"He said it was toilet paper rolls." Harry looked at him incredulously. He passed a hand through his hair before taking a towel and cleaning the toilet paper rolls from over the toilet. Zayn couldn't help but laugh at his brother's reaction.  
"Stupid twat!" Zayn clutched at his sides as they had started hurting him.  
"What are you doing up, anyway?"Harry tried to divert the conversation. Zayn headed back into the room and settled himself on the bed.  
"Well, I don't know my meds wore off. Don't you shut your window, Harry?" Harry came out of the bathroom and sat beside Zayn. He shook his head as he tried to fix the belt around Zayn's cast.  
"I do! But that bastard always finds a way to sneak in!" Zayn giggled at that. "What did he say?" Harry got up and started searching through his clothes.  
"He was strange. I thought he was a thief, at first, but then he was talking to me. I told him I was your brother, but he didn't seem to believe me. And then he said it was toilet paper rolls, and then he was gone." Zayn smartly omitted the part where Louis called him pretty because he could tell Harry wouldn't appreciate that.  
"His name is Louis, and he is a twat." Harry let out straightforward and dull. Zayn was curious now as to what was between the two lads. He wanted to know, but he didn't ask Harry. His concise answer had made it clear that he didn't want to talk about it.  
"Now here are your meds, take them and get some sleep, yeah?" Zayn nodded his head at his brother's question, before gulping down the pills with some water. He laid down and let Harry tuck him.  
"I'll be back soon,k?" Harry placed a soft kiss on his hair.  
This time when Zayn fell asleep, he had one thing on his mind.  
Louis said he was pretty.  
+  
Edited.  
26/03/16


	5. ۴

Honestly, It wasn't Zayn's fault.

The black haired lad was just extremely excited.

In his defense, he had just returned back home. So his feelings and excitement were entirely justified. In fact, from his perspective, it wasn't even that wrong. Harry just worried too much. So what if he forgot his meals a few times. He was just exceptionally preoccupied.

Okay maybe it was more than a few times, and he didn't even realize until he started feeling dizzy. As a matter of fact, even then it was Harry who figured out how he must not be eating. Now, Zayn loves Harry, and he loves how Harry knows everything he's going through. But right now, with a big ass spoon shoved in his mouth. He couldn't be so sure.

"Come on, Zaynie. Eat up." Zayn couldn't help but groan. He wanted to get off and run but the dumb island was too high for him. He was pretty sure that Harry had sat him on that thing for the same reason. Zayn felt like a little baby trapped in a high chair.

"Harry.." He whined. Harry shoved another spoonful of soup into his mouth.

"Stop kicking your feet! and Don't force me to call mum." He wiped Zayn's face with a cloth and filled another spoonful of soup.

Zayn swallowed the stupid soup in his mouth. He could swear he had eaten the entire thing three times now but whenever he looked in the bowl it was still full. Zayn knew he had had enough If Harry fed him another spoon he was surely going barf. He tried telling the older lad, but he wasn't have any of it. So,he did what he had to.

He clenched his teeth tightly and placed his left hand on his mouth.

"No Zaynie!" Harry put the spoon back in the bowl and tried prying Zayn's hand from his mouth. Zayn shook his head, purposefully.

"Come on now, Just a little more left." Harry tried to reason with him, but the younger lad was relentless. He kicked his legs and sprawled out on the table, to get away from his brother.

"Okay! Okay! Don't move too much; you're gonna hurt your ribs." Zayn stopped as Harry threw his arms in the air, indicating he meant no harm. He sat up and saw the curly haired lad as he started doing the dishes.

"But no more skipping meals, Okay?" Harry turned around a bit to look at his younger brother, concern bright on his face. Zayn could only pout at his brother's words.

"But I told you I forgot!" He did, but apparently Harry was deaf in this particular matter. Zayn sighed, heavily, as Harry continued with the dishes.

It wasn't like he was deliberately not eating. He was just so absorbed in being back home and all that he simply forgot to eat. He didn't get what was so wrong about that.

Now Zayn knows he needs to get his priorities straight but with only having a little amount of food for the entire last year of his life, he was used to not eating. How was it his fault, that his body didn't remind him to eat anymore. He didn't get it.

Still, Harry was sort of mad at him and he didn't like that at all. He saw as the curly haired lad settled the dishes in the dryer and started cleaning the shelves. He wasn't even looking at him anymore.

"I don't like this very much!" He tried crossing his arms, but of course that big-ass cast got between all of that. So it looked like he was cradling his cast, instead. Zayn could feel the tears stinging at the back of his eyes. He hated how much he cried these days. He hated how he was happy one second and completely miserable the other. He turned his head away from Harry.

"You can't forget about eating, bub. It's not healthy." Zayn looked at him again and saw that the worry in his eyes had softened to concern. Harry placed the cloth on the table and helped the smaller boy down. Zayn could see the genuine concern on his brothers face and suddenly he didn't feel so guilt-free.

"I'm sorry. I promise I'll eat." Zayn looped his skinny arms around his brother's body and laid his head on his chest. Harry was almost a feet taller than Zayn, and this wasn't the only time he was thankful for it.

"It's okay. I just get worried." Harry placed a soft kiss on his forehead and hugged him. Zayn smiled in his chest.

"Hey, Harry! I got the stuff. What do you say? Revenge tonight?" Harry broke apart from Zayn to look at the box in Niall's arms. Zayn following his actions.

"Are those?...." A hand clasped itself over Zayn's mouth.

"No, Zaynie! We don't even want the walls to know." Niall's voice was laced with menace.

"But what are you gonna do with these?" Zayn said, prying Niall's pale hand off of his face. He looked up at Harry and saw a malicious smirk on his face.

"Wait and watch Zaynie. You just wait and watch." Zayn felt himself shudder at the coldness of Harry's voice. He almost thought Harry would burst into an evil laughter like the villains in all those old movies.

"Somebody get the door!" Zayn was quick to move as he heard his mother yell from upstairs.

"Harry! open the door!" He quickened his pace further, as his mother's yelling got insistent.

"Harry!"And he was finally at the door. He opened the door to see an unknown lady standing there. She was wearing a royal blue dress and had a large file in her pale arms.

"Hi, are you Zayn?" Zayn frowned at her words. How did she know him?

"Yes, he is. Who are you?" Harry must have heard what she said. He got in front of Zayn and stood like a barrier between him and the lady, protectively.

"I am Caroline; I work for CPS, and I am here to investigate Zayn's case." The lady pointed at Zayn, who was looking at her from behind Harry. He felt a small hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, Its just a CPS worker. You okay with that?" He looked at his mother who was standing right behind him. She had an encouraging expression on her face. Zayn took a heavy breath and nodded.

"Come on." Zayn followed her into the living room slowly. His ribs were still a bit of a problem with him. He sat on the sofa across from the lady, between Harry and his mother.

"Zayn, I am Caroline, and I am taking your case. Can I ask you a few questions?" Zayn just nodded his head before looking down, anxiously.

"So, on the file it says that you were living with your father, right?" Zayn nodded again, this time with his head down. He felt a slight pat on his back and a bundle of nerves loosened in his stomach.

"Did your father used drugs?" She opened her notepad and waited for Zayn to answer.

"He did." Zayn could feel a sharp sensation of nervousness in his entire body.

"What kind?" Zayn shook his head.

"I don't know. I saw cocaine once, but I only know that because he was talking about it." He scratched at the back of his neck, awkwardly.

"What about alcohol?" She jotted down the points on her little notebook.

Zayn looked at Harry and his mother before answering.

"He was an alcoholic." He cleared his throat. Caroline stopped writing and looked at him for a good second. Zayn didn't like it. In fact, he didn't like any of it.

"Did he ever beat you, Zayn?" He heard the hint of concern in her voice. Zayn's mouth went dry, and suddenly he didn't want to talk anymore. He looked at his mother pleadingly.

"It's gonna be over soon. You're doing really good. Just keep going." She placed a kiss on his head. He looked back at the CPS lady, who was looking at him expectantly. A part of him, wanted to tell her to go mind her own business, or to at least stop nosing around in other people's life. But the rational part of him knew that she was just doing her job and this was necessary. However, it didn't mean it sucked any less.

"Yes. " came out a small voice. He lowered his head so he wouldn't have to see the lady's expressions. The last thing he needed was an unknown lady feeling sorry for him.

"Can I inspect your body?" His head jerked up at this, and he couldn't help but shake his head furiously.

"No, no, no, no." He could feel the panic shooting through his body.

"Didn't they do it already in the hospital?" Harry hugged him from his side. Zayn completely melted in his brothers embrace; he couldn't have loved Harry any more than he did at that moment.

The lady only nodded. " I'll have to check."

"Maybe we should do this later." Zayn felt a glimmer of hope in his heart as he heard his mother's words but it didn't last that long, and He felt his heart lower into his stomach as the lady shook her head.

"Just one question left now, Zayn did he ever touched you, inappropriately?" Zayn could practically feel himself turning white. He felt the familiar tug in his chest and suddenly breathing wasn't that easy for him. He felt as his chest constricted more and more with every breath.

"Okay that's it, he doesn't want to do this." Harry pulled the younger lad into his lap and hid his face in his chest. Zayn wished he could hide in his older brothers embrace forever. So that he wouldn't have to face the world. The world was too cold for Zayn, and he didn't quite liked the world anymore.

"Please let me finish this, it's in his interests. Zayn did he or someone else touched you inappropriately, while you were living with him?" Zayn wanted to say no. Every inch of his living was ready to yell out a no but he couldn't. He felt like this women could see through him and if he didn't told the truth, she'd know he was lying.

"This one time." Zayn struggled to take a full breath. "One of his friends. He..he" He blinked a few tears and sniffled. "He tried to touch me.." Zayn felt another rush of panic as the memories of the fateful event invaded his head.

"He was drunk and I don't even remember his face, but he had these big monstrous hands and he..." Zayn felt something creep under his skin as he remembered the man's hand on his body. "But I got away and.." He sniffled. " I hid in the attic.I don't remember seeing his face again." he let out a choked sob.

Zayn felt disgusted. To know something happened to you and to say it out loud in front of people is two very different things. It was like all that had happened to him had hit him in that moment and he just couldn't stop crying.

He felt as Harry rocked him back and forth. He wanted to yell and run away and do a lot of other things that were absurd. But most of all he wanted to disappear, he wanted to just not exist at that moment. Life was too hard for him at that moment.

"It isn't your fault," Harry whispered in his ear.

And it wasn't.  
+  
Edited.  
26/03/16


	6. ۵

Zayn didn't know what he was doing there.

He didn't want to be there; that's for sure. In fact, he didn't even get the point of him being there. He was just sitting in the car, apparently as a lookout. Which was pretty ridiculous to begin with, like come on. He had a huge cast on his arm, his ribs still hurt him when he moved too fast, he couldn't even drive, and he left his phone at home. So, what was he going to do if someone came? Yell? Yeah, considering he was a good two houses away from the actual sight, he wasn't so sure if that would work. He seriously couldn't figure out why he was there.

Or maybe he could, but he just didn't want to.

The talk with the CPS worker, a week ago, really took its toll on him. Everybody could see it. He wasn't eating again but this time, because he didn't felt like eating. It was Harry who'd have to feed him every single day and even then it was just a little. The dark circles under his eyes got more prominent, and his cheekbones got even sharper. He could see it himself, and being Zayn; it took a lot of convincing to get himself to believe that he was dropping. He was dropping fast. It's not like he wanted to be like that. In fact, he hated the state he was in.

He felt like he depended too much on everyone. Like a burden, almost. And he didn't like that; he didn't like being the burden. He didn't want everyone in his life to worry about him, constantly. Be on their toes, whenever they were around him. Or treating him as if he were made of glass.Even a single push and he'd fall and break.

Honestly, he just wanted it to be like the old times. When the worst thing that could happen was that his father would start yelling and not care about them or their feelings. He wouldn't have to think about stuff too much back then. It would be all in front of him, like a terrible but open book. He wouldn't have to relive the bad memories and convince himself that all of it was over now. That he wouldn't have to live through all of it ever again. But the mind is nothing, if not a colossal trickster. Zayn couldn't help but think that this was just a magnificent dream. And someday, reality was going to wallop him. And then everything would be that nightmare of the life he was used to now.

He knows it's foolish, but whenever the doorbell rang now, he was haunted by the possibility of his father returning to get him, to take him away with him, and this time for good. And there was that awful second, where he could almost picture the demon getting in through the door and doing more things to him than just a regular beating. Fortunately, it was gone before he could blink but the taste of fear remained pungent on his tongue.

He didn't want to pile up his problems on anyone. So, naturally, he didn't talk to anyone about it. Still, he knew he was not at a very right place. At points he would feel like, if there were a place where people could go to die, he'd be willing to grow out wings to get there. It might feel as if it's a bit over exaggerated, but Zayn was dying. He was dying because he was tired of existing. He didn't want to just exist anymore. He wanted to live. Wanted to live, without waking up every morning and willing himself to believe that it was a good day, and he was happy. To live, without worrying that everything was going to go wrong every second of every day. He couldn't do anything without thinking that it was not good enough anymore. He wrote, he felt doubtful. He read, he compared it to his own work and felt like crap. He drew, and it sucked. Because even if it was decent, it was never good enough. He was not good enough, period.

He didn't want to do anything. He just wanted to be able to breathe without repeating it in his head that 'He was all right. It was okay. Everything was fine. What didn't he had? What more did he want?' He was so unfortunate because he had everything, but he was still not happy.

Zayn was not an attention seeker. He didn't want to pile his problems on anyone. The last thing he wanted was for his family to be worried out him. They already treated him as if he were a ticking time bomb; he didn't want it to get any worse.

Zayn thought he was getting better.Ever since he returned home, he would wake up, and he wouldn't have to say it to himself. He'd be happy, and he'd stay happy. But ever since that lady visited him, It was bad.

Zayn was burned out. His once soft pink lips were dry, chapped and dull now. His mind was hazy, and he hadn't slept for almost four days. He was exhausted, to say the least. He was so tired; he could feel every part of his body sag with fatigue. He wanted to sleep. Actually, it was all he wanted to do but his mind wasn't ready to spare him just about yet. Every time, he tried to sleep his head would turn itself into a washing machine. Random thoughts would go in and out of his mind. No matter, how hard he tried they wouldn't stop and he'd end up an agitated mess.

So, he guessed that Harry wasn't so blind after all and knowing Harry; Zayn knew that this was his older brothers scheme to make him feel better. To take him out to his arch nemesis' house and to plan out the prank, while Zayn just sat in the car parked two houses away, supposedly as a lookout.

Well, at least, he tried.

Zayn had been sitting in the car for almost twenty minutes when he came.

"Hey! " Zayn was startled out of his little sleep paralysis. He rubbed his free hand over his face and blearily opened his eyes. Surprisingly, he didn't felt awkward or scared, when he saw the cerulean eyed lad standing beside his window. Louis was looking at him questioningly.

"Hi!" Zayn said monotonously. Louis settled his elbows on the window and tilted his head slightly.

"Zayn, right?" Zayn nodded, still a bit out of it. Louis reached inside to touch his cast.

"How'd you get that?" Louis traced the few signs on the cast. He traced the smiley that Niall made and a small smile of his own lighted upon his face.

"I don't know, Fell?" Louis laughed. Zayn felt a yawn escape his lips.

"Okay. So you said you're Harry's brother, right? What is it like living with that twat?" Louis looked up at Zayn, a smirk on his face.

"Not very easy right now." Zayn yawned again. Louis let out a chuckle.

"Yeah? I figured. So why were you? Like. Gone? You lived with them right?" Maybe it was because Zayn was extremely out of it, but he couldn't really decipher what Louis had asked. Only that it was a question.

"What's with all the question?" Zayn settled himself more towards his side so he could lay and see Louis properly. He saw as the smirk on his face changed into a genuine smile, and his blue eyes lit up.

"Okay. So, we could give up the questions game, and you could just tell me what your brother is up to." Even that didn't catch Zayn's attention. He yawned again, blinking his eyes wearily before waving Louis away.

"I am just the lookout. I don't know anything. In fact, no one knows anything, not even the walls...." Zayn blabbered away.

"You really are tired. Aren't you?" Zayn nodded lightly, before getting into a more comfortable position. Now, he couldn't be that sure, but there was definitely giggling. The soft kiss on his cheek, on the other hand, was probably a figment of his tired imagination.

"Bye Zayn." And he was finally asleep.

+

The next time he woke up, he was in his room.

"Oh God! it's gonna start in a few seconds, Harry!" He looked up to see Niall and Harry sitting on the bed beside him. Both their faces stuffed in the laptop. Zayn could see the anticipation blazing in their features, illuminated by the light of the laptop.

"What?" His voice came out weak, but it was enough to alert the other lads. Suddenly, he was being sandwiched between them, and the laptop was on his lap. There was a camera footage on the laptop screen. He could see the picture of an unfamiliar room. By the looks of it, It was a bedroom, and there was a figure laying on the bed.

Everything was quite normal and peaceful. For a moment, he almost didn't get what they were looking at until the creepy music started. Zayn didn't recognize the tune, but it was enough to make the goosebumps on his arms rise.

He saw as the figure got up, warily and started searching for the source of the sound. It had just stood up when suddenly loads of neon eyes started blinking in the dark. The figure was apparently startled as it jumped and an ear piercing scream left its mouth. Zayn felt a scream of his forming itself in his throat but before that his mouth was covered by a large hand.

He saw as the figure climbed off their bed and hurriedly turned on the lights.The feather brown hair, the blue eyes and most importantly the scream.It was Louis. Zayn could recognize the lad, anywhere.

Within seconds realization hit him. When he had seen the dolls he hadn't exactly known what they would do with them but now it was quite clear to him. 

"You guys are so cruel!" And that caused the other two to laugh. 

+  
Edited.   
26/03/16


	7. ۶

Zayn was scared.

He didn't want trouble. Not on his first day of school. In fact, not at all.

He had been sitting in the library when he realised that he was going to be late for lunch. He had promised Harry, that he'd meet him for lunch. Actually, that was one of the terms he had to agree to so that he could join the school. Zayn's sure if it was up to his mother and brother they would've kept him home for his entire life. So, when he told them that he was ready to go to school their terms and conditions were not much of a surprise for him. Although, that didn't mean it wasn't annoying. He had to agree that he would meet Harry every day for lunch and eat whatever the older lad gave him. Also, Harry'd pick him up every day at the end of school and they'd walk back together to the car. Also, If he felt scared, sick or remotely uncomfortable, he was to find Harry or the school nurse. Now, Zayn knows most of these are childish and almost irrational but he really wanted to get out of the house and he wasn't going to argue about it with his family. It was not like he stood a chance anyway.

So, he was heading towards the cafeteria when he kind of got lost. He was extremely annoyed at all the maze-like paths and at himself for not remembering where he came from. He was just about ready to give up and call Harry when he heard it.

There were two people in the janitors closet.

" But this isn't enough Florence! I need more of it!" The heavier voice had said. Zayn got closer to the door, still careful enough to stay at a safe distance.

"No, you pay,You get the coke! You don't, you choke!" It was most definitely a girl. Zayn frowned trying to decipher what the two were talking about.

" I know who you are! I'll tell the entire school!" The man threatened.  
" Yeah and maybe I'll tell the principal about it how there is a drug addict on the loose, and who exactly the drug addict is. Now, you and I both know who he's gonna believe. So, keep your mouth shut, scumbag!" Zayn flinched as he heard the shrill laugh. Unfortunately, he knocked the door slightly in the process.

" Who the fuck is there?" He felt his blood run cold and all of a sudden he was running. Running at full speed, away from the harms of danger. He heard the door open behind him and his heart stopped for a second. He didn't look back, he kept on running. His legs were killing him and his lungs were about to collapse but still he kept on running.

He was so scared that he didn't even realise when he crashed into another person.

" Hey!" He focused his eyes on looking at those cerulean eyes. Louis had an annoyed expression on his face. He had his arms around Zayn and that was the only thing that kept the younger lad from falling. Zayn felt his already fast heart beat pick up its pace. He was petrified that those horrible people were still after him. He clawed at Louis' arm and turned to look at his chasers. Once,he realised that there was no one behind him, he let out a breath he hadn't realised he was been holding.

" What happened?" Zayn looked back at Louis. The feathery-brown haired lad was looking behind him,a huge frown plastered to his forehead.

Zayn felt himself shrink to the floor, his heart rate was still a little too high.

" Hey! Zayn,are you okay?" He breathed out heavily, as he heard the concern thickening in Louis' voice. He passed a hand through his hair and cradled his cast.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He nodded at his own words.

"No, you are clearly not! What happened? Was somebody giving you trouble?" Louis leant down beside him. Zayn didn't know if it was the blue in those eyes or the concern in his voice but he just wanted to tell Louis what had happened. So, he did.

" Coke!" Or well he tried to. Louis frowned at him, clearly perplexed. Zayn shook his head trying to rephrase it in his head.

" There was a girl and a guy in the janitor's closet!" He shook his head again,this time, more furiously.He felt a blush creep up under his cheeks as a playful smirk lit up on Louis' face.

"I mean like they were.." He tried to continue but the older lad interrupted him.

" I get it, Zayn. You don't have to say it." He placed a hand on Zayn's back. The smirk still present on his face.

" No! She was selling coke!" There it was, he finally said it. Louis' smirk fell and a concerned expression came on his face.

" What? Are you sure?" Zayn nodded, fervently.

" Okay. We need to tell someone." Louis had a thoughtful look on his face.

" No! No! No! Harry'll never let me out of his sight ever again or maybe they'll get me out of the school! Oh shit! I have to get to the cafeteria!" Zayn blabbered on. The raven haired lad looked at his watch and realised he was already ten minutes late. He got up hastily, picked up his bag pack and started running towards the cafeteria. Until, he realized he didn't know where it was.

He looked back at where Louis was standing now. The cerulean eyed lad has a puzzled expression on his face.

" Take me to the cafeteria, please." Zayn scratched the back of his head, sheepishly. Louis' merely nodded before leading the way.

" So you know If you would've told me about the stupid prank it would've saved me a whole lot of embarrassment." Zayn felt himself giggle at that.

" Well, you knew something was up. Why didn't you check?" Louis' scrunched his eyebrows together and shook his head.

" Nah! Where'd be the fun in that,eh?" Zayn felt a tinge of curiosity sparked in his stomach.

" Why are you guys? Like why do you hate each other too much?" Zayn knows he shouldn't be that curious. After all, he was here because of the damned curiosity. If he had minded his own business and not stopped to listen to a creepy conversation, he would've gotten to the cafeteria ages ago. Not like he was complaining or anything.

" Well, we are here. I'll tell you someday, Zayn. When we won't meet in a completely weird situation. Someday." Louis opened the cafeteria door for Zayn before turning around to get out and closing the door behind him. Zayn pondered over Louis' words before he was disrupted.

" Zayn ,over here!" He looked over at Harry. He was sitting at the table right across from Zayn. The younger lad reached him slowly and handed his bag over to him. Harry took out the seat for Zayn and sat him down, before getting in the seat right next to him.

" Where were you?" Zayn felt various pairs of eyes on him. He lowered his head, anxiously fidgeting with his sweater.

" I got lost." He mumbled sheepishly.

" Aw, he is so cute. Harry,dude!" He heard a shrill voice.

" Right, Guys this is my younger brother Zayn." Zayn looked up at different faces as a chorus of hellos were exchanged.

"And Zayn these are my friends Oliver," Harry pointed to a guy with extremely curly hair and a blue-rimmed glasses placed on his nose.

" Niall. Oh, you've already met him." Niall grinned at him.

" Elijah." The one with dark hair and pale complexion. He had a calmer expression on his face.

" Sophia." A really cheerful looking red head.

" And Lori was supposed to be here but well. So, this is my crew." Zayn felt himself blush as everyone looked at him expectantly. He raised his free hand and waved at them shyly.

" Hi." He mumbled almost to himself causing almost everyone at the table to coo at his shyness.

" Now, that Sophia is satisfied. This is your sandwich, eat it!" Harry placed a simple chicken and mayo sandwich in front of him. Zayn felt repulsed at the mere sight of the sandwich. He looked at his older brother, pleadingly, but he was not having any of it.

" No, Zaynie. You promised!" Zayn groaned at his older brother's command. He unwrapped the sandwich and munched on the corner of it, slowly.

" So, Zayn? How old are you?" Elijah asked.

" 16." He shrugged.

" Aw, he is practically a baby." Sophia gushed.

Zayn felt his cheeks warming yet again. He was not a baby!

" He looks younger, though!" Oliver yelled. It almost felt as if he had been cheated with.

" Well, he is not!" Niall pushed him playfully.

" But I swear.." Still, Oliver was persistent.

" Come on, Olly. Leave him alone. How was your first day, Zayn?" Niall tried to divert the topic.

" It was okay. I got lost, though." Zayn carefully excluded the part where he was chased by the drug dealer because he couldn't bloody resist but eavesdrop on them.

" Where did you get lost?" Harry frowned at him.

" Well, he was lost. How'd he know? How'd you get here, though, Zayn?" Elijah asked him opening a pack of crisps.

" Louis helped me." It came out almost naturally.

Suddenly, everyone stopped what they were doing and the cheerful atmosphere dropped.

" Louis Tomlinson?" Zayn knew he was in trouble. Harry's voice was ice cold. He dropped his sandwich and tried reaching his brother.

" He was the only one in the hallway! He helped me! He was nice!" By the look in Harry's eyes, Zayn knew he was in deeper trouble now. Harry was furious, his nose was flaring and his eyes red with fury.

" You are going to stay away from him. Understand?" Zayn felt himself flinch at the harshness of Harry's words.

" Understand?!!" He whimpered and nodded his head feverishly at his brother's insistent command.

Zayn was scared but he knew he wouldn't be able to stay away from the cerulean eyed lad. He was just too curious. Now if that would turn out for the good or for the bad only time would tell.

+  
Edited  
6/11/16


	8. ۷

Zayn thought it was a fair day.

However, He didn't expect his first art class to be such a chaotic mess. Actually, he was hopeful and almost thrilled for the class. He even packed his favourite set of pencils and colour sets, that he kept for only certain occasions.

Art had always been Zayn's passion. He loved reading, writing and singing too but they were merely his hobbies. Art was so much more than a hobby. Ever since he was a little boy, Zayn knew he was different. He would prefer drawing the lads playing sports rather than joining the game himself. There was something about the colours that spoke to him. Something about the noise of the pencil striking against the crisp paper. Something about the smell of the paints as he mixed them onto the pallet. When Zayn was living with his father he used to long for art. To crave for the feeling of the paint brush between his fingers. The subtle strokes that lead to the precise form of emotions.   
His drawings were his words, his conversations. He couldn't ever express himself any better than that. He found hope and solace with every stroke of the brush, with every paint that he mixed, with every line that he traced. Art was home.

So, When he thought of his first art class he didn't assume it'd go the way it did. As soon as he entered the class he was ambushed.

" OMG! you are the new kid!" He took two steps back, so he wouldn't stumble onto the girl. Her blue eyes were shining with glee as she twirled a strand of her brown hair.

" He's here!" He looked as a swarm of overly cheerful girls gathered around him.

"Are you the new kid?" The same brunette asked him, the strand of hair still in her hand.

" Why did Harry let you sit with him?" Another one of the group asked. She was almost the same as the first one but with shorter hair. At least that's what Zayn thought, how'd he know? He wasn't interested in girls. They were all the same for him.

" Because.." Zayn tried to answer but he was interrupted yet again. This time by an evil looking blonde girl. She wasn't cheerful like the rest of them instead, she had an uninterested expression on her face and a fairly dull tone to her voice.

" You're his new bitch." Zayn grimaced at her statement. He shook his head, violently, completely grossed out by the idea of him and Harry in that sense.

" Whatever you think. You are and will be his new bitch. You'll never be his boyfriend!" Zayn blinked as she snapped her fingers in front of his face. He wanted to laugh at her. He couldn't help but relate her to Dahlia Royce from 'Suburgatory'. The girl was just too much like her. From her perfect blonde hair to her fake dull voice and the caked up face. Everything about her shouted Dahlia Royce.

" Stella don't!" The first brunette warned the blonde. Stella gave her a knowing look and rolled her eyes.

" OMG! Is that a cast?" Zayn mentally face-palmed at the stupid question. The shorter haired brunette started touching the cast gingerly as if she'd touch it too hard and it'd fall apart.

" How'd you get it?" Another one of the group asked, her voice hinting genuine curiosity.   
What Zayn wanted to say was that he went into a shop where they were selling cast and he just bought one so he could show it off to the girls, even though, he doesn't even like girls. But he stayed quiet.

" Were you shot?" Zayn sighed heavily, as he heard a few gasps.

" I'm sure you were trying to save someone when you were shot!" He clenched his eyes as a few of them started cheering. Zayn was sure that even if he told them the real story it wouldn't be of any help right now. These girls were unhinged. They would believe whatever they wanted to, so why should he even interfere?

" OMG! You are such a hero! Your photo must be in the newspaper!" Point proved. It felt like they weren't even talking to Zayn anymore. They were brainstorming and constructing a story that included Zayn for some stupid reason.

" Newspapers are old shit. I'm sure it must be on the daily mail app." Zayn was just about ready to kill himself at that point. These delirious girls were swarming him like the bloody locust. It was like they were leeches attached to his entire body draining him completely.

" Look a cockroach!" Zayn jumped for his life. He saw as all the girls started screaming bloody murder and aimlessly ran out of the room. He himself was going to follow them when he felt a hand loop around his free wrist and he was being dragged towards the inside of the class. Zayn looked at the hand on his wrist and then to the body attached to it. He could only see the back of his head.   
He had soft brown hair.

" Hi! There is no cockroach." He turned to look at Zayn. He had a reassuring smile and a pair of amused chocolate brown eyes.

" I'm Liam." He stopped in front of a canvas. Zayn straightened his clothes out the best that he could and shook his hand.

" Zayn." He said, still a little breathless.

" I know. You are Harry's new boyfriend, right? I thought he and Lori were going good but..." Zayn shook his head, a wry look covering his face.

" Not my boyfriend." He blinked rapidly as if to get the thought out of his head.

" Oh, then? He doesn't let newbies sit at his table." Liam frowned. Zayn could almost hear his mind working.

" He is my older brother." Zayn sighed. Liam's face turned red. The brown eyed lad was clearly embarrassed.

" I'm sorry I didn't know that. You just don't..." Zayn completed his sentence for him.

" Look like him. I know. I get that a lot." Zayn shrugged brushing it off but he could still see embarrassment evident on Liam's face.

" So, where's the teacher?" Zayn tried to change the topic. He saw as Liam composed himself and started talking.

" Well, Mr Rigsby gives us all a day to draw whatever we want to where ever we feel comfortable, once a week. It's usually a Tuesday or a Thursday but it depends. So, you can get your supplies and get going. You have to submit it tomorrow so I suggest you don't bunk off like everyone else and well produce something." Liam looked at him and the other students. Zayn smiled at the older lad before gathering his things.

" I promise I won't. Thanks Liam. I'll see you around." He waved at the brunette before turning around and heading out of the classroom.

For a moment there, Zayn almost regretted not asking the nice lad to come with him. What was Liam thinking? Did Zayn scare him away? He had helped Zayn. Zayn probably should've asked him to come. All these thoughts raced through his mind but then he thought of the drawing he was supposed to submit the next day and well he simply got distracted.

Zayn tried searching a place where there'd be no one and it'd be entirely peaceful. He had the entire school mapped out in his head. He cut of various spots, virtually, before he decided to go to the playground. Well, whatever was left of the playground. It was at the backside of the school building and by the looks of it, the playground hadn't been used in ages. There was a swing set sitting right in the middle of it, the chains and the stand of the swing were covered in rust.

Zayn sat at the base of the swing. He crossed his legs and placed the sketchpad in his lap. He scratched his head as a million ideas crossed his mind. He wanted to draw something extraordinary yet beautiful. He didn't want to come off as too strong on his first drawing but he also didn't want to sell himself short.

It started with a stroke.

Zayn wasn't intending anything, specifically. Maybe it was the way Harry had been treating him the entire week. Maybe it was the urge to ask Harry what was so wrong about him talking to Louis. Actually, He wasn't even talking to Louis, not intentionally anyway. Louis was just there every time Zayn needed him. Why did Harry hate Louis so much? What was so wrong about the feathery-haired boy?

Zayn couldn't even ask Harry, not after the conversation at the cafeteria. Harry wouldn't leave Zayn's side after that. He dropped him off at every class, picked him up at the end of every class and well just stayed with him at all times.

So, when the first stroke of the grey pencil turned into a detailed sketch of Harry's face, Zayn was not that surprised.

Harry had the concerned face. His eyes were soft and his lips pushed together, a little frown placed on his forehead. Maybe Zayn wanted to see that face on Harry. He knew it was selfish of him but he liked when Harry was concerned about him. It made him feel like he was important, worth caring. And it was way better than the overly enthusiastic yet cold face that Harry supported these days.

A last soft edge to Harry's curls and Zayn was done. He blew over the sketch once before raising it at arms length. There was a hint of sadness to the smile that appeared on Zayn's face. The sketch he drew was flawless but it made him feel nostalgic. He didn't like the feeling.

He gave the sketch a brief once over before putting it in his file carefully. He took out another paper. Zayn wasn't quite finished yet.

Unlike the last drawing, this one was a bit more free hand. It was actually a very precise set of headphones with a dash of skulls and roses here and there, a few song lyrics here and there. Overall it was a doodle. Zayn wasn't really paying attention. At one point, he couldn't even account for his hand moving. It was like it had a mind of its own and it was going on and on without him needing to think anything.

" You know, this is my place?" Zayn stopped his movements, utterly startled. He turned his head towards the origin of the voice.   
There he was sitting on the swing.  
Louis wasn't really looking at him. Actually, he was looking directly in front of himself. He had a cigarette pressed to his lips and a lighter in his fingers.

" How long have you been here?" Zayn scratched the back of his neck,trying to subtly cover his drawings with the immensity of the cast.

" Long enough. You know you shouldn't hide it. It's actually bearable." Louis took a long puff. Zayn wasn't sure if it was a compliment or not but the butterflies in his stomach stated otherwise.

He tried breathing through his nose so the smoke would be less harmful.

" Why do you smoke? It's dangerous." Zayn coughed, still trying to cover his drawing.

" Why do you care?" He frowned at the older lads statement. The raven haired lad didn't understand where all of that was coming from. Louis was never like this with him.

" Because..." Zayn didn't know what to say." You are human and I'm human and we should care!" And now he felt stupid.

He almost covered his face with his sleeve but he didn't want to be rude, especially not to Louis.

" Not a good enough reason." Louis' face was still void of any emotion. Zayn frowned slightly. He turned towards his drawing away from Louis. Maybe, diverting his attention would help.

" So, How'd you discover this place?" Louis' voice was dull and uninterested.

" Well.." Zayn suppressed his cough. " I just kinda did I guess."

" Hmm." Zayn coughed again.This time, a wheezing sound followed by. He pressed at his chest trying to prevent the bundling knots in his rib cage. 

" Zayn.." He didn't realise when it got too much for him and he burst into a chained series of coughs. Louis was almost immediately at his side, the cigarette still in his fingers. Zayn crawled away from Louis pointing at his cigarette. The feathery haired lad looked perplexed. He shifted his gaze from Zayn towards his lit cigarette. Realization shone on his face before he threw the cigarette far away.

" Are you okay?" Louis reached up to the younger lad. Zayn was still in the process of getting his breathing back to normal, his free hand pressed to his chest.

" 'fine." Zayn wanted to let out a few reassuring words but he still had to gasp a little to normalise his breathing. He was so drained that he couldn't help but lay flat on the ground, his drawings and backpack forgotten.

" Are you daft? Why didn't you stop me?" Louis pulled the smaller lad onto his lap, cradling him up to his chest. Zayn could feel Louis' thumping heart in his ear. The older lad was clearly scared.

" I didn't want to be rude." He mumbled, placing a soft hand on the older lads chest.

" Rude! You wanna talk about rude! You don't talk to me when I talk to you. You avoid me at all costs, have your brother guard you at all times so that I won't talk to you! That's what rude is! Not when you tell me you have asthma and I shouldn't smoke around you.That's not rude.That's genius. Are you serious? Rude! Don't wanna be rude!" Louis mimicked the younger lad, clearly frustrated. Zayn frowned, his lower lips wobbling. He was hurt and drained and now he felt stupid.

" I didn't do anything." He whispered almost to himself, still rubbing onto his chest. Louis placed his own hand onto his smaller one, gently caressing it with his fingertips.

" Does it hurt?" Zayn merely nodded. He could feel the tears pooling at the corner of his eyes.

" Why do you care?" Louis smiled softly.

" Because you are human and I'm human and we should care!" Both of them chuckled. Zayn was still a bit far off.

" You said you'd tell me why you guys hate each other someday? Is someday today?" Zayn's voice came out small and hurt. Louis shifted his gaze from his chest to his face. His eyes were filled with concern.

" I said someday when we don't meet in a weird situation." Louis' voice was sincere. He wiped a few tears that escaped the younger lads eyes.

Zayn sat up, gingerly getting of off Louis' lap.

" Harry must be looking for me." He fixed his raven locks trying to look better than he felt.

" Hey, can I keep this?" Louis' picked up the doodle. Zayn wasn't even a tad bit surprised when he felt himself nod.

It was Louis, he had that effect on him. He made him feel comfortable in his own skin and the smile on his face was enough reward for him. The only thing was that he wished he had drawn something a bit more special. Louis was special.

He got up slowly, still adjusting a bit due to his troubled breathing. Louis gave him a bit of support before handing him all of his supplies.

" Should I like drop you off?" Zayn shook his head

" I don't think Harry would like that." Zayn turned around and started walking slowly. He knew he should've said something about seeing Louis again but it felt like it went unsaid.

All the way back to the class, he could only picture Louis' face. How it went from emotionless to distressed in merely seconds. How his eyebrows were scrunched together, his lips ajar and his eyes shining with concern.

Zayn was hurt, breathless and drained but he was hopeful.

Maybe Louis' was his new reassuring face.

+  
Edited  
6/11/16


	9. ۸

Zayn was screwed.

He couldn't find it. He had looked for it everywhere from his locker to his cupboards, everywhere.

It was gone.

" What are you looking for?" He looked up to see Lori leaning on the door frame. Her long dirty blonde hair was neatly tied into a ponytail. The shocking pink dress a bit too much with her fair complexion.

Lori was Harry's girlfriend. She was nice and that was all Zayn could say about her, considering she was Harry's girlfriend and it's not nice to judge people. Ever since the first time Zayn had met her, Lori came over almost every day. In fact, he hadn't seen that much of Niall compared to Lori and that was saying something. Hence, Zayn wasn't surprised when she just appeared out of nowhere, at least not anymore. 

" My book." He slumped down on his bed, exasperation clear on his face.

" What book?" She straightened herself before entering the room.

" I borrowed it from the library. I have to return it today and I can't find it!" He looked over at the girl, his posture screaming with stress.

" Where did you read it last?" Zayn pulled on to his raven locks as she inquired.

He placed his elbows on his knees, one of his hands cupping his face.

" That's a good question." He closed his eyes softly.

Actually, that was the thing, Zayn couldn't remember reading the book. In fact, he only remembered about the book because of Mrs Lisbon, the librarian. Zayn couldn't get the feeling of panic that washed over him, when he was called out before lunch, out of his head. He thought he was in some kind of big trouble but when the old lady had reminded him softly that he was due to return the book that day, Zayn wasn't quite reassured. As a matter of fact, he had been nothing but a bundle of jitters since then.

" And what's that supposed to mean?" She frowned, perplexed.

Zayn sighed, heavily.

" I didn't." He breathed out softly as if trying to himself more than her.

" What was it about, anyway?" She pressed on the matter, a tinge of curiosity in her tone.

" It was that Dan Brown Novel, The Da Vinci Code." Confusion clouded his mind as something darkened in Lori's expression. He was about to ask her if she had seen it when she said.

" Never even heard of it." And Zayn could only nod at her statement.

" But I am sure you'll find it. Now get up we have to get back to school, lunch is almost over. Where is the fucktard?" She exclaimed, turning towards Harry's room.

Much to his mother's displeasure, Zayn had decided to move back into his own room since he'd gotten rid of his cast two days ago. It felt like both him and Harry needed a bit of space from each other so, Zayn decided to go back to his childhood bedroom. And since he was recovering properly, there wasn't really a reason for anyone to object to his wish.

" Harry's in the car and you two were supposed to be there ten minutes ago." Zayn packed his back haphazardly before following Lori down the stairs.

" Hey! Where's my kissy, now?" Zayn quickly backtracked in his path placing a soft kiss on his mother's cheek.

" Lose that frown my baby boy!" She kissed on both his cheeks softly before ruffling his black hair playfully.

" Zayn!" He rushed down the stairs, quickening his pace at the urgency of his brother's voice. Harry was sitting in the car, Lori right beside him in the passengers seat. Both of them had an impatient expression on their faces. Zayn felt the blush rising in his neck. The couple were acting as if he made them wait for hours which were actually no more then twenty minutes. He sat in the back seat his head down.

" Zayn, you are gonna be walking to school and back if you keep this up." Harry looked at him through the rear view mirror. Zayn couldn't understand the genuine strictness in his older brothers expression.

" Yeah and you'll be walking right beside him!" Lori scoffed.

" I'm sorry won't be late again." his voice was laced with guilt.

" Oh, don't be sorry Zayn. Harry's just being stupid." Lori turned in her seat to look at him.

" No, it's fine. I'll walk tomorrow." Zayn felt downtrodden. Harry's words meant everything to him and recently it felt like he meant nothing to Harry. His brother had been with him at all times but simultaneously, been so distant. Zayn couldn't even reach him no matter how hard he tried.  
Harry had always been there no matter what, in different forms and shapes but always there. When Zayn was trapped with his father, he was only surviving for Harry's sake. Harry gave him hope and now he took it away from him. Zayn never had to reach out to Harry. So, if he didn't know how to reach out to the curly haired lad it wasn't exactly his fault.

Zayn felt as if a misunderstanding was blooming between them. On the other hand, he felt as if he was the one who had misunderstood the entire situation. He had done this! He needed to fix it! Alas, He didn't know how so, he couldn't fix it. Hence, he felt like he had failed yet again.

He kept his head down the entire way to school. When the car stopped, he slowly got out of the car waiting for Harry to reach up to him. Zayn didn't know if Harry was still going to drop him off but he didn't want to take any chances. So, he stood there next to the car until Harry came beside him and they started walking. Zayn was still looking at his feet, feeling the intensity of Harry's gaze on him but he was too scared to look up. Harry could be terrifying when he wanted to be and Zayn definitely didn't want that. Not when he already had a problem at his hands.

His book!

Zayn looked up, startled by the thought of the strict librarian insulting him and banning him from the library forever. In that process, his gaze accidentally landed on Harry's face.The curly haired lad was looking directly at him, his emerald eyes filled with what Zayn could only discern as betrayal.

Zayn was confused. What was going on in Harry's head?

"Harry!" The older lad was startled out of his thoughts by the shrill voice that belonged to his girlfriend. He looked at her, puzzled. She breathed heavily before knocking on the locker beside her signalling they were on their first stop.

" Oh." Harry headed towards his locker, Zayn walking to the opposite row up to his own locker. The raven haired lad was still thinking about what exactly Harry was going through.

" This isn't opening!" Harry had breathed. Zayn turned to look at the pair who were trying to get the locker opened. Harry was pulling on the knob with full strength when Lori pushed him to the side and fidgeted with the code a bit.

" See, you put 6 instead of 9 again! What are you dyslexic, Harry?" Harry looked at the code carefully, merely nodding his head. His girlfriend clicked onto the knob, a triumphant smile covering his face.

Zayn couldn't help but laugh at the next scene. The door opened with a jerk and a fountain of red unleashed itself onto Lori and Harry. The couple raised their hands in front of their faces, apparently as self-defense. It went on for a few moments before coming to an end.

Harry wiped his face with the back of his hand. Zayn could see the anger dissipating through his calm composure. His eyes were clenched shut, his nose flared as he breathed deeply. If it were an animated movie, there would be steam coming out of Harry's ears.

Lori, on the other hand, was a very different case. The girl couldn't stop screaming. Like literally, She touched the sticky stuff on her body, looked at it and screamed before starting the process all over again.

Zayn spotted Louis in the opposite corner. He was standing right in front of Harry's locker, his eyes crinkling with amusement as a victorious smile etched itself onto his face. Coincidentally, their gazes connected and then they were laughing together.

Louis shrugged signalling to Zayn. Zayn gave him a thumbs up in return. The raven haired lad was so endorsed in the mischievous glint in Louis' eyes that he completely forgot about his surroundings. That was until Harry grabbed him by his shoulder and dragged him up to the boys room. Zayn could hear Lori's urgent screaming behind them but Harry's grip was over powering all.

Harry released him once they were in the washroom. Zayn stood tensely in his position, scared that if he moved he'd disturb Harry more. He watched as the curly haired lad tried cleaning himself the best he could.

" Ketchup!" Harry spat, trying to get the stickiness out of his curls.

Zayn was still stoned to his position when he was done. The older lad wiped his face with his hands, drying them on his shirt.

" Why were you laughing?" Harry fumed. Zayn's lower lip wobbled at the tone of his older brother.

" Are you going to answer me or what?" Zayn flinched still not able to form words.

Harry looked at him expectantly before shaking his head.

" You know what!? Forget it!" Zayn saw as Harry rushed out of the room, leaving him there to nothingness.

Zayn was Lost.

+  
Edited  
6/12/16


	10. ۹

Some people could be very friendly. Extremely, almost uncomfortably friendly.

And How did Zayn knew that? Well,the answer to that was a two syllable word.

Stella.

That girl didn't know what personal space was. The Dalia Royce clone wouldn't leave Zayn alone. She sat with him in every class every single day. She passed him creepy looks as if they had some kind of inside joke, only Zayn didn't know about it. The blonde even wrote little messages on the corner of his notebook with a few little hearts around it. It was like Zayn was reading a book and an entire section of it was missing. Since, when were he and Stella buddies?

The younger lad would've considered her as a public nuisance but the only problem was that she was only that nice to Zayn. He didn't saw her giving out back massages to anyone but him. In fact, he didn't even saw her doing anything even remotely nice to anyone but him.

Stella was what Liam called a queen bee. She was the Regina George of her group of the plastics. Whatever she wanted fell at her feet and she didn't even have to move her pinky. She didn't have to be nice to anyone, everyone was already too into her. So, why was she nice to Zayn? The dark haired lad didn't have the least of the idea.

If it were Harry she was being nice to. Zayn would've assumed she was flirting and wanted to go out with the older lad. However, since it was him, he couldn't help but think there was this huge conspiracy behind her actions. Maybe, she wanted to get herself in his good books so, that she could make fun of him later with all of her wanna be friends. Maybe it was a dare and she's gonna embarrass him in front of everyone. The amber eyed lad was ready to believe anything as long as it didn't involve her liking him genuinely. But no matter how hard he tried he knew the spark in her eyes and the smile on her face were authentic. That girl totally liked him and that was a bit of a problem.

Zayn wasn't even sure when he started talking to the girl or what even gave her the idea of him, even remotely, liking her? The tan skinned lad just didn't know.

No offence to the girl. She was pretty and popular. Most of the boys in the school would give up everything to date her but she was a girl and well that was the major problem. Zayn didn't swing that way.

He was gay and it wasn't like he announced it to anyone but he just assumed that everyone knew.Well, not everyone.

The raven haired lad wanted to tell Stella but he wasn't sure about it. Like, what if she's playing her? Or what if it was really a dare? But What if she asked him out directly? What was he gonna say?

' I'm sorry I've been leading you on but I thought you naturally knew I was gay and you were going way out of your way to do something nice for once. So, I just never told you?'

Yeah, he wasn't so sure if that would work.

Anyways, Zayn didn't want to get embarrassed so, he decided to put up with her nagging for some more time until he gets a boyfriend or she gets the idea that he's not interested in her. Most probably, the latter.

That's exactly why he was sitting in the library whilst she sat behind him giving him a back rub. Her hands were small, very small. So, it was more like tickling than a back rub. 

" Is it helping?" Zayn suppressed a giggle as she rubbed onto his sides. He shifted his gaze from the book in his lap to Liam who was sitting in front of him with his legs crossed. His eyes were crinkling with amusement as he tried to keep a straight face.

" Why do you even study? The teachers are gonna give you the grades anyway. I mean, look at yourself." He hummed at her statement trying to concentrate on his book.

" Yeah! Zayn, you don't need to study." Zayn kept his gaze on the book pretending that he didn't hear what his best friend said. 

Yes, his best friend. Ever since that first art class, Liam and Zayn had grown really close. In fact, Zayn couldn't remember the last time he was that close to one of his friends. Liam was a really nice lad, goofy and considerate simultaneously. They were so alike in some ways and so different in others but they were good for each other and both of them knew it. Liam was older than Zayn by a year but he understood him just fine. He visited the Styles house almost every other day and they'd do everything from playing video games to watching movies, reading comic books, almost everything. The days when Liam wasn't over, Zayn was allowed to go visit him. So, Zayn had finally found himself a friend who was worth his friendship.

" You should study, Liam. I mean, you're not Zayn!" The blonde stated, her tone obvious. A small smile crept up to Zayn's lips. The younger lad waited to hear what his friend had to say about that.

" Well, I don't have to be him!" Zayn held back a chuckle at the genuine agitation in Liam's tone. A tremor passed his body, as he heard cackles right behind him.

" You don't have to be him, silly. You should want to be him. Everybody should want to be him." Zayn sighed heavily, slumping a bit in his position.

" See, you're relaxing. Told you, all you needed was a back rub." And that made him want for the ground to open up and swallow him. He knew he should've felt good. That was what you were supposed to feel when people compliment you but the only thing he felt was anxiousness over the whole matter. He couldn't help but think about the point where Stella would, eventually, find out.

Terrifying.  
She would probably roast him alive in front of the entire school and maybe feed him to her supposed dogs.

" I have to go!" Zayn stated, getting up abruptly, Stella's hands still on his back. He started packing his bag, squirming to get out of the blonde's grasp, as subtly as possible. 

" Dude, You forget you have to sneak out of here. The librarian thinks you have the flu!" Liam grabbed him from his shoulder, placing him back on the ground. Almost immediately, Stella leaned beside him, her hands still around his back.

" Let me see if it's clear!" Zayn rolled his eyes at the secrecy in Liam's tone. What did he think they were doing? Breaking out of jail?

He watched as the brown haired lad, crept up to the front of the library, extremely slowly, looked around him, acting nonchalant.

"It's clear," Zayn smiled, shaking his head at his best friends antics. Liam had an urgent expression, as he waved his hand furiously. Zayn was sure that Liam was making it look like more of a scene than it actually was but at least he was there with him and he was thankful for that.

Zayn walked with Stella right behind him.

" Oww." He grimaced when he felt a strong hand at the back of his neck, forcing him to look down.

" What are you doing!? Keep your head down!" Liam whispered right in his ear.

" Stop it, Liam! You hurt him! Are you okay?" Zayn felt Stella's small hand carding through his hair as she placed the other one on his cheek.

" Why are we stopping? We need to get out, now!" Zayn looked as his friend almost jumped, trying to emphasise his point.

" What were you thinking, Liam? Look there's a bruise on his neck, now!" Stella spat, pushing Liam, forcefully.

" No, there's not! I wasn't that harsh!" He had an incredulous look on his face. Stella kept glaring at him, her hand still on the back of Zayn's neck." OMG! Is it!" Liam rushed up to the shorter lad, inspecting his neck for bruises. Zayn could see the guilt appearing on his face.

" See, don't you ever touch him again!"

" I don't see it. Where is it? Is it internal!"

Zayn felt a blush creep up under the skin on his ears. He was in a fairly awkward situation with two people inspecting the back of his neck for bruises as he stood exactly in front of the library's door. Anybody who walked past the door or came inside could see them clearly and well Zayn wasn't very comfortable with that.

" Zayn Malik." For a moment it felt like Zayn's heart had stopped. He had imagined the voice too much in his head for it to be unfamiliar. The librarian stood right in front of him, her white hair tucked neatly in a bun, a stern expression on her face. She looked cranky and old, nothing out of the usual.

Zayn felt as both of his friends removed their hands from his neck and straightened themselves before the grouchy lady.

" I take it, your flu is gone?" Zayn felt himself nod. Mrs.Lisbon following his actions.

"Did I forget to remind you about the book?" She crinkled her eyes,questioningly. Zayn felt sick as the nervousness started to bundle up in his stomach.

" No, mam." He struggled to keep his head up, the intensity of the old lady's gaze getting too much for him.

" Hunh, when was it supposed to be back?" She mocked interest, her eyebrows raised.

" A week ago." He let out embarrassed. 

" And where is it? I don't think you brought it back or did you?" She shook her head as she talked. Zayn shook his head, trying to look anywhere but in her eyes.

" Hunh, The next time I see you in this library, I want to see the book, too. Understand?" The amber eyed lad nodded furiously, trying to escape any further embarrassment. Mrs Lisbon nodded at him curtly, before moving out of the way. After that, all three of them were quick to get out of the library.

When they were out in the hallway, Zayn took a heavy sigh. He rubbed at his forehead,as a piercing headache originated at the back of his head.

" It's all your fault!" Liam accused pointing towards Stella.

" Excuse me but I don't talk to hurters." Liam gasped, disbelief evident in his eyes.While, she simply rolled her eyes, twirling a loose strand of his hair. Zayn restrained himself from telling her that it wasn't a word but didn't have to put much effort into that.

" That isn't even a word!" Liam stomped his feet, anger laced his voice.

" Stop it, guys. It's just." Zayn waved his hand. "Whatever. I couldn't have hidden away forever."

" Yeah and it's probably for the better. You won't have to go to the stupid library anymore!" Stella looked at him, a hopeful smile on her face. Zayn couldn't help but frown at the blondes statement. What did she mean, he wouldn't have to. He couldn't even if he wanted to. That's a huge difference.

But being Zayn he just ignored her.

" Yeah! That was exactly why we sneaked into the library like thieves for the entire week." Liam scoffed, sarcasm dripping his voice.

" Whatever." Her tone was bored and uninterested.

" So, your house today?" The shorter lad asked Liam. He saw as the expression on the other lads face changed from utterly frustrated to excited in mere seconds.

" Yeah! I'll totally beat you at Tekken today!" He smiled, his brown eyes crinkling with enthusiasm.

" I'll have Harry drive me as soon as I get to him," Zayn smiled.

" What's Tekken?" And then he felt it drop. For a good second there, Zayn had forgotten about Stella. The shorter lad took a deep breath before turning to look at the queen of plastics. Stella was smiling at him.

" Oh, it's a video game. Very bloody and gory and yucky." Zayn tried to convince the blonde, nodding his head a little too much.

" And it's at my home and you are not invited." Liam didn't even try being nice." Now goodbye." the brown haired lad took Zayn by the hand and dragged him away from the girl.

" Bye!" Zayn had managed to turn around and wave to the girl. What? He didn't want to be rude.

" Why do you even tolerate her!" Liam said when they were at a safe distance.

" Because she's nice." He said looking at his feet.

" Yeah very nice, apparently," Liam emphasised, sarcastically.

" I don't know." The shorter lad shrugged.

" Do you like her? Am I gonna hate my best friends girlfriend?" his voice came out surprisingly serious.

" She's not my girlfriend!" Zayn said.

" Well, she acts like one, a clingy one. And I don't see you stopping her!" Liam shook his head.

" I don't want to." The younger lad let out sheepishly causing Liam to throw his hands in the air.

" So you admit you want to go out with her." He stated, instead of questioning.

" No!" Zayn almost screamed.

" But you just said.." Liam was adamant.

" I'm Gay!" He came out to his friend.

" Oh." Liam looked dumbfounded.

" Yeah." Zayn felt awkward.

" Thank God, I wouldn't have to deal with her! Why didn't you tell me?" He sighed in relief.

" Cause I thought you knew! I thought everybody knew." Zayn said, exasperated.

" And why is that?" Liam inquired, his tone surprised.

" Cause..I don't know I just did." He said sheepishly.

" Oh my Zaynie! It's fine. You just have to tell that bitch that you play for the other team and we would never have to see her again." The older lad placed his arm around Zayn's shoulder.

" I don't know how!" He couldn't think of anything else to say.

" Zayn!" Both the friends looked at the couple who were standing right across from them almost beside the lockers. Harry was looking the other way only his curls on display while Lori called out to Zayn.

" Go, we'll figure something out when you come over." Liam patted his back before turning towards the opposite way.

Zayn slowly walked over to Lori. 

" I'll just get my books." He pointed towards his locker.

" Okay." She smiled at him.

The raven haired lad turned a bit before walking up to his locker.

Even from a distance Zayn knew something was up.

There were a few people standing around his locker and when he tried to get to it, everybody looked at him with a strange expression on their faces. Shrugging it off, Zayn looked at his locker.

That was when the panic started. His locker wasn't properly closed and there was some kind of a purplish liquid coming out of it. Zayn felt as if somebody had pulled his heart out through his back.

Hesitantly, the amber-eyed lad reached up to open the locker, his small hand trembling.

As soon as he pulled the door open, it was like a bucket full of fear was spilt on him and he was drenched in the sentiment.

Zayn wished he hadn't opened it.

+  
Edited  
6/12/16


	11. ۱۰

The thing with Louis was that he really liked watching Zayn.

Watching him as he intently listened to the lecture,his amber eyes showing genuine interest. Watching the awkwardness dripping through his posture when he was around that blonde girl. Watching as he walked with his brother with his head down,none of them talking. Watching him smile as he talked to his brown haired friend,his tongue peeking out his teeth,cutely.

There were a lot of things Louis liked watching but most importantly he liked watching Zayn talk. There was a special glint in the amber eyes,as he chattered on. His voice dripping like honey and spreading smoothly in Louis' ears.

Louis loved when Zayn talked.

The younger lad came to the play ground every Tuesday or Thursday .He sat on his spot and drew as Louis watched him. Drawing was another thing Louis loved watching Zayn do. His drawings were perfect. Every single one of them had a genuine meaning behind and Louis was glad that he was able to see them through. Understand them,understand Zayn.

Zayn gave him a drawing every time they met. He cherished them and kept them close to himself. It had came to a point where Louis waited for Zayn to give him a drawing. He liked it when Zayn drew for him. It was like the amber eyed lad gave him a piece of himself with every drawing and Louis loved that thought. It was just for him have and for him to keep.

In that hour of a lesson they talked back and forth,never having to start or end the conversation. Just leaving it there,to start it again the next time they saw each other. Both of them sure,that there would to be a next time.

Louis got to know a lot about Zayn. To put it simply,the little guy was an honest,shy and kind hearted,art nerd. He loved reading comics,wolverine was his favorite character. Drawing was way more than just a hobby for him. He wasn't that fond of sports and was more a homebody. He loved to read and Louis was almost positive that there wasn't even one book that hadn't crossed Zayn's path and also,he occasionally wrote. He had to live away from his family for more than a year and well he wasn't that sentimental about his father. The raven haired lad hadn't told Louis that but the gloomy expression on his face,when the older lad asked him about his 'dad',was all the conformation he needed. Harry was his ideal and he praised him a bit too much for Louis' ears,but the feathery haired lad never stopped him.

There was something about Zayn when he talked to Louis. The younger lad was clearly an introvert and always kept to himself. The entire school knew that but around Louis he was a chatterbox.

The cerulean eyed lad loved the fact,that he made Zayn comfortable enough. The younger lad was honest in every statement that left his mouth and never showed an ounce of hesitation. Louis himself was surprised by how loose Zayn was around him.

Was Zayn that trusting with everyone?He hoped not.

It was a Friday and it was already day end. So,Louis wasn't really expecting for Zayn to come to the playground. He had been standing near the swing,when he heard him. The long stride in his pace,Louis could recognize him anywhere. He turned to look at him,a small smile appearing on his face,only to be replaced by a frown.

Zayn was crying.His eyes were bloodshot,tears streamed down his tan cheeks. His lips wobbled,as he hiccuped through a sob. He looked absolutely devastated.

As soon as the younger lad had spotted Louis,he ran towards him. To say,he was not prepared for what had happened next,wouldn't be that wrong. Zayn wrapped his skinny arms around Louis' neck,hiding his face in the crook of his shoulder. For a second there,Louis had been too surprised to do anything,but then he wrapped his own arms around the skinny lads waist.

The feathery haired lad felt as Zayn's frail frame vibrated against his chest. Concern pooled at the bottom of his stomach.

"Zayn?"His voice came out more worried than he had intended. The tan skinned lad did nothing but cried. Sobbed racked his flimsy figure and wobbled out of his lips.

"Come on Zaynie!Tell me what happened?" Louis tried to soothe the boy,tracing soft circles on the small of his back.

"They...They.." Another sob tore itself out of Zayn's body.

Louis pulled away from the hug,to look at him,directly. He felt his heart clench,at the sadness and hurt in those amber eyes. He cupped his face with both of his hands,placing a soft kiss on his forehead.

"You okay?Are you hurt?" Zayn shook his head,slightly.His lips wobbling,as he hiccuped through another wail.

"Now,will you calm down for me?"Louis took his smaller hand in his own and sat him down on the ground,situating himself right in front of him.

"Tell me what happened." His voice came out soft and concerned.

"They...somebody." He hiccuped,wiping his nose with the back of his sleeve."They destroyed the book!The library book." He wailed.

"The one you lost?" Zayn nodded furiously,still sobbing.

Louis felt an unexplainable rush of anger surge through his body.Who could do that to Zayn?WHY would someone do something like that to Zayn?

"I won't be able to go to the library ever again and there will be the fine and.." His heart shattered at the sight of the boy hyperventilating.

"Zayn,listen!Look at me!" He place his hand under his chin.

"Nothing bad is gonna happen.Not on my watch!Okay?" Louis looked directly into his eyes. The amber eyes that told him a story. A story of hurt and confusion.

Zayn nodded,his sobs coming to a halt but the hiccups remained,persistent.

"Now tell me who did it?" His voice was gentle.

"I don't know." He sniffled.

"What do you mean?"The raven haired lad looked at him,with uncertainty on his face.

"I went to the locker and there was something purple coming out of it.Still,I opened it and there it was,right in the middle,completely drenched.It was grape juice.I could smell it and it was every where and it ruined my locker and...and...and." He failed to form words to explain anymore than that. He was almost at the verge of a panic attack and Louis wasn't blind not to see it.

"Trust me,Zayn. Nothing is the end of the world,love.We'll fix this.I'll fix this." The feathery haired lad nodded his head,trying to get his point across.

"Okay." Zayn nodded.

"Now,no more crying.Some one as beautiful as you,should never cry.People like me would die." He wiped the tears from under the other lads eyes.

And If Louis was being too cheesy,Zayn didn't say and Louis didn't care.

"You're drawing got ruined." He sniffled,taking a piece of paper out of his backpack.

Louis took the crumpled paper in his hand and opened it carefully. It was sticky and purple but it was beautiful. This time,it was a garden full of flowers,with the details only a true artist could provide. Louis felt Zayn's gaze on him and looked up to see the lad looking at him,expectantly.

"It's beautiful.Just a bit more purple than usual but still beautiful.I'm keeping it." Louis folded it carefully before placing it in his bag.

And if the smile on Zayn's face was anything to go by,Louis knew he appreciated it.

"Now lets go clean up your locker." The feathery haired lad stood up,sticking his hand out for the other one to take.

"No!I can't see that again!" Zayn shook his head so hard,Louis was worried he'd be dizzy later.

"Come on,Zaynie. I'll help you out." He raised both of his eyebrows.

"No,you don't get it.The books,they are,I don't know,like precious and....and somebody....They just purposely dropped juice on them.How could they,Louis?How could they?" The innocence radiating out his eyes,was too intense for Louis. He turned his head to the opposite side,placing both his hands on his hip.

"I don't know,Zee. There are all kinds of people in this world.Sweet like you,stupid like me,ugly like you're brother and cruel like them."He sighed.

"Harry's not ugly." Zayn said a little frown on his face.Louis completely ignored the statement and continued.

"But don't you worry.I'll find the bastard behind this and you'll get to watch me kill them." A genuinely evil smile appeared on his face.

Zayn let his gaze fall for a second before looking up again.

And it might sound insensitive,but even in that state,Zayn was beautiful. Exhausted,tired,hurt but still beautiful. His amber eyes hooded under the curtain of those thick black eyelashes. His lips in a soft,unintentional pout. His black hair sticking out in the most perfect of ways. His beauty was almost too overpowering,for plain eyes like that of Louis'.

"Okay." The younger lad let out softly,before sticking out his hand. Louis took his smaller hand in his own and pulled him up to his feet.

From there,both the lads walked in silence. Louis looked at Zayn's slumped form,sadness leaking out of his posture. That made Louis' strangely protective of the other lad. Zayn was too nice for the world. Too naive,to expect the harsh realities,that it threw at them. He was too innocent,to understand the cruelties of the world and for some odd reason Louis wanted to protect that about Zayn. To protect his perspective of the world,too pure,too clueless. He wanted to see the younger lad happy and careless,like he always was around him. He wanted to see him smile,to take all his sadness away.

And so,he did something he was good at,something exceptionally stupid.

As they entered the hallway,Louis saw the janitor in front of them. The old man had his back towards them,as he bended down to pick something off of the ground,his rear exposed to their view.

The feathery haired lad had once been told,that he had an IQ level of a five year old child. So,that's what he was exactly proving.

He rushed across from where he had been standing and landed a hard kick on the janitors butt,the old man tumbling onto his face. Immediately,Louis turned to look at Zayn,who stood there clearly taken aback,his mouth ajar and eyebrows raised. The older boy took his hand and ran down the path they had came from. And if Zayn heard the janitors curses,he didn't mention it.

When they reached a safe distance,they stopped. Both clutching on to their knees,gasping for breath. Louis watched as the shorter lad dissolved into a bunch of giggles,his eyes scrunched together,as soft voices left his lips .And if that didn't made Louis' heart swell,nothing ever could.

"Why did you do that?" He laughed,clutching onto his stomach.

"Well,I thought he'd turn into a football and start rolling around." and that made him laugh harder. Louis felt the corner of his lips twitch up to form a smile of his own. He liked this side of Zayn better,it was more soothing than the sad one. If Louis was a desert,Zayn's smile was rain.And his giggles were the sun,in the cold of December.

"Let's not go to the locker." The older lad let out,not wanting for the younger one to get sad again.

"Yeah.Drop me home?" Zayn asked expectantly,a smile still fixated on to his lips.

"Sure.Where's that douche of a brother of yours,anyway?" Louis hadn't expected for his smile to drop and now he wished he had kept his mouth shut.

"I don't know.He was staring like everyone and Well,I just ran." Louis placed a hand on his shoulder and shook his head.

"Lets not talk about him." He said quietly and the other lad nodded in agreement.

"You're gonna be fine?hmm...Smile for me.." The smile that appeared on Zayn's face was genuine and hearty.

Louis wasn't sure about Zayn but he knew he was going to be fine after that smile.

..........................................................................................................................................................................

Hi again.

Is this good enough?

Was it worth the wait?

Louis' point of view!!!

Plus,Happy birthday Zayn.

Don't forget to tell me how you liked it.

Leave feedback.Kudos.Comment.Preach and Love Zayn.

.........................................................................................................................................................................


	12. ۱۱

Harry was enraged.

His eyes burned with anger. He had been pacing around the living room since he had returned from school,his ears bright red.

"Haz." He stopped in his tracks to look at his best friend,who was sitting on the sofa. Niall had a weary look on his face. He unwrapped the sandwich in his hands,before taking a bite of it.

"What?!" Harry spat,his nose flaring. Niall frowned at him,completely taken aback by the harshness of his tone.

"Whoa. Calm your tits,dude! Stop fucking moving around and tell me already! What happened?" The blonde yelled,throwing his hands in the air.

"Zayn happened!" Harry stated,conclusively. Niall almost rolled his eyes at his friends exaggeration.

"What did he do this time? Walked from one class to the other? You know what Harry you need to give him space,he is not a.." Niall was interrupted mid sentence.

"Space! This is not about space,Niall!" Harry yelled,passing a hand through his curly hair.

"Oh really? I think it is." Niall nodded at his own statement.

"You don't know anything!" Harry shook his head

"Harry,you forget that I'm Niall. I know everything.Besides you moaned for two days when he moved back to his own room." He rolled his eyes.

"Ni." The green eyed lad tried.

" Does Zayn not like me anymore? Is Tommo washing his mind? Is it something I did? He doesn't even want to come to school with me,What should I do Niall? " He mocked his best friend.

"Niall.." Harry gritted his teeth,placing a hand on his hip.

" You know what,you should do? You should talk to him! Believe me,it works." Niall pointed out his finger,emphasizing his point

"Niall,will you shut up and listen to me!" Harry threw his hands up,clearly frustrated.

" Only if you swear to talk to your little brother." The blue eyed lad crossed his leg over the other,relaxing himself on the sofa.

"Shut up Niall!" He jumped,startled by the brutality in Harry's tone.

"Harry." Niall knew it was serious. Harry never talked to him in that tone.

"It's just." Harry breathed through his nose. "I don't know,what is wrong with him!" He shook his head,placing a hand on his hip. "He moved back to his room.And that's not the point." He raised his hand,signalling for his best friend to stop even before he started. "He said he was tired of me being with him all the time,you know I only do it cause I care about him." His tone was sincere. "But he feels 'suffocated' by my presence." He air quoted the word. "Yeah that's what he said! 'suffocated'." He emphasized the point when he saw the frown on Niall's face deepened.

"Did he say that to your face?" The blonde inquired.

"No." Harry shook his head looking away.

"Then." Niall pushed onto the matter,the frown still present on his face.

"I trust her!" Harry huffed,glaring at Niall.

"And you don't trust Zayn?" The blue eyed lad breathed through his nose,sealing his lips shut.

"I don't know anymore,Niall." His tone was battered.

"Think about it,Harry. It's Zayn we're talking about." Niall urged him.

"Yeah,Zayn." Harry scoffed. "You know,he was in the ketchup prank with Tommo. He's been hanging out with him,even though he knows.He knows how much he gets on my nerves." The anger was back on his face.

"Harry,this isn't about you." Niall tried,but it only agitated Harry more.

"The Fuck,its not!" His blue eye's widened at Harry's outburst. "It's like he's doing it just to annoy the fuck out of me!" The curly haired lad explained it the the best he could.

"Harry,listen to yourself.You're not making any sense!" Niall stood up,dropping the sandwich.

"I'm making clear sense! Zayn has outdone himself,Niall. I ran after him to check if he was okay and he was with that douche bag again! He was hugging him,Niall! I don't know,Niall! I don't know!" Harry shook his head,a tinge of betrayal in his tone.

"Harry,your too angry to see it through." Niall headed towards his friend slowly,raising his hands in front of himself,signalling that he meant no harm.

"I'm not.I'm seeing this perfectly fine! He isn't even Zayn anymore.Not my brother!" Harry kept shaking his head.

"Haz!" His statement held a warning but Harry was too stubborn to grasp at it.

"No,I hate him! If he doesn't give a fuck about me.I don't give a fuck about him either!" He stomped his feet.

"Harry..." Niall tried again.

"I've done everything,Niall. Everything for him and he gave me this in return! He doesn't deserve me! You know what! Maybe it would have been better if he lived with dad! Maybe,he'd stay better that way." He said,decisively. When he was finally done with his outburst of pent up frustrations,he looked up at his best friend to see his reaction. Niall wasn't looking at him. Instead he was looking exactly behind him.Even without looking for himself,Harry knew what was waiting for him.

It was like all his anger leaked out of his body,replacing itself with sad remorse.He heard him before he saw him. The soft sob,Harry could pinpoint anywhere. The same sob he worked so hard to replace with a smile. It ached Harry's heart that he was the one to make Zayn cry.

"Zayn." Niall sounded sympathetic. The blonde took a step forward only to be stopped.

Harry's felt his shoulders slump as Zayn rushed past him. He only saw a flash of black as the younger lad ran up the stairs. Sobs escaping his lips and breaking Harry's heart. Harry seriously wanted to disperse in thin air.

He looked at Niall. The blue eyed lad was glaring at him with such intensity,that it made Harry's toes curl.

"Got what you wanted? How low can you go Harry? " His voice spat venom.

"But he did all th.." Harry meekly tried to defend himself.

"And you know all of that because 'someone' told you!" Niall seemed like he'd explode any second.

"Niall!" He warned.

"What Harry? " Niall asked,mocking interest.

"She's my girlfriend,not someone." A frown place itself on Harry's face.

"And he's your bloody brother!" Niall yelled out exasperated.

"What do you mean?" Disappointment covered Niall's face.

He opened his mouth to say something,before closing it again.His words weren't helping him.

"Er,Hi." Both boys turned to look at the brown haired lad standing in the hallway.

Liam scratched at the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Um..Zayn said he'd come over but he didn't. So,I came to check up on him.I kinda let myself in.I'm sorry." He blabbered,clearly embarrassed.

Niall nodded at him softly.

"It's fine,Liam. He's upstairs." He pointed at the staircase.

Liam nodded awkwardly before heading towards the stairs. Harry looked at the brown haired lad as he stopped in his tracks and turned to look at him directly.

" I know it's not my place and I shouldn't even be here but you should talk to him.Whatever you think he did,I can assure you he didn't. Zayn isn't like that.Hell, I've only known him from over two months but I know he isn't like that. He's the best. He'd never do anything to disturb you. Not intentionally anyway. And not to you. Your his everything. He talks about you like you're the person who breathed his soul into him. Like you made the world for him. Your his universe and he loves you. More than anything in the entire world. So,you should talk to him and solve things up,cause even if you don't see it. He needs you. More then anything. " Liam had a small smile on his face as he spoke the words. Harry looked at the younger lad,the guilt in his stomach filling up to his heart. On one hand,Harry felt happy that Zayn had someone to look out for him. On the other hand,he was embarrassed that he was the one getting the talk. He had always been the one talking about how Zayn was the greatest person in the world and it was the first time he had been on the other side listening to it.It was all his fault.

Liam turned back in his tracks,retreating back to the stairs and making his way upstairs. Harry looked at Niall,who had a more content look on his face now. He slumped down on the couch,the events of the day finally hitting him.

"I screwed up,didn't I?" He let out,softly.

"Big time." Niall whispered.

" Go on yell at me. I deserve it." Harry breathed heavily.

" You know what,H? I'm not gonna yell at you." He shook his head. " I just wanna say that you should decide,who you should believe and who you shouldn't,and you should do it fast. Get that big head out of your ass and look around. Don't make it all about,yourself. Think about his point of view. You are not the only one who's hurting. And Talk to him. You need it." Niall turned around to leave through the front door before turning back.

"You know?" He shook his head,a distant emotion on his face. "You don't,but I do. I remember the Harry who was so willing to do anything to get his baby brother back,who'd do anything to protect his Zayn. To make him happy,to take away his pain. Where'd that Harry go? And when he did he turn into this? He'd never hurt Zayn. He'd never even think that Zayn was conspiring against him,let alone believing on it and making his life miserable. In fact,he'd kill the person who said all the stuff about his brother. I don't know,Haz. But you must be blind not to see it. Zayn isn't the one having fun in this,is he? What's he gonna get out of it? Think about it." His voice came out heavy with emotion. Harry wanted to say something to him but Niall left before he could even think of it.

Harry was regretful.He was always like this.Never able to express his emotion in the right way.Always hurting the other person way too much and becoming the bad person in the situation.

He got up and moved to his room.His heart clenched at every step he took.The sobs getting more prominent as he got nearer.

And if he didn't went up to check his younger brother it wasn't because he was heartless.It was because he was too guilty to face him.

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HI.

OMG I'm so sorry this is getting really long.Is it too slow?

I don't know,I feel so disappointed in Harry right now.

This story it does something to me! Its so contagious. Zayn's Happy I'm Happy. Harry's a douche I'm angry. Zayn's sad I'm sad.

YUCK!

p.s its cold as fuck and my fingers are freezed.

What do you think is gonna happen next?

don't forget to tell me how you liked it!

Vote.Comment.Preach.Love Zayn.


	13. ۱۲

"You sure you'll be fine? I could stay over." Zayn shook his head,wiping his nose with the corner of his sleeve.

"I'm just gonna sleep." He rasped. Liam hugged him,before getting of off the ground.

"So,will I see you tomorrow?" His tone was hopeful. Zayn simply shook his head,wiping the tears under his eyes.

"Take care,Zayn. It's gonna be fine. " He said,before turning to leave.

Sitting besides his bed,with his knees pulled up to his chest,Zayn felt paralyzed. The tears that he once cared to hide,were now freely flowing down his cheeks. His face was emotionless,completely passive.

The thought of his older brother hating him,had imprisoned him in his own body. He couldn't do anything,even if he wanted to. It shouldn't have been that shocking,though. Zayn had known Harry had a problem with him. The soft drawl which had once been the only voice in his ears,he hadn't heard it in three weeks. Those dimples that flashed with that goofy smile,Zayn had missed them. The soothing pat on his back or the encouraging hug,it was like they had never existed. The raven haired lad knew Harry was mad at him but never once had it occurred to him that he hated him. Despised his presence. Wanted for him to return to his horrible father.

Zayn had always been a dreamer. He was prone to imagining different situations and events. However,never once in his sixteen years of life,had he ever thought that this would happen. That Harry would get tired of him. That he would 'Hate' him. Honestly,Zayn had never liked that word,it held too much underlying sentiment for him. It was almost destructive,the word. He never used it,not even for his father. Harry knew that. He knew that Zayn didn't liked that word then why would he use it and no less for Zayn.

It was like Zayn had been sitting in the house,thinking it was cold,when actually there was a snowstorm waiting for him outside. The reality was much more worse than he had anticipated. Harry was not just angry at him but he despised him and Zayn was trying hard not to finish himself there and then. His cause for living,his reason to exist,his constant star was done with him. His rock,his brother,his everything was tired of him. And if that didn't distressed him,nothing ever could.

When Zayn had been living with his father,he bore all the torture,all the pain and all the resentment,just for Harry's sake. Thinking that it could've been the older lad suffering,instead of him and being grateful that it wasn't. He lived everyday thinking of the stuff they did,when they were living together. Holding onto a bit of the past,just to be able to breathe in the present. He woke up everyday wishing to see Harry and his mother,even if just for a second. When his father was too harsh on him,he'd imagine himself in Harry's embrace,missing the warmth and security it provided. He lived with the memory of safety,that his brother provided him.

And to think the person he lived for,depended on and felt for. That person hated him. It made Zayn's heart shatter and turn to rubble. The pang in his chest overpowering every sensation in his body.

He felt pointless. There was no essence left for him in life. No reason for him to exist. No reason for him to ignore the harshness of life. Nothing left. Harry was his reason and without him Zayn was purposeless.

He felt another sob bubbling in the pit of his stomach. The lump in his throat growing,piercing through the nodes and blocking his ears. His face was hot,head screaming in pain. It felt like Harry's words had sucked all the energy out of him,leaving nothing behind but a vortex of emotions. He was drained,his head lolling as he tried to support his neck. His arms slack around his frail frame. His eyes refusing to stay open any longer,drooping shut on their own accord. His knees still up to his chest,loose and limp.

Zayn felt as miserable as he looked.

................................................................................................................................................

Louis was sitting on a window sill.

More specifically,the window sill outside Zayn's room.

How got there was a long story,that included him bumping into Liam on his way over. Who eventually told him that Zayn wasn't doing that good. Then the internal battle,he had to go through to decide whether he should or shouldn't visit the Styles' residence. Also the struggle he had to go through to get to the window sill.

Harry's window had a huge tree,right beside it. Louis was so used to Harry's window,that he naturally assumed that getting to Zayn's window would be just as easy,as it was getting to Harry's window.

Well,he was clearly mistaken.

Zayn's window didn't had a tree beside it and so it was way harder to get to it. That was the first time that night,it occurred to the feathery haired lad that he should've thought it through. The second time was when he was balancing himself on the ledge of the window,trying to keep himself shut,as he saw Harry entering the room.

Louis held his breathe as he saw the curly haired lad standing at the door. Harry turned on the lights looking around the room.

The cerulean eyed lad almost stumbled when he saw the figure on the floor. He felt his heart swell at the sight before him. Zayn was sitting beside the bed,his head slumped on his shoulder,arms laying limp beside his body,knees hanging loosely up to his chest.

He saw as Harry's gaze landed on his brother,a guilt stricken look on his face. The curly haired knelt beside the sleeping one,petting his hair softly. A huge sigh escaped his lips,before he picked up Zayn,carefully placing him on the bed. Zayn folded into himself as Harry placed the duvet on his body. He sat beside his younger brother,rubbing his hands softly.

"I'm sorry,Zaynie. " Louis frowned at his words.

Harry placed a soft kiss on the black hair before retreating back and out of the room.

Louis' waited for a few minutes,making sure that Harry wouldn't come back before slowly lifting up the window and entering the room. He slowly walked up to the body on the bed,placing himself exactly where Harry had been sitting. He looked at the younger lad,whom he had grown to love more than a friend. His amber eyes were closed,those thick eyelashes caressing his cheekbones,lips morphed into a little pout. He was beautiful. 

Zayn slept oblivious to his presence. Louis' carded his hand softly through his hair,frowning at the tear tracks on his tan face. For some reason,he wanted to take it away,the pain,the sorrow. He wanted to take it all away from Zayn and to make him smile and laugh all the time. It might not have been that long but Louis' had grown fond of the younger lad. Of his little crooked teeth smile. Of the twinkle in his eyes. Of the honesty behind his word. Of his genuineness. Of him. period.

He had grown fond of Zayn and his presence in that room was the proof of it. And if he pecked him lightly on the lips,no one had to know.

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Hi guys.

I just got to carried away with Zayn being sad and all.

Also,Louis kissed him!

This is kinda short and I don't know about it but yeah!

Don't forget to tell me about it!

Vote.Comment.Preach.Love Zayn.

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	14. ۱۳

Zayn woke up early.

So early that it was still a bit dark outside,the sun still hiding behind the clouds. He dressed up as fast as he could,his body sagging in disinterest. His eyes were still burning and he was exceptionally tired. It felt like he had been hit by a truck. The encounter with his older brother was still fresh in his mind.

The raven haired lad had decided the previous night that he would walk to school from then on. He didn't wanted his brother to feel the burden of his presence anymore. If he didn't wanted to see him,he wouldn't. After all living with his father taught him one thing. Invisibility. In that year,Zayn had mastered the art of being invisible. Talk only when regarded to,avoid contact at all costs,don't raise your head,don't talk to him and most importantly,try to remain out of his sight,if possible. He just had to follow the rules and he'd be out of Harry's hair in no time.

He felt a pang in his chest,when he thought about it. The sad awareness of his older brother disowning him. Throughout the weekend,Harry hadn't looked at him once,making him feel even worse then before. He sighed heavily,swallowing the tears building at the back of his throat. Grabbing his backpack,he slowly crept out of his room and down the stairs,stopping at the last step to tie his laces.

"Zayn?" He looked up from his position to see his mother standing in the living room. Her hair resembling a birds nest,a look of confusion painted on her face. She was still in her pajamas,remnants of sleep clutching onto her like a koala bear.

"Mom." He replied nervously.

"What are you doing?" She rubbed her hands on her face,yawning.

"I am going to school?" It came out more like a question,than a statement.

He picked up his bag from beside him,placing it on his shoulder with a jerk.

"But it isn't time already,is it?" She placed her hand on her hip,squinting at the clock in the living room.

"No,but I have to go to the library.so,I'll just walk." He let out almost nonchalantly.

A frown made itself evident on her face,a question clear in her eyes.

"Just wake Harry up,he'll drop you." She said,the frown still present on her forehead.

"No,I'll just walk." He tugged on to the strap of his backpack awkwardly,before shuffling of off the stairs.

"Urm.....are you sure?" He walked up to her placing a kiss on her cheek.

"Bye,mom. I'll be fine." She looked at him,still a bit confused. He turned in his tracks and left out of the front door.

The cold air greeted him as soon as he stepped outside. For a second there,he thought about going back inside and get something warmer to wear but then he thought about his mother. With all the questions that were rising up her throat,Zayn was lucky that she was half asleep or else she would've known that there was something off and she would've never let him leave.

He hugged onto his torso,wrapping his arms around himself,trying to keep himself from freezing. The first step out was the most difficult one. After that he was too numb to differ.

Walking up to the school was his first step of being invisible. He was sure that he knew his way to school and back and the stop sign around the corner proved his assumption.

The wind was brutal,slapping across his face, chilling his nose to the core. He pulled onto the sleeves of his shirt, covering his hands,trying to keep them from freezing. His teeth were chattreing and his legs were getting heavier. Zayn was sure,he was going to freeze on the first day,he walked to school. He covered his mouth with his hands,breathing into them.

A sudden wave of wind alerted him. He turned a little to look at the car beside him,frowning as it stopped. It was a black corolla. The windows were covered with condensed fog,so Zayn couldn't see who was inside. A mild spark of fear lighted itself in his body as he saw the window lowering. He kept walking trying to seem indifferent,fear cradling his body.

"Zayn?" The fear muddled into relief as he heard the familiar voice. He stopped walking turning to look at the car.

"Louis." His teeth still chattering .

"What are you doing ?" Louis' voice held disbelief.

"Er...I'm going to school." Zayn let out nonchalantly.

Louis scrunched up his face,giving him a weird look before opening the door and coming out of the car.

"You are going to school?" He walked up to Zayn.

"Wearing this?" He gestured towards his clothes.

"In this weather?" Zayn could only nod at Louis' accusing tone.

"What are you?" His voice held agitation. He grabbed Zayn's smaller hand,dragging him to the car.

"but ...I'll walk" Zayn tried as the older lad opened the door of the passenger seat.

"Yeah right?get in." Louis added sternly. The raven haired lad looked at him for a moment.before giving up and situating himself on the seat.

Zayn would never admit it but he was glad that Louis came. The car was far more warmer then outside. Zayn felt his muscles popping and melting at the warmth. It was like his body had died and was coming back to life.

He looked at Louis,who was sitting right beside him in the drivers seat. The cerulean eyed lad was looking directly at him,concern shining on his face. He reached at the backseat grabbing something before retreating back to his place.

"Come here." He waved for Zayn,who hesitantly came closer to him. He felt the tufts of wool as Louis placed a knit sweater over his head and then through his arms. He looked down at himself. The sweater was white and naturally two size bigger than him. The sleeves went past his hands and the hem went halfway to his knees. The neck hole dangling around Zayns shoulders. He looked up as he felt something over his head.

"Stop moving." Louis placed the beanie on his head fixing it until he deemed proper. He then took the scarf of off his lap,wrapping it around Zayn's neck.

"There,done." The cerulean eyed lad took a minute to look at the work he had done before starting the car and moving for school.

"Thank you." Zayn mumbled,snuggling into his sweater. Louis looked at him for a brief second,a smile on his face.

"Couldn't have you freezing,Zaynie." Zayn felt a blush creep up to the tan of skin.

"So,did you draw me something?" Louis said cutting the silence. A wave of guilt washed over Zayn.

''No,I'm sorry.I forgot.'' Zayn blabbered.

''Hey ,it's okay.'' Louis placed his hand on his smaller one. Zayn looked at the hand,a warm feeling bubbled in his stomach.

''I drew you something.'' Louis looked at him,his smile radiant.

Zayn felt a smile of his own invading his lips.

''You did!'' His excitement seeping through his tone.

He had always been the one to draw stuff,never receiving any drawing in return.

''Yeah!I mean it isn't as good as yours but I just thought I'd give you something.'' Louis fixed the rear view mirror before reaching out in his bag to produce a piece of paper.

''Here.'' Zayn opened the drawing,carefully. It was actually a really poor attempt at drawing. There was a boy with black sticks of hair on his head,wearing a greenish shirt with green lapels and a red collar.

''It's you!'' He smiled. Zayn chuckled. His heart swelled in fondness.

''Yeah,I look like the little guys with Santa Claus.'' He giggled.

''Who?'' Louis looked at him.

''The one with pointy ears,I forgot the name.'' Zayn racked his brain trying to find the exact term.

''I don't have time to stalk Santa Claus!'' Louis tsked,seriously.

Zayn laughed at his friends statement. Only Louis ' could stay stuff like that with such seriousness.

''What?I'm too busy looking at you.'' Zayn blushed,putting his head down.

''It's really good.'' Zayn tried to divert the topic, folding the piece of paper and placing it in his bag.

''No,it's not!" He scoffed. Zayn just shook his head.

''But I'll take the compliment.'' He nodded.

''So,that book.'' Louis started hesitantly. Zayn felt a wave of panic wash over him. He had completely forgotten about the book.

''Oh God,I forgot about it!What the hell am I gonna do now? She's gonna kill me .'' He scratched at the beanie on his head ,fingers itching to feel his hair.

''Hey! Listen,you never let me complete the sentence.'' and that made Zayn stop,utterly embarrassed.

''So,I have a friend who is the best and lets just say he's really sneaky. So,he kinda bought a new copy of the novel and'' Louis had a smug expression on his face.

''But it had the library stamp.'' Zayn couldn't resist.

''Zayn,can you ever not interrupt me? '' He threw his hands,Zayn slumped in his seat.

''Thank you.'' He continued.

''So,he snuck into the library. Don't ask.'' He shook his head.

''And well he got the book stamped .And well here it is .'' A click resounded in the car as Louis opened the dashboard revealing a copy of The Da Vinci code,sitting there in all its royalty.

''Oh my God.'' Zayn gasped. He leaped over from his seat hugging Louis with all his might.

''Zayn!I'm driving.'' Louis tried to balance the car,startled by the sudden affection.

''Thank you so much.'' Zayn retreated back to his seat. A huge smile etched on his face.

''It was nothing .'' Louis shook his head,a fond look on his face.

''I promise.I'll repay you for this .'' He took the novel from the dashboard,clutching onto it happily.

''Well then,I'll just wait for it.'' The interest in his cerulean eyes,clearly evident.

''Anyways,wheres the douche today?Why were you walking?'' And That was all it took for Zayn's elated mood to drop.

''Because I wanted to.'' He placed the book into his back pack,trying to avoid eye contact.

''Okay ,and why'd you ever want to walk in this weather?" He looked at him briefly,before turning back to the road.

"because....i just did." Zayn shrugged.

"Okay,then you are not as smart as I thought you were." A frown made its way onto Louis' forehead.

"Maybe,I'm not." He tried to sound indifferent,looking towards the window. He stroked his fingers around the condensed fog,making a little heart on it.

"And what do you mean by that?" He wrote his name this time,completely distant.

"Nothing." He tried again to distract the attention.

"Zayn,now I've tried coaxing it out of you. Are you gonna tell me whats wrong?" Zayn was still looking at the window,which was covered with small doodles everywhere.

"Its nothing...." He wished Louis' would drop the matter.

"Zayn." But he should've known he was stubborn.

"I don't know,Louis. Everything." He wiped his hand over the window,wiping out everything he made.

"Hey!" Louis pulled onto his shoulder,trying to get his attention.

"Do you ever wanna just shut down. Just switch it off?" He looked at the older lad with a much emotional intensity.

"Switch what off?" Louis' voice was uncertain. His nose scrunched up,in confusion.

"Yourself?" Zayn whispered almost to himself.

"Zayn,where's this coming from?" Louis looked concerned,almost to the verge of scared.

"Nowhere,I'm just really down today." Zayn shook his head,feeling bad for piling up his non-sense on Louis.

"Zayn." Louis looked at him completely as they parked.

"I'll be fine ,Louis. I'll just have to start over." He let another little detail slip out of his mouth.

"Will you come to the play ground today?" Louis' voice was hopeful.

"It's Monday" Zayn said.

"Do you have a ride home?" He said as Zayn got out of the door,turning to look at him.

"Yes, I'll just go with Liam. He'll drop me off. Thank you so much,Louis. I owe you big time."

He said meaning every word of it. Louis only nodded,the concerned look still on his face.

Zayn started the walk to his classroom. The nostalgic feeling of someone walking beside him,nudging him every now and then. But every time he looked beside him,he was greeted by the intense nothingness,instead of the tall presence of his brother.

Zayn was lonely but one thing was for sure. He had people looking out for him, He just needed to cherish the right ones.

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Hi guys,

So I had this big test today and I knew I wouldn't have been able to update this. So,I bribed my sisters who then took turns to type the entire thing out. It took them really long and when I reread this I kinda wanted to kill them. So this is sorta edited and Now I'm really tired.

So don't forget to tell me how you liked this.

Was it cute? I tried making it cute.

Zouis is so my OTP right now. Love it.

Also PILLOW TALK!!!!!

Vote.Preach.Comment.Love Zayn.

And remember that I love you all.

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	15. ۱۴

Harry was determined.He was going to talk to his brother.

Since the weekend,it was like Zayn was gone. As if he had never returned back from Cheshire. As if he was still living with their father,while Harry tried everything in his power to bring him back. As if he was paying the price of their parents broken relationship. As if he was still being sacrificed. As if Harry had failed.

It reminded Harry of the time when Zayn was not living with him. Reminded him how every single thing in the house shouted Zayn to him. The doodles on the walls. The pictures on the staircase. The height mark on his door. The box of fruit loops sitting untouched in the kitchen cabinet. The stacks of his drawings in their mothers drawer. The memories of him laughing about something while sitting on the island. Watching TV in the living room. Laying in Harry's room cuddling up to himself. All the memories. And that was all Harry had left of him. Just the memories. 

And that scared Harry more than anything. It scared him that he was going to have to live with the memories. Just the memories.

The green eyed lad had gone to such lengths to bring his brother back and Unfortunately he was the one who had lost him. Harry remembered the struggle he had to go through to get back to Zayn and he was scared of that struggle. No matter how strong he showed himself to be,he wasn't sure if he could go through all of that again. And knowing that he was the one who lost Zayn,it made everything hundred times harder.

Niall was right he should've tried to look at things from Zayn's perspective. Now that he was,everything was different.

He should've known better though. He should've known that this was the only result he was going to get. After all,he had always been too stubborn to talk things out and Zayn had always been too uncomfortable with such conversations. The raven haired lad had always avoided it,accepting anything life threw at him,never questioning its ways. He never asked why his parents were fighting,just accepted it and went along with it. He never asked why he had to go away with his father. Never confronted anyone. Even if it was Harry. That is why the older lad should've known that Zayn was never going to ask him why he was mad at him. Not because he was enjoying the space but because he had accepted it.

Come to think of it,It was all Harry's fault. He was the one at wrong,the one with a misunderstanding. He should've been the one to ask Zayn and not the one who misunderstood every move that the younger lad made,thinking of it as a part of a big conspiracy. He should've slapped himself and reminded himself that it was Zayn he was thinking about. Conspiracy wasn't a word in Zayn's dictionary. He was too transparent to make every single thing about a big notion behind it. And as Liam said 'he'd never disturb Harry' let alone deliberately hurt him.

Harry wanted to beat himself up. He was so blinded by rage that he couldn't see through his brother. He had always claimed to know Zayn the best,always the one who knew what he was going through. Unfortunately,in that moment everyone else knew Zayn better than him and he was too stubborn to acknowledge that. Too stubborn to see things clearly. Too stubborn to figure Zayn out,when he wasn't even trying to hide anything. Just too stubborn to see Zayn through.

It wasn't like he hadn't wanted to talk to Zayn. Actually,the only thing on his mind since that Friday,the day he had ruined everything,had been to talk to Zayn. In fact,he had tried talking to him a couple of times. However,every time he mustered up enough courage,thinking about what Niall told him or about Liam's words,either Zayn hadn't been home or if he was home,he had been sleeping. And eventually Harry thought about all that he had said and how hurt Zayn must have been and how he wouldn't want to see him. And well,he didn't talk to him.

He was indeed a coward.

He had always been like that. Ever since he was a little kid,he had to be pushed to make amends. Even when he knew he was wrong,it was hard to get out an apology from him. It wasn't a matter of ego,not at all. He just always hurt the other person too such extent that he was ashamed to face them. He'd sit there drowning in guilt,while others thought he felt no remorse.

He always need a little motivation,an assurity that the other person would forgive him and not hate him forever. That things were still fixable. But if he didn't acted up right then,things would get real ugly real soon. 

It had always been his mother. Always making him realize that if you love someone,apologizing to them shouldn't be that hard,especially if he was the one who hurt them. If you make someone feel bad,you should be able to make them feel better. And if you can do that with just some simple gestures then why the hell not. She always had a way with her words. They worked every time and that time was no different.

Harry had been sound asleep,when his mother had approached him that morning. She stomped straight up to his bed,pulling the covers off of him with a sudden jerk.

"Okay,tell me what's going on or I'll take your bloody car." She said straight forward. Her tone was stern.

"Mom?" Harry stretched his face,his mind still a bit fogged up. He grabbed onto the cover,snuggling into it.

"Harry,your brother has been walking to school and it's freezing outside." He groaned as she pulled the covers again,leaving him completely exposed to the cold. " He spends the entire day at Liams house and is dead asleep when I come back from work." She paced around the room,pulling onto her hair. " It's 7 pm Harry! and he is a teenager! I'm so worried about him." the concern evident in her tone.

"Mom." Harry sat up,rubbing his eyes to get the sleep out of his eyes.

"He's my baby and I just got him back." She had a distant look on her face and it made Harry more awake. The curly haired lad was aware of his mothers guilt over Zayn. She had always blamed herself for it and Harry hadn't been of much help. In his frustration, he never realized what he was doing to his mother,blaming her for everything that had happened. Even though he knew,she was the one who stood up for them and decided to get the divorce. It was never easy for her. After all,it was her husband that had turned into a beast. It was her life that was turned upside down,by the storm of life that left behind a broken family. A broken family that she had to mend.

"Is he gone?" Harry rubbed at the back of his neck,awkwardly. 

"He's not in his room." She huffed,exasperated. "I want you to tell me what exactly happened and don't say nothing." She warned him,her finger raised in the air.

"I screwed up!" He threw his hands up in defeat. She looked at him,her eyes urging him to continue.

"I was mad at him and I was yelling but I didn't knew he was listening and now he's gone." He explained the best he could.

"Oh,Harry." She slumped onto the bed,her posture defeated.

"I'm sorry mum." He said without even thinking. The disapproving look on her face was just too much for him. It made him feel more remorseful.

"I'm not the one you should say sorry to." She looked at him,her expression stiff. 

"I know but I don't know what to do." He whined,getting out of the bed.

"Well,you better figure out cause if he gets sick,I'm going to kill you." And There wasn't a part of Harry's mind that didn't believe her. With that she got up and turned to leave before stopping in her tracks.

"I'm going to be back early today. I'm going to text him to come back home. And if I come back to see that he isn't home or he's asleep. I'm taking that car of yours." She nodded at her own words before turning back and leaving the room.

And that was one of the reasons why he was searching around the school for his little brother. He had looked everywhere from the classrooms to that little playground. Zayn was no where to be found.

"Harry I think you should let him have his space. That's all he needs." Lori said from besides him. Harry turned a little to look at his girlfriend. Concern shone through her face.

"Lori,I just need to talk to him once." He assured her,placing his hand on the small of her back.

"But.." She continued,a frown on her face.

"I have to talk to him,Lori." He said more sternly this time. 

"Okay,Just turn towards the lockers. I need a book." She shrugged,turning towards the other side.

"Can we not?" Harry stopped in his path,looking at the front door,where he suspected his brother to be.

"I need it Harry. I've got homework. Come on its going to take a second. Besides he might be there." She took his hand and practically dragged him to the hallways.

"Okay,just make it quick." Harry said,annoyed. They turned towards the lockers and were greeted by a crowd gathered around Harry's locker.

"What's going on?" He frowned. Everyone looked at him,pity clear in their eyes. He pushed through them all to look at the locker. And he realized why they felt sorry for him. It was a drawing of him. Harry was hundred percent sure that Zayn had made the drawing. The soft strokes and the details that only he could grasp were evident on the page. They were his signature. His wording. And Harry could spot them anywhere. The pitiful thing was that the drawing was torn to pieces,which were then taped to his locker. The 'I hate you too' written on it with a striking red. Harry felt his heart drop.

"Oh my God,Harry. I'm sorry I didn't know he hated you this much." Lori gaped,one of her hands covered her face. Harry shook his head still trying to get it through his head.

"I promise he didn't do it. He was with me the entire time. He didn't do it." It was Liam. The brown haired lad was jumping up and down,trying his hardest to make Harry believe his words.

"But it clearly says he did!" Lori yelled out,clearly agitated.

"He didn't do it. Zayn wouldn't do it." Harry didn't even registered his words as they flew out his lips. It was very convincing,if he had looked at it from his own perspective. But fortunately he didn't. He looked at it from Zayn's perspective. As far as Harry knew,Zayn would never tear his drawing deliberately. The younger lad cried once when Harry had accidentally ripped one of his doodles,tearing his own perfected drawing was not an option for him. And Zayn never used the word 'Hate'. He'd never say that he hated someone,even if that person was his father. So,there wasn't even a little chance for him to use it,let alone for Harry. Also Zayn wrote his 'I' without capitalization. So,whoever tried to copy his writings obviously didn't do it right.

"He didn't do it! Wait what?" Liam stepped up to defend his best friend before realizing what Harry had said. Lori looked at Harry,as if he had grown another head.

"Liam where is he?" He asked the younger lad,clutching onto the pieces of the torn drawing.

"He went home." Liam let out simply.

Harry nodded at him before running to get to his brother.

If Harry had any doubt about talking to Zayn before,they were definitely gone. He was going to talk to his brother and fix everything before it got too late. He was sure now that Zayn wasn't conspiring against him but someone else was. And Harry wasn't going to let that someone ruin his most important relationship. 

..........................................................................................................................................................................

"Zayn." Zayn turned to look at Louis who was standing at the corner of the swing. Happiness bloomed itself in his chest. He waved him over to where he was sitting on the grass,his legs wet and numb.

"I've got something for you." He smiled at him,as brightly he could. Louis came up to him,placing himself on the ground beside him.

"Fuck its cold!" He jumped,as his body contacted with the ground. Zayn laughed at him,getting a piece of paper out of his bag. He gave the paper to Louis,his brown eyes urging for him to open it.

"Are you okay?" Louis' question was pretty basic but the emotion that his tone held,said a lot more.

"Yeah,I'm fine. See,I drew you." Zayn nodded at him. Pointing at the page in Louis' hand.

"Zayn,let's get inside it's cold." Louis cupped his face with his hand. Zayn grabbed the hand from his chin and rubbed on it.

"No,you have to see it first." He shook his head,adamant.

"Okay." Louis withdrew his hand from his grasp,opening the piece of paper carefully. The paper unfolded to reveal yet another beautiful piece of art. It was a detailed sketch of Louis' wearing a similar dress to the one the older lad had drew Zayn in. Louis as an elf. It was beautiful.

"It's you." Zayn smiled at him,pointing at the drawing repeatedly. Louis looked between the drawing and Zayn before pouting.

"Aw.Now I feel bad!" He whined.

"Why?" A frowned placed itself on Zayn but it did not alter the energy in the lads posture. 

"Cause When I drew you it was crap and this...It's amazing." Louis said ,honestly.

"I know because it's you." The frown on his face long gone,replaced with the radiant smile.

"Zayn let's go inside." Louis tried to divert the attention from his blushing state.

"No everyone's.." Zayn tried telling the older lad,completely oblivious to his state.

"What?" Louis urged him to continue.

"That drawing. Harry. Everyone's looking at it." He said simply,the smile on his face softening around the edges but still there.

"Do you want to talk about it?" The older lad asked,hesitantly.

"No.Not now.I want to stay Happy." Zayn shook his head,fervently,jumping up a little.

"Zayn,Harry..." Louis tried telling him but he was adamant.

"No,Louis. Just tell me you like it. Tell me what you like about it." Zayn pointed at the drawing,his eyes wide with hope.

"Zayn you could've drawn me a line and I would've loved it. This is exceptional. " With those amber eyes looking at him with such anticipation,he could do nothing but oblige to his wish.

"Thank you." Louis needed to get used to the sudden affection,or he'd die every time Zayn hugged him out of nowhere.

Zayn pulled away from the hug and just looked at the older lad. 

Zayn could always pretend he wasn't hurting. Pretend it to the point where he started believing it and with Louis smiling at him like that, it wasn't that hard,anyways.

..........................................................................................................................................................................

Is it weird to feel proud when I reread this thing? This is already at 30,000 words and I think we're almost halfway through. OMG! I'm officially a fan of this thing. I never realize how good the script is until later when I re read it and I'm like OMG I wrote this!

Okay so little proud rant over and well It's not nice to say good stuff about yourself anyway. 

So what'd you think about this chapter?

Harry's Pov!

Also Zouis! That part in History MV where Zayn's ruffling Louis' hair. I think I died.

*cries*

Also guys I just realized that I don't have to force writing out of me anymore!! Woohooo.I'm just irrationally happy today! Yes that happens.

Kudos.Preach.Comment.Love Zayn.

.............................................................................................................................................


	16. ART WORK

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/32/6d/f8/326df8bddfd1a94a5bd451bf55bc5f00.jpg

Hi guys,

Yeah I know this is not an update and I'm really sorry about it. I was supposed to update today but my mind wasn't helping and then when it finally was I had the stupid test to work on. Now I have it all written but I have to type it out and I'm really dizzy. I don't know why. I'm just gonna head to bed. There's a stupid test tomorrow and well there's a chance that I'll update if I'm not too knackered. Just gonna have to bribe my sisters again. Also this beautiful thing was gifted to me by 'BlueEyesOfNialler' she's my 12 year old sister. I think she got fed up of me telling her the story again and again and well this was her way of shutting me up. Worked well though. It's not her best but I still love it.   
Tell me what you think about it and well keep me in your prayers.

Love.Sara.xx


	17. ۱۵

Zayn pulled onto the strap of his backpack, looking around skeptically.

"It's in your head ." He tried to reassure himself.

The raven haired lad had been walking home when he felt as if he was being followed.

Terrified, he had looked back, sighing when he saw that there was no one behind him.

"In your head," He repeated one more time to himself before he started walking again.

Zayn really wanted to believe that it was just the irrational paranoia and he was imagining things again. However, the goosebumps on his back and the fear creeping up his neck told him otherwise.

Every muscle in his body was tense with fear, ready to act waiting for the certain signal.

He wanted to run all the way back to home, but he could hardly walk under the weight of his bag. So running was not really an option. And he didn't want to trigger anything. So he kept on walking at his normal pace, trying his hardest to seem oblivious to the supposed presence. Yet, the dread pooling at the bottom of his stomach made it really hard for him to not turn back and look if there was someone or if he was finally going mad.

The raven haired lad focused on his peripheral vision trying to spot the aura but turned his gaze back to the road when he almost stumbled on a rock. Fixing his posture, he tugged on to the strap of his backpack, nervously.

"You used to call me on my cellphone..."

Zayn screamed, jumping almost a feet in the air, utterly startled by the ringtone. Haphazardly, he got his phone out of the pocket, groaning at the caller ID.

He took a deep breath, placing one of his hand on his chest and picked up the phone.

"Hello," He breathed.

"Don't hello me. You lied to me! Again!" Zayn flinched at the loudness of his voice.

"Louis, " He looked around himself, the intense feeling of fear creeping up his neck.

"You said Liam was going to drop you off. Liam does not even have a ride home, himself!" The older lad yelled, clearly not ready to hear him out.

"Louis !" Zayn said, his voice urgent.

"What?"

"I think someone's following me." And that was all he was able to say before the phone was being snatched from his grasp.

Startled, he screamed.

"I don't think you're gonna need this anymore. "

His stomach dropped as he heard the voice. Zayn wanted to run but his legs were frozen to the spot. He was so scared that he couldn't move, even if he wanted to.

"She forgot to tell me you were this pretty." The smile that came on his face made Zayn's toes curl. The man was big, almost two heads taller than Zayn. He had eagle-like features, a smirk plastered on his face. Zayn dropped his bag, taking a hesitant step back.

"No, baby boy. You don't have to be terrified, this could be fun if you want it to be. " His breath hitched as the buff man took two steps toward him.

"You know what? Such pretty things like you shouldn't be walking out like this. Alone, on a deserted road." He gestured towards the road which was indeed deserted.

"What do you want?" Zayn tried to seem confident but, unfortunately, the stutter in his voice gave him away.

"Oh, come on are we really gonna play at this game?" The buff man mocked amazement, placing both of his hand on his hip.

"Please, " Zayn pleaded, his voice drenched in panic. The man chuckled.

"Begging already?" He shook his head, an amused smile on his face.

The next few moments were a bit of a blur for Zayn. He shrieked as he felt himself being scooped of off the ground and pressed to the wall.

"Get off! Help! " Zayn screamed, thrashing against the strong grip. He knew that it was impossible for him to fight the beast off but still he was persistent. He kept kicking his legs and clawing away at everything that came in contact with his hands. Tears pooled in his eyes as felt the monstrous hands roaming over his torso, exploring his body without his permission.

"Stop fucking squirming!" The man yanked him from his hair before smacking his head on the wall. Zayn screamed halting in his movements.

"That's like a good boy. " He breathed into his neck.

His actions stirred something in Zayn's head. The hot air breathing down his neck. The harsh kisses marking him, relentlessly. The roughness of the hands exploiting his body. Everything was painfully familiar to Zayn.

It took him to the time where he was being straddled by his own father, as he pleaded for him to stop. He had struggled against his grip, as the old man kissed him roughly on the lips until they were bitten raw. Zayn had cried for mercy but his father was ruthless. The older man had beaten him up until he was completely pliant. Ironically, his body was so used to the beatings that they didn't affect him, anymore. So, when his father thought he had passed out, Zayn had knocked him in the head with the lamp on his bedside. Trembling, he had managed to get out from under the massive weight, literally crawling up to the attic. That was one of the worst nights of Zayn's life.

"I am sorry, Dad. Please don't do it! " He yelled impulsively.

"Dad? Now you're just asking for it." The chuckles that followed the statement made his insides curl. Zayn wailed loudly as he felt the monstrous hands slither down to his lower regions. He slammed his fist against his chest, trying to prevent the imminent torture, not ready to accept his fate.

The younger lad was too scared to comprehend the loud thud that resonated throughout the street. He was too engrossed in the memories that he didn't realize that the hands were off of him. The flashbacks were so overpowering that he could still feel the rough hand on his skin, exploiting his body without his consent.

"Zayn?" Louis called out to him but all Zayn heard was the moans that had left his father's lips.

"Please don't do it, Dad. I swear I'll be good." He whimpered, oblivious to the boy looking at him. Louis took him by his shoulders shaking him until he felt him coming back to the surface.

"Zayn!" He yelled, concerned. Zayn blinked his eyes, the trance lifting off of him. He looked at the boy in front of him, pushing out a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding.

"Louis! " He wailed, throwing his arms around the other boys neck. Zayn cried. He cried like he had never cried before, letting all his emotions lose. He cried to the point where it got really hard to breathe and every single gulp of air felt like daggers being stabbed in his chest.

"Zayn." Louis pulled back from the hug trying to inspect the state Zayn was in. The younger lad was struggling to breathe, one of his hand pressed to his chest. Louis placed his own hand over the smaller one on his chest, rubbing it softly trying to soothe the evident pain.

"Zayn." He cupped his face with both of his hands, forcing him to look at him. Zayn couldn't feel his hands, all he felt was the immense fear. The fear that he hadn't felt since he had came back home. The fear that he was sadly accustomed to. The fear that he had forgotten but was painfully reminded of.

"Zayn! " Louis' voice was urgent. He panicked not knowing what to do. Louis had reached out to him, trying to calm him down but nothing worked. Zayn was unresponsive and Louis couldn't do anything about it. He shook his shoulders hard, lightly slapping him on his cheek but Zayn kept crying. It was like he wasn't even there.

"Zayn, please don't hate me," Louis shook his head at his own words. Taking a deep breath, he placed his lips on Zayn's softer ones. They were exactly like he had remembered soft and full.

For a second there, it felt as if he had made the biggest mistake of his life. Zayn was completely frozen to his place, all the motion in his body halted. The older lad felt as the blush crept up his neck, he was truly embarrassed.

Louis was about to pull back when he felt the soft lips reacting to his kiss. He wasn't insensitive to the situation but he just couldn't help the triumphant feeling that spread under his skin.

Even if it was initiated out of sheer panic, the kiss was memorable. It was soft and caring, the emotion behind it evident. Zayn had calmed down completely giving into the kiss.

Louis himself had started to loose to the kiss when he decided to pull back. Zayn was in a vulnerable state, he didn't want him to think that he was taking advantage of him.

Louis looked at the younger lad, hesitantly. Zayn's breathing was almost back to normal and it seemed as if he had calmed down enough.

"Home?" He simply nodded wrapping his arms around himself. Louis' turned to pick up his bag and his phone from the ground.

"Zayn?" He turned to look at the younger lad staring at the man on the ground. Thankfully, Zayn reacted to his voice diverting his gaze from the unconscious body to him. Louis' heart ached as he saw the fear in those brown eyes.

"Zaynie?" Louis walked back to him.

"He's not getting up. Knocked him too hard. " He gestured to the bat on the ground. Zayn looked at the bat and then at him, a small smile gracing his lips.

 

It was a bad day and Louis was worried about Zayn. Things were not okay but that smile made him believe that everything would be fine. It just needed time.

+

This is kinda short and I am kinda not so sure about this but I seriously had to update and Also love you all for the comments on the last chapter. I swear it's just some days I wake up and I kinda can't do anything. Also, I have two tests in a day and so I am kinda busy keeping my grades up. It's so unfair!

Don't forget to leave feedback.

Kudos.Read.Preach.Leave feedback.Love Zayn.


	18. ۱۶

Harry wasn't exactly good at talking.

The curly haired lad had always been a moment of spur kind of guy. Words were more like an impulse for him. They'd just come to him in a certain moment, motivating him enough that he'd let loose, blabbering out most of them. However, if he couldn't say it at that exact moment, he'd over think it and then he'd never be able to say it. The words would be sucked out of him, leaving a hollow emptiness behind.

Harry hated that feeling.

But, it was nothing compared to what he felt when he had all the right words bubbling out his lips but no one to say them to. The jitters wouldn't calm down poking at his skin, reminding him of the situation. The anticipation bubbling in his stomach, as he imagined different scenarios of what was to come. Those were the most agitating days of his life.

Harry knew it was going to be one of those days when he had come back home and there was no sign of Zayn. He knew it when he saw the blue backpack missing from its usual place. Yet, clutching onto an unlikely spark of hope, he had searched for his younger brother, up and down everywhere in the house but he was not there. The curly haired lad had contemplated calling him but was fearful that he'd loose control and say it all. Harry needed to apologize to Zayn face to face. He just couldn't do it over the phone. He needed to see for himself as he made things right. He had screwed up big time and he needed to fix it the right way. And that was just not possible over the phone.

When Zayn didn't come back till 4, Harry thought that his brother must have gone over to Liam's. But when he saw the text his mum had sent him, he started freaking out.

'I texted Zayn, he was still in the school. He should be home in a minute now, talk to him! '

03:50 pm

Harry frowned at the time. He knew Liam was not dropping Zayn off because he had left right around the time Harry had left. A wave of dread passed his body. If Zayn was walking home, what was taking him so long.

"Where are you, Zayn?" He sighed looking at the clock one more time. Harry was worried, he knew Zayn never lied to their mom, so according to her text, he should've been home more than an hour ago.

The curly haired lad grabbed his jacket and car keys, turning towards the front door. He placed his hand on the door knob, but before he could turn it, he heard the bell ring. Relief washed over him, giving him hope that it was Zayn on the other side of the door.

Harry jumped as all the words as they started bubbling up again. He felt the corner of his lips twitch up forming a small smile. Zayn was home and Harry was going to be able to talk to him. He would finally say it all, tell his brother how wrong he was and that he was genuinely sorry.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the door.

"Zayn." His voice was laced with hope.

To say that harry wasn't ready to face what waited for him on the other side of the door, wouldn't be that wrong. He blinked his eyes a couple of times, not ready to believe the sight.

It wasn't Zayn that he saw first, it was Louis. The cerulean eyed lad, who usually had a mischievous expression on his face was looking at Harry with such urgency that enemy or not Harry wanted to help him. He was about to ask him what the matter was when his eyes landed on the figure in his arms. It felt as if Harry's heart had been shredded to pieces. There in the arms of the man he hated was his younger brother. Zayn's face was hidden in Louis' chest, his arms and legs limp around his figure.

"Zayn?" It slipped out of his lips like an instinct. It felt as if time had stopped for Harry. He couldn't help but think of the time when he saw Zayn tumbling down the stairs like a ragdoll. Reliving the fear that suffocated him when he sat beside his body as blood pooled around it.

"Will you fucking let us in or are you just gonna stand over there?" Louis' shrill voice brought him back to reality. Still a bit shaken, Harry took a step back making space for the brunette to step in.

"Zayn." He followed his steps to the living room.

"Okay, Zee. I'm going to put you on the couch, Yeah? " Louis whispered placing Zayn on the couch, carefully. "Sorry. " He visibly flinched at the little cry that left Zayn's lips. Harry noticed how different Louis was with Zayn, careful and soft.

The brunette turned to look at him, concern evident on his face. It felt odd, the soft expression contrasting with Louis' sharp features. Harry wasn't used to it. In fact, he was so accustomed to the malicious smirk that he always saw on Louis' face, he never imagined to see him any other way.

"I think he hit his head. Doesn't seem concussed, though." Louis told him, slumping on the couch beside Zayn. Harry walked towards his little brother kneeling beside him.

"Zayn. What happened? " The curly haired lad touched the bruise on his cheek, tentatively. His heart broke when the younger lad flinched away from his touch clenching his eyes shut, the agony clear on his face.

"Hurts," He mumbled softly opening his eyes. Harry felt his heart crumble at his brothers defeated tone. He was about to get up and search for the first aid kit when his eyes landed on Zayn's neck. A hot wave of anger rolled out in his stomach. Sloppy bruises covered the tan skin on his neck turning it purple and blue.

"What the fuck happened to him? " He breathed through his nose, failing to keep his composure. Zayn looked at him a tired expression on his face. Louis got up, placing both of his hands on his hip.

"Harry," Before the brunette could continue, Harry grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, shaking him roughly. The curly haired lad couldn't control his anger. His little brother was hurt and there were hickeys on his neck, nothing could calm him down.

"What the fuck?" Louis pushed onto his chest, trying to get away from him. Harry was blinded by rage, yelling and pushing him as he thrashed in his grasp.

"Harry!" He halted in his movements to look over at his brother. Zayn looked disappointed. Harry loosened his grip on the shirt, some of the anger dissipating off of him. He took a deep breath, carding a hand through his hair.

Zayn shook his head lightly before speaking. "Louis you should go." He looked at his friend, remorse clear in his eyes.

"Are you gonna be fine?" Louis sat down next to him, taking his hand in his own. Harry needed to let off some steam and Louis was making it really hard for him to not murder him right there and then.

"Yes, I'll see you soon," Zayn reassured him, squeezing his hand a little. Harry suppressed the scoff that bubbled up his throat, coughing lightly reminding them of his presence.

"Okay." Louis got up, straightening his clothes. Harry looked away as he placed a quick kiss on Zayn's forehead before turning to leave. As much as he was thankful to Louis' for bringing Zayn back, he just didn't trust him enough.

When he heard the front door close, Harry looked back at the couch, his heart aching at the sight. Zayn was trying to stand up, wincing with every single move. One of his hands was clutched onto his side as he tried to balance his weight on the other one.

"Zayn!" Harry rushed to help his brother before his legs would give out and he'd fall. He took his arm carefully placing it over his shoulder before wrapping his own arm around his torso. "Let's get you cleaned up." They slowly moved towards the kitchen, where Harry sat him on the island, conscious of the soft sounds of pain that left his lips.

"What happened? " He rummaged through the cabinets before finding the first aid kit.

"Got jumped. " The nonchalance in his statement was alarming. Harry placed the box beside him getting a flannel from the cabinet.

"Who? " He dabbed it in the water, rubbing it slowly on the bruise on his face. Zayn flinched tensing in his position.

"I don't know, don't really care," He whispered. Harry stopped to look at him for a second before rinsing the clothe again.

"Tommo said you hit your head. Where?" Zayn turned his head pressing into the scalp on the back of his head. Harry wiped the blood off of it cleaning, exposing the cut to the air.

"It's not that bad. Your gonna need ice for it." He pressed onto the cut one more time before Zayn turned his head, a weary look on his face.

"Zayn." Harry tried to start the conversation. He did want to say it, to say all the words that he had thought about and repeated in his mind but he wasn't sure if Zayn was up for it.

"It's fine, Harry. I am fine." He sighed at the words. Zayn was doing it again. He was trying to reassure himself that he was fine when he actually wasn't.

"So, why was Tommo there?" Zayn's eyes snapped up at that. He looked up at him with such sentiment, that Harry almost wanted to take back his words. Harry turned towards the sink washing the flannel. A sick feeling crept up his skin as he saw the blood running down the drain. Zayn's blood.

"Cause he doesn't hate me." Harry froze. He knew they were going to have this conversation but he never thought it'd go down that way. He looked up at Zayn completely taken aback.

"I was mad at you, Zayn. You know me. I never meant what I said." He tried justifying his actions.

"Why." Zayn scoffed. Harry gaped at him. He had never witnessed Zayn behave in such a way.

"Just because." Harry tried to form the words as Zayn looked at him expectantly." of reasons." He looked down flustered.

"Reasons.?" Zayn's tone was accusing. Harry looked up at him, frowning.

" I don't know Zayn.You know what happened." He shrugged, walking to the fridge to get the frozen peas.

"No, It's not. I woke up one day and you weren't talking to me." Zayn yelled, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"It's not like that" Harry tried, placing the pack on his head.

"It is!" Zayn pushed his hand away, throwing the peas on the floor. " You don't talk to me. You don't wanna see me. You said that you hated me. That I wasn't your brother. That I should've stayed with dad and You didn't even gave me a reason." He breathed heavily.

"Zayn." Harry walked towards him.

"What'd I do Harry!? What'd I do?" He hid his face in his hands, as sobs began ripping out his body.

"You said you wanted space Zayn, That's what I was giving you." Harry let out defeated. He did not know what to do. Zayn wouldn't stop crying and Harry wasn't sure if he wanted to be consoled by him. The younger lad rubbed at his face, giving Harry an incredulous look.

"I did?" Sarcasm dripped out his tone. Harry felt as if he was trapped. He wanted to tell Zayn that he was sorry but the urge to justify his actions was just too strong.

"You said you'd walk home. You moved back to your room. You didn't say a word when we walked together. What more do I need to say? "

"Harry, I thought you were mad at me!" Zayn yelled at him, his face red with exertion.

" You were deliberately trying to make me mad. Hanging out with the douchebag, pranking me with him, hugging him!" Harry didn't even knew what he was saying anymore. He had wanted to tell Zayn that he trusted him and he was wrong but his lips weren't helping him. It was like they had a mind of their own, saying whatever they pleased. He knew why it was happening. It was because of all the times he should have talk to Zayn and he didn't. All the words he had thought then were jumbling in his mind now and he just couldn't help but say them.

"At least, He cares about me and wouldn't believe such bullshit!" Harry felt his heart drop at the bitterness of his voice.

" I hate him, Zayn," He said it before he could've thought about it.

" You hate me too Harry, does that make a difference?" Zayn chuckled, tiredly. Harry felt a sharp pain in his chest.

"But." He wanted to tell Zayn that he didn't hate him but the guilt clawing at his throat made it hard.

"How can you believe that I'd do that all that to you?" Zayn broke down completely. " You pushed me, away. Stopped talking to me when I needed you the most." He hiccupped clutching onto his side. " You know? I had a run in with school drug dealer. I lost my library book. Someone drenched my locker in a grape juice. Tore the drawing I made. And I almost got raped..." He rasped out, defeated.

" Zayn. " Harry felt a tug at his heart as he looked at his brothers state.

"Where were you, Harry?" He cried, his tone accusing. " You know why I hang out with Louis? " He wiped away at his tears, trying to compose himself. " cause he's there every time I need him." He sniffled. " He cares enough to help me without asking anything in return. " His smiled a little, his eyes distant. "And If it weren't for him, Mum would've found my body broken and frozen on the street. " He concluded.

"Zayn.." Harry sobbed a warning hinted in his tone.

"What Harry, It's true." Zayn nodded his head, emphasizing his point. " It's true. "

"I'm so sorry." Harry wrapped his arms around Zayn, letting himself loose. He felt as Zayn's figure vibrated against his chest. He let his own tears run freely, not bothering to wipe them away. What Harry felt couldn't be listed off as just remorse. He was shameful. He hated himself for what he had done to Zayn. It was his fault his brother was in such a state and he hated himself for that.

"I'm so sorry Zayn. I'm so sorry." He placed a kiss on his forehead, saying the words he should've said long ago. " I'm sorry for being such an inconsiderate bastard. I'm sorry that I believed in all that crap. I'm sorry that I stopped talking to you and I'm sorry that you had to face it all alone." He swallowed the lump in his throat, trying to complete the conversation. "I'm sorry that I didn't try to see it from your perspective. I don't deserve you. I don't. God, I am so sorry." Harry cried letting the sobs rack through his body.

He was responsible for it. For every thing Zayn had to go through, Harry was to blame. If he hadn't been so caught up in his ego, he would've seen it earlier but he didn't. Harry was scared that he had ruined it. That he had caused Zayn more harm than he had done him good. That Zayn didn't trust him anymore.

But Harry was a stubborn lad. He was going to fix everything and he was going to do it right. 

+

Hi, lovies.

It took me so fucking long to type this out and well at this point I don't even know what I've written. Hope its okay. I think this is long. Well I don't know.

Don't forget to leave feedback. 

Sara xx


	19. ۱۷

Harry sighed looking at his younger brother. His eyes were close, deep dark circles around them. Shallow puffs of breath left his lips, reminding Harry to check his inhaler. Zayn hadn't slept the entire night, waking up every ten minutes screaming to be left alone. Harry had felt a forceful tug at his heart when he realized that Zayn didn't felt safe in his own house. He had brought him to his own room, the second time he heard the screaming. Harry did not care if Zayn didn't want him around, all he knew was that his brother needed him and he was not going to leave him alone in that state. 

He stretched the covers tucking Zayn's body further, his movements soft conscious not to disturb him. He kissed Zayn's temple, petting the hair on his forehead.   
What had he done? How had it lead to this? He did not exactly know. But what he knew was that he was going to fix it. He was going to make Zayn felt safe again. He was going to make sure that it never got to that point ever again.  
" Um. " The knock on the door alerted him to the third presence. He straightened his posture, diverting his gaze to the door.   
" Your mom said I could see him. " Louis scratched at the back of his neck, nervously. Harry wanted to turn him back from the door but he couldn't erase the fact that it was Louis who brought Zayn back to him. He saved him from something bad when Harry couldn't.  
" He's sleeping." He breathed, looking back at the body on the bed.  
" It's fine. I just wanted to check on him. Is he okay?" Louis walked in, placing the backpack beside the wall. Harry looked at the bag, a sad smile on his face.  
" Oh, I forgot it in my car when I dropped him off yesterday." His gaze shifted from Harry to the bag. Harry just nodded his head, guilt sparking in his body.  
" Yeah, I'm sorry about. " Before he could even complete his sentence, Louis waved his hand in the air shrugging it off.  
" It's fine. I get it you were worried about him." He mumbled, his gaze landing on Zayn. Harry felt something peculiar when he saw the concern in Louis' eyes. His arch nemesis, the guy who never failed to embarrass him, was concerned about his little brother.   
" He wouldn't tell me what happened." Harry looked at Louis, hoping that he would tell him. The brunette shifted his gaze to him, the softer expression on his face changing into something darker.  
" I don't know how to say it." He rubbed his foot on the ground. Harry felt nervous knots forming on his sides.  
" He said that he was going to leave with Liam and so I let him go." Louis' head dropped and he smiled lightly. " Should've known he just didn't want to trouble me. " His eyes were distant, the smile still presents on his face. " So I called him. I was yelling at him and he told me that someone was following him. And the call disconnected." He breathed deeply, fear sparkling in his eyes.   
" What happened? " Harry said impatiently. The knots kept bundling, gradually reaching up to his ear nodes. Louis looked at him, helplessly.  
" He was screaming. " He visibly shivered at the memory. " This man. " his voice spat venom. " He had him pinned to the wall and-and .." He gritted his teeth unable to complete his sentence.  
Harry shook his head, pushing a hand through his hair roughly.  
" Who was it! " He tried keeping his voice low. Waking Zayn up was the last thing he wanted to do.  
" I don't know. He was older, big. I've never seen him around. " Louis shook his head emphasizing his point.  
Harry breathed through his nose trying to keep himself calm. The anger he felt was overpowering but he couldn't let it get to his head. He had to find a smarter way to sort the matter and he needed to be in his senses to do that.  
" Who could do that to him? " He looked at Zayn, who slept oblivious to his surroundings.   
A sad smile graced his lips, Zayn didn't deserve it. He was too good for it, any of it. He deserved to be praised, to be appreciated, to be cherished. He deserved every single good thing life could give him. He deserved better, way better.  
" Is he okay?" Louis tried to walk towards the bed.  
" He hasn't slept the entire night, please don't disturb him." Harry let out as softly as he could. No matter how hard he tried, he just couldn't allow himself to let Louis around Zayn. The brunette looked at him a small smile on his face. Harry wanted to ask him why he was smiling but he didn't have to.  
" You know I never understood why he talked so highly of you. I never understood how he couldn't see the egotistic douche in you but now I get it. " He placed his hands on his hip, smiling fondly at the little memory.  
Harry wanted to be offended about the 'douche' part but surprisingly he felt nothing but a slight warmth in his chest.  
" I know I'm going to regret this and your gonna hate me even more. But I just have to say it. " He looked at Louis as he continued. " I know you don't hate him. I know. But he thinks you do and it breaks his heart. "  
" I ..." Harry tried but Louis shook his head.  
" You don't get it. You mean so much to him that," He waved his hands animatedly. " That if he had to choose between you and the entire world, he'd choose you. And I know that you'd do the same." Harry frowned at the firmness of those words. " You know I thought I knew you very well. One of those guys who have an ego so big they can't see anything except for themselves. But your not. You have an ego so big that you see what you are doing and you regret it but you don't fix it."   
" Cause I don't know how to!" It slipped out of Harry's mouth before he could swallow it. He looked at Louis' face expecting to see the amused expression he was used to seeing on him. But instead, he was greeted with an expression full of empathy.  
" If you try to put yourself aside for a moment, you'll see how much he needs you. And you'll know what you were doing wrong when you see it. " Louis' voice disappeared at the end of the statement. Harry wanted to say something but the firmness in Louis' words left him speechless.  
" Will you tell him, I came over? " Louis rummaged through his pockets to produce a phone. He extended his hand to Harry giving him the phone. It was Zayn's phone. Harry took the phone, nodding slightly.  
" I'm just gonna go and if you can get over the weirdness of this all, try to think about what I said. " Louis turned in his tracks retreating out the door.  
Harry kept looking at where the boy had been standing, the words playing in his head. Harry was lost, since when did everybody else know Zayn better than he did. Since when did Tommo know Zayn better than he did?  
He shook his head lightly, walking back to the bed sitting beside Zayn. A heavy sigh escaped his lips.  
" I need you more, Zee." 

+

Hi,

guess who was free today? ME! I haven't revised anything since last night and I feel so good! 

How many of you remember why Louis' so sure about Harry? If not it's cause of the time when he climbed up that bloody window. Remember?

Also, this is like short but I dunno I wanted to give guys something and this is it. And I've got like a week before I go on semi-hiatus so I'm gonna try to give you as much as I can before that. Everyone who's worried about my exams, I love you guys. :)

Don't forget to leave feedback.

Vote.Comment.Preach. Love Zayn.

Saraxx


	20. ۱۸

Zayn squirmed under the tentative fingers on his face. He blinked his eyes open, trying to adjust them to the surroundings.  
" Zayn." His mum breathed out. Her eyes were soft, a sad expression on her face.  
"Mum." He sat up with a jerk, clenching his eyes shut when he felt the dizziness wash over him.  
" What is it?" She panicked. " Where does it hurt?"   
Zayn waited for the feeling to pass before opening his eyes to look at his mother's worried face.   
" It's fine." He tried smiling at her but was stopped by the bruise on his face. Instinctively, he reached for the source of pain touching it softly.  
" Don't touch it. It's gonna get worse if you touch it." She pulled his hand away from the bruise. He looked as her eyes roamed over his body, a pained expression coming over her face.  
" Tell me what happened. " She cupped his face with one of her hands, her eyebrows knitted with concern.   
He diverted his gaze to the floor. Zayn did not want to tell his mother what happened. He, himself, was having a hard time accepting it. The last thing he wanted was for his mom to be worried about him.  
" Zayn." She pushed his chin up, forcing him to look at her. " Please, baby." She pleaded.  
Zayn breathed heavily, blinking his eyes shut. He knew there was no way he could get away from it. He was going to have to tell it to his mum. After all, it was not one of his dreams, it was the cruel reality that the dreams reminded him of.  
" I got jumped," He mumbled, looking directly into her eyes. He wished that there was a way he could explain it all to her, without having to put it in words.   
" Who was it?" She gave him a knowing look, trying to coax it out of him.   
" I don't know." He said, truthfully, shaking his head.   
" What does that mean?" She gave him an incredulous look, a frown set on her forehead.  
" I mean," He started but was interrupted.  
" He is not from here." Harry was standing beside the door. A soft expression on his face. " Tommo, said he hadn't seen him before." He walked into the room, stopping beside the bed.   
" Louis?" Zayn confirmed, a huge frown on his face.  
" Yeah. He came over, left you this." Harry handed him the phone. Zayn frowned at him, utterly confused. Since, when did Harry talk about Louis with such calmness.  
" We are going to report this." He jerked his head back to his mother.  
" What?" He let out, scared. Talking to an official about what happened was the last thing he wanted to do. He didn't want to talk about it at all. He wanted to forget that it happened and move on.  
" Yeah. I'm not going to let him get away with this." She said, decidedly.   
" But mum." He pleaded, anxiety pooling in his stomach.  
" Zayn, she's right. We have to tell the police. " Harry nodded his head, his hand on his hip   
" Mum," He whined. They did not get it. If he talked to the police he wasn't only going to tell it to them but he was going to admit it to himself and he didn't want to. It was too painful.  
" Zayn, he was going to." She breathed heavily, unable to complete the sentence. " I won't let him get away with this. I can't!" She shook her head, adamantly. Her eyes fierce and determined.  
" But I don't even remember his face." Zayn exasperated, throwing his head back. He could feel the tears pricking at the corner of her eyes. He honestly didn't remember his face, all he remembered was those monstrous hands. Even in his dreams, it wasn't his face he saw. It was his father's.  
" Tommo does. He could," Harry suggested, his eyes soft with concern. Zayn let the tears loose, wincing slightly when the came in contact with the bruise on his cheek.  
" But," He shook his head, furiously.  
" Zayn." His mother called out to him, her tone pleading.  
" I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to..." He kept shaking his head, till it started hurting his neck and he felt dizzy.  
" Babe, you don't have to." Harry approached him, placing his hands on his back, trying to stop him.  
" No! I know it's hard. But you have to stop it the first time or else it'll continue on." Zayn swallowed the lump in his throat, taken aback by his mother's outburst. She stood up, pacing a little. " He'll think there are no consequences of what he did and then he will do it again!" She yelled, a pained expression on her face. Zayn could see the tears in her eyes. He knew what she was contacting it to. His father.  
" Mum, I'll do it. " He tried to reach her, getting off of the bed but tumbled when nausea hit him.  
" Zayn," She screamed, reaching out to him before he could fall.  
" I'll do it," He mumbled again placing his hands on her arms.  
" He hurt you, Zayn. I can't let him get away like this." She placed him back on the bed, settling the pillows behind him.  
" We'll talk to the police. I'll tell them. I'll call Louis." He continued on trying to reassure her. A small smile came to her lips.  
" Thank you." She placed a kiss on his forehead, wiping the tears from his face. " I'll call officer Brady." She nodded at him before leaving the room.  
Zayn looked at Harry who still stood beside him. His elder brother was looking at him with a fond expression on his face.  
" You should call.." He coughed a little before continuing " him."   
Zayn was still confused about his brother's sudden decent treatment towards Louis but he didn't question it. He nodded slightly, dialing Louis' number.   
" Zayn!" A smile crept up his lips when Louis picked on the first bell.  
" Hi, Louis. " He scratched his head, awkwardly. It was strange for him to be talking to Louis in Harry's presence.  
" How are you?"   
" I am fine. I." He breathed heavily, trying to find the words to explain it. " I need you to come over."  
" Are you okay?" He could almost picture the frown on Louis' face.  
" Yeah, I." Zayn started again, pressing at the knots bundling in his chest. " Mums calling the police. She wants me to file a report. I don't remember. " He swallowed, biting his lower lip." His face." It came out more sheepish than he had intended.  
" I'll be there in a few. See you, Zaynie." Zayn sighed as the line dropped. He placed his phone on the table, feeling tired even though he knew he had a long day ahead of himself.  
" Is he coming?" Harry sat in front of him, his head down.  
" Yeah," Zayn said.  
" How is the pain?" Harry looked up at Zayn, his green eyes filled with concern.  
" It's fine," Zayn said. His gaze landed on a the drawing in Harry's hand. It felt like his heart had been scratched out of his body. It was his drawing, the one he had found taped to Harry's locker. He felt his heart drop at the sight of it, remembering the pain he had experienced when he had found it ripped to pieces, with the harsh words on it.   
"I didn't do it." It slipped his lips, instinctively. Harry looked at the drawing and then at him, a soft expression on his face.  
" I know." Zayn swallowed all the defensive words that bubbled up his throat. A confused frown on his face. " You'd never ruin a drawing." Harry smiled at him. " And you'd never use the word hate." A slight happiness bloomed in Zayn's chest, the corner of his face twitching up forming a smile. " I tried to fix it." He took it from his hand, inspecting the glue marks on it. The happiness blooming in his chest increased making him smile bigger.  
" Listen, Harry. I," He started to say, remembering all the harsh words he had said to his brother the other night. Zayn opened his mouth to say something better than 'I'm sorry' but he was not able to say anything.  
" No, Zayn. I deserved it. Every word." Harry shook his head, the smile disappearing from his face  
" I just snapped," Zayn said, truthfully. He hadn't meant to say that stuff to Harry but it just came out.   
" You did not. You were right. And I." Harry stopped shaking his head slightly. " I am really sorry. I am." He blinked his eyes, breathing deeply. " I am worse than dad."  
" No, you are not, Haz." Zayn was quick to contradict his statement, shaking his head trying to emphasise his point. Harry might be a lot of things but he was nothing like his dad.  
" I hurt you, Zee and I didn't even realize it. I said I hated you. I don't hate you. I hate myself. I was so scared of losing you that I lost you. I believed what they said because I was scared that you would find better people than me and you would leave me behind. And because of my insecurities, I pushed you away and that was the biggest mistake of my life." His voice disappeared, tears shining in his eyes." You should not forgive me. I don't deserve it." Zayn wanted to say something but Harry started talking again. "But I want you to know that I need you more than anything in this world and I do not want to lose you. " he sniffled, wiping his eyes.  
" Harry." Zayn leaned over to his brother, wrapping his arms around his neck.  
" I am sorry, Zayn. I am so sorry." Harry wrapped his own arms around him, leaning into his brother's embrace.  
"Your nothing like dad. You are not like him." Zayn shook his head, in his neck.  
" I am a monster." Harry breathed through the tears.  
" No, your not. You hurt me, you did. But you didn't do it intentionally. You weren't happy because of it. You didn't want to see me suffer. You didn't do it. You are not a monster. You are nothing like dad." He rubbed his back trying to calm him down.  
" I love you, Zee." Harry pulled back, placing a soft kiss on his forehead.  
" I love you, too." Zayn wiped the tears from under his eyes, smiling at the fond expression on his face.   
"Okay, now lay down. You need rest." He settled back on his pillows, taking the drawing in his hands. He looked at it, a frown on his face. The tears in it were hidden behind the thick coat of glue and it was still perfect.  
A spark of hope lighted itself in his chest, maybe he and Harry could be like that. They were torn but they could be glued back together and they'd be perfect

+

Hi guys,

If this is the worst chapter ever its cause I fell asleep twice while writing this. You have the permission to kill me. And if it's blah. It's cause I am blah. right now.

Vote.Preach.Comment.Love Zayn.

Love. Sara xx


	21. ۱۹

Louis stood beside the window his arms crossed in front of his chest, a meaningful smile on his face. He had reached the Styles residence, approximately, an hour ago and there was still no sign of the police officer. Not that he minded, it gave him more time to talk to Zayn, the only problem being his elder brother who was watching them like a hawk. Every time Louis tried to come even remotely close to Zayn, Harry would motion him away. The curly haired lad would stare at him with such intensity that Louis would have to back off just to lighten the pressure on his neck. Previously, he had thought that he liked the overprotective brother in his nemesis but now that he sees the practicality of it, he couldn't be so sure.   
" I think officer Brady's going to be late." He turned to look at Harry, who was now sitting on the bed beside Zayn.  
" Oh is he?" Louis scoffed, slightly rolling his eyes. Harry's gaze shifted towards him, the anger lighting his eyes. He shook his head, before looking back at Zayn.  
" Do you want me to get you something to eat?" He said, his tone softer this time. Zayn shook his head, opening his mouth to say something. " No, Zaynie. You have to eat. No excuses. I'm gonna get you something." Zayn only sighed before nodding, defeated.   
Harry hopped off the bed, passing me a stern look before leaving the room.  
" Wow, does your brother hate me or does your brother hate me?" Louis placed his hand on his hips, a contemplating look on his face. Zayn chuckled at that, a small wince escaping his lips.  
" You tell me. I think he's doing way better." He coughed a little, pressing on his chest.  
" Yeah, I suppose." Louis tilted his head and shrugged. " Anyways, now that he's gone. How are you doing?" He walked over towards the bed, taking Zayn's face in his hands. He traced the bruise on his face tentatively, flinching when the younger lad winced in pain. " Sorry." He moved to the back of his head inspecting the cut on his scalp. There was still a little swelling around it but no signs of infection. Next his eyes travelled to the harsh bruises on the crook of the boy's neck, a sudden feeling of rage pricking at his skin.   
" Louis." He diverted his gaze from his neck to his face, his heart swelling at the soft expression on Zayn's face. The corners of his mouth twitched up to form a bright smile. Zayn had that effect on him, he only wanted to smile and be happy when he was around him. " I am fine."  
" Do you say that a lot?" Louis couldn't help but say.  
" I just don't want you to worry about me." Zayn dropped his gaze to his lap, his tone sheepish.  
" Hey," Louis pushed his chin, forcing him to look at him. " You don't want me to worry about you right?" He tried for to keep a stern composure, but the determination in those golden eyes and the furiousness of the nod was making him melt inside. " Then promise me one thing, if you don't have a ride home, you call me, okay? You never walk home, never. Promise?" Louis nodded, emphasizing his words.  
" I promise." Zayn nodded, a soft sparkle in his eyes. The sight was so adorable that Louis couldn't help but place a quick kiss on his cheek.  
" So, is it weird or its just me?" He turned immediately, avoiding any sort of awkwardness. He walked back towards the window, pulling it open with a jerk movement. " This is exactly where I first saw you." He looked back at Zayn. The younger lad was sitting up a bit more in his position, his eyes shining with glee.  
" Yeah you scared the shit out of me." He breathed, muffling a cough with the back of his hand. Louis slipped the window back, retreating back towards the bed.  
" I scared the shit out of you? You scared the shit out of me! " He pointed at Zayn, accusingly. " I was just going on about my routine and then bam! There you were, looking at me." He said dramatically, his voice coming out even shriller.  
" It is actually funny. I thought you were a thief. I was literally choosing between screaming at the top of my lungs or waking Harry up but then you screamed and well..." Zayn rambled on before he was interrupted.  
" Wait, what?" Louis looked at him incredulously. All that his mind could process was 'thief' "You thought, I?" he started, his tone stern. " Me?" He pointed towards himself " This face?" He waved his hands around his face. " Was a thief!"  
" Well, you were in my room and I had never seen you before. " The younger of the two shrugged, trying to defend himself.  
" You were in Styles' room and I had never seen you before but I never thought you were a thief!" He yelled, huffing out annoyed.   
" But." Zayn only smiled, amused.  
" I'm offended." Louis crossed his arms, looking away from Zayn.  
" Louis." He pleaded, an amuse tinge to his tone.  
" No, I just can't get over it! You thought I was a thief. Couldn't you have think of something else?" Louis pouted, slumping on the bed beside him.  
" Like what? That you were the tooth fairy?" Zayn giggled, and suddenly Louis forgot all about the matter, too absorbed by the sweet sounds leaving Zayn's lips   
" Well, it's better than a thief." He mumbled, softly.  
" I'm sorry, Louis. " Zayn kept giggling, a genuine happiness covered his face.  
" Well, can't resist those eyes of yours, anyway." Louis breathed heavily, throwing his head back laying himself on the bed horizontally, his legs still dangling over the edge.  
The door opened, signalling that Harry was back, Louis knew he should've moved from his place but he didn't budge.  
" What are you doing?" Harry looked at him, perplexed.  
" I'm laying on the bed," He said, nonchalantly.  
" Well get up I need to put the food where you are laying." He knitted his eyebrows together clearly agitated.  
" When is that officer coming again?" Louis huffed out getting off of the bed, stretching his arms over his head.  
" He's not gonna be able to make it. Did you know Kevin Hale?" Harry asked to no one in particular.   
" Yeah, high Hale I know him, what about him?" Louis narrowed his eyes. Everybody knew high Hale, he was the only person in the school that didn't give a fuck what other people thought. He was open about everything, from being gay to smoking weed and was never scared of getting reported and for some odd reason, people never told on him.  
" He's dead." Louis jerked his head towards Harry, his eyes widening.  
" He's dead?" Disbelief evident in his tone. He couldn't believe it, he had seen high Hale a day ago and it was strange to know that he was dead.  
" I think that's exactly what I said." Harry retorted.  
" But How?" Louis eyebrows furrowed.  
" Drug overdose. His body was found in the school hall, apparently there were a couple of people who were there but he just couldn't handle it and he died." Harry sat beside the tray on the bed, cutting the toast into smaller pieces.  
" How the fuck do you know that?" Louis frowned, scrunching up his nose. Bradford was not that big of a town and every news spread like fire on hay, and Louis was aware of that. What the cerulean eyed lad actually, meant was how did he not knew that before Harry did.  
" Its all over the news. There's gonna be an investigation and well they're going to ask every single student of the school and there's gonna be the drug test and they are expelling people. " Harry jerked his head giving Louis a pointed look. Anger bubbled in the older lads stomach.  
" Why are you looking at me like that? I don't fucking do drugs!" He yelled, stomping his foot on the ground. Fury glazed his eyes, that was one of the reasons Louis despised Harry, the prick was too judgemental.  
" Good then." Harry turned his attention back, he took a fork and started preparing a bite for Zayn. Louis breathed out slightly some of the anger in his bones, dissipating when he saw Harry feeding Zayn.   
" What the fuck does that mean? " But he was still Louis Tomlinson he couldn't just let it go. Harry stopped in his movements looking back at Louis, a scowl present on his face. Louis glared at him with such intensity that his eyes watered.  
" Are you guys gonna stop?" They were both alerted out of their glare match to look at Zayn, who was coughing a bit more now. Harry took the cloth in the tray handing it over to Zayn. The younger bloke pressed it to his mouth coughing out the rest of the food.  
" You okay?" Louis said concerned. Zayn drifted his gaze to look at him, blinking his eyes as assurance.  
" I'm fine, I think it's acting up a little." He breathed through coughs. Harry leaped over to the drawer drugging out a blue inhaler.   
" Thanks, Hazz." Zayn took it from his hand, breathing out completely before placing it in his mouth. There was a little swish sound, before he pulled the inhaler out, clamping his mouth shut. Louis looked at him the entire time focused on every movement. The older lad wanted to be able to learn how to do it as a precautionary measure. He shifted his eyes away, rubbing awkwardly at his neck as he saw Zayn blushing. The younger lad had caught him staring, making them both a tad bit embarrassed.  
" Zee, you said you had a run-in with the drug dealer?" Louis looked back as Harry questioned his brother. Zayn frowned a little, a distant look in his eyes.  
" Yeah, that time in the hallways. You said someone was selling coke." Louis urged him to speak. Zayn looked at him, his eyes big and innocent.  
" Yeah, I was lost and we'll I kinda passed the janitors closet and we'll she was.." He was interrupted.  
" She?" Harry questioned, incredulously.  
" Yeah, it was a girl. She was yelling at him that if he did not have money he wasn't going to get any coke." Zayn was blushing clearly flustered by the topic they were discussing.  
" And?" He urged him.  
" And he said he'd tell the school about her and she said that nobody would believe a druggie. He was calling her something I can't remember her name." He scrunched his eyebrows together, racking his brain for the name. " Flora, no it wasn't that." He shook his head. " Fanny, no what? Why would I say that?" He smacked his head, slightly. Louis smiled at him, the cuteness too much for him.  
" Florence?" Harry muttered, his eyes wide, a huge frown on his lips.  
" Yeah, that was it! How did you know, Harry?" Zayn jumped a bit in the air, wincing back to his place, a huge smile on his face. Louis smiled at him but the expression on Harry's face told him it was not going to be anything to smile about.  
" Styles?" Harry snapped his gaze towards him, before looking back at Zayn.  
" Are you sure, Zaynie?" He asked, urgently. Zayn's smile faltered a bit, yet he nodded, fervently. Harry nodded back, dropping the fork on the tray and passing a hand through his hair.  
" What is it, Styles?" Louis couldn't help but ask. He wanted to know what was perplexing Harry and if it was related to the drug dealer or not. Harry did not look at him, instead, he looked at Zayn. He pushed away the tray, coming closer to Zayn.  
" Zee, you can't tell anyone about this. Anyone! Okay!" Louis frowned at his words.  
" But why? If they want to interrogate me, Shouldn't I tell them?" Zayn frowned at him, the remnants of happiness dull on his face.  
" No, I am going to do something. Okay?" Harry nodded his head emphasising his point.  
"What are you going to do?" Zayn asked him, confused.  
" Make it right." Harry sounded determined.  
" I'm sorry but you do know Styles, that we don't live in your head. We don't know what's going on there. Elaborate please." Louis scoffed, pointing at Harry's skull.  
" It is Lorri. Her full name is Florence. She may be the drug dealer." Harry breathed out. It felt as if Louis had been exposed to the harsh winds of December.  
" What the fuck." 

+

Okay, I wanted this to be the cutest thing ever but I kinda got interrupted. This was supposed to be up yesterday but we had guests and they were pestering me. Also, Zaynie is a flower princess now and I swear I screamed so hard. I so love him and well me mum doesn't like him anymore. :(

Don't forget to leave feedback.

Preach.Vote.Comment.Love Zayn.

Love,

Sara xx.


	22. ۲۰

Harry buckled up his seat belt looking over at his brother in the passengers seat. Zayn had a tired expression on his face, the bruise on his face already yellowing, remnants of sleep radiating out of his posture. Harry smiled as the younger lad tried his hardest to keep his eyes open, stretching his face, blinking continuously.

" You know what, Zee?" He tilted in his seat to directly look at him. Zayn turned his head slightly, stuffing a yawn with the back of his hand. " Let's skip. Mum wouldn't mind."

" But, Hazz we can't just skip school. That's not right." He breathed in, his head lolling on his neck.

" Come on, Zaynie. I'm really tired. I don't want to go." Harry faked a yawn, trying to convince his brother. He knew that Zayn wouldn't agree to it just because he was tired. He would probably shrug it off with an 'I'm okay' and keep telling it to everyone including himself until he would pass out from exhaustion and Harry really did not want that.

" But you seem fine." Zayn rested his head against the seat, closing his eyes a bit. Harry resisted cooing at the sight. The curly haired lad was tempted to tuck Zayn in right there but he knew that his brother was stubborn and he wouldn't agree to that.

" Zaynie, please." He tried again, pouting a little. Zayn opened his eyes, sitting up in his position.

" But Harry what if there is something important that I miss? I can't miss school, Harry. If you're tired, you can stay. I'll call Liam." He yawned again, rubbing his eyes slightly. Harry had always liked that Zayn was a smart lad and wanted to keep up with school work but in tat moment he couldn't be so sure.

" Okay, it's fine. We'll go." He sighed, almost giving in.

" Good, love you Hazzy." Zayn turned in his seat to snuggle up into himself as much as he could. Harry looked at him, a soft smile on his face. He had to think of something and he had to do it soon. He couldn't let Zayn go to school like this, it was almost cruel.

He reached his hand to turn on the radio, a smile creeping up his lips. Harry rarely got struck by ideas, but when he did they were always useful. He opened the dashboard fumbling through some CDs until he found the one he wanted.

'I should ink my skin with your name /And take my passport out again'

Harry tried to be as casual about it as possible, trying his hardest not to look at Zayn, who was already becoming loose. He drove towards the school, keeping the speed as steady as he could.

" Hazz, I think I said too much to the officer." He jerked his head to the source of the voice, his heart swelling at the sight. Zayn's body was completely lax, his mouth slack, eyes shut, head lolling from side to side. This was exactly why Harry didn't want for him to go to school. A sleepy Zayn did not only mean a tired, sleep deprived, clingy baby but also a vulnerable, no-filter Zayn who wouldn't think before talking about everything and anything.

" No, Zee. You said what was required." Harry diverted his gaze back to the road. He reversed his car carefully, not wanting to alert Zayn of his intentions. Fortunately, the younger lad was too sleepy to comprehend anything around himself.

" But I told him that he said that 'she never told him that I was pretty'." He blinked his eyes open, only to shut them eyelids too heavy.

Harry felt his heart clench in his chest. It was very hard for Zayn to talk to the police officer. At one point, it felt as if he would shatter completely. The raven haired lad was shaking so much that Harry had to take him in his lap to make him still so he could talk properly. Even then, most of the words came out in the form of breathy puffs followed by coughing attacks and if Harry hadn't been there to decipher it all, no one would've known what Zayn was saying. It wasn't easy on Harry either, he didn't know the entire story and hearing it from a devastated Zayn wasn't exactly a treat for him.

" Don't think about it too much, Zaynie. We're gonna get him and I'm gonna kill him." His hands clenched on the steering wheel, knuckles turning white. " Okay? " He turned his head to look at Zayn.

A smile graced his lips, all the anger lifting itself off of his shoulders. Zayn was asleep, his face peaceful, little puffs of breath leaving his lips. With one of his hands still on the steering, Harry adjusted his head so that it wasn't dangling off the seat but was on the head rest. Affection bloomed in his chest, as Zayn turned in his seat trying to get into fetal position. A slight frown came upon his forehead as he struggled against the seat belt, clearly confused about his whereabouts. Harry couldn't help but chuckle. He turned his head towards the road, relieved to see his house in the line of his vision.

'Maybe I fell in love when you woke me up.'

Harry parked his car in the garage. Getting Zayn out as gently as he could, he walked into the house. The smile permanent on his lips. For brothers, they were very different from each other but one thing they had in common was stubbornness. Hollow stubbornness. Zayn was so tired but he still insisted on attending school. However, just a little push in the form of his favorite Ed Sheeran song was all it took before he was melting away in his dreamland. In a way Harry was exactly like that, keeping up his stubbornness as his shield against the world. When all he needed was a little assurance that not everybody was out to get him.

" What are you doing?" Harry was so occupied in trying his best not to wake Zayn up that the voice kind of startled him. He flinched back, a little shriek escaping his lips.

" Mum!" He shook his head, trying to get rid of the jitters under his skin. His mother was standing there in the living room, all dressed up for work. She had a puzzled expression on her face until her eyes landed on Zayn and it softened into something more like concern.

" Is he alright?" She walked over to them, her lower lip tucked under her teeth, a huge frown on her face.

" Yeah, just tired." Harry looked back at Zayn, who fortunately didn't show any sign of disturbance. He was sleeping peacefully, not an ounce of tension on his face.

" Do you think..?" His mother looked at him, guilt shining in her eyes. Harry knew what she was implying, she had been the one to force Zayn into filing the report and after witnessing his state as he retold the incident, she wasn't sure if it was the right decision.

" Mum, it had to be done. He's fine, just worn out. We couldn't have left the matter like nothing happened. We needed to do it. He needed to do it." She nodded at his words, a sad smile gracing her lips.

" Put him in my bed. Feed him good. I'll try to be back sooner. Okay?" Harry nodded, trying to reassure her. " Love you both." She placed a kiss on Harry's forehead and then one on Zayn's before leaving through the front door.

As instructed Harry placed Zayn on his mother's bed, tucking him nicely. He kept the door open so he could watch him as he cooked in the kitchen. Putting on his apron, he started preparing the best breakfast he could, the smile still evident on his lips.

Harry wanted to remind Zayn that even if they weren't that big and lasting, there were little moments of happiness that made life worth living. Like when they were little and everything was clearly bad but they had their moments which made everything better. He wanted to remind Zayn that he was there for him.

He was about to mix the chocolate chip in the pancake batter when Drake's voice alerted him. He walked to the room, picking up Zayn's phone from where he had placed it on the table.

'Louis.' It said.

Harry groaned slightly, picking up the phone for fear that it would wake Zayn up.

" Hi, Zaynie." He almost cringed at the shrill voice.

" Zayn's sleeping, what do you want?" He walked out of the room, keeping his voice low.

" Oh, hello to you too, Styles. I just wanted to know how he was doing?" Louis chirped, sarcasm dripping out his tone.

" He's tired and sleeping so bye." Harry almost hung up right there but was stopped by Louis' yells.

" No, wait I want to talk to you." Harry covered his ear, making a distasteful face.

" Me?" He said incredulously.

" Yeah, you! Don't worry I can't wrap it around my head either. But it's your girlfriend." Louis lowered his voice.

" What?" Harry questioned.

" She's the one who ruined Zayn's locker." He scrunched up his nose, still perplexed.

" What?" He repeated his statement.

" I've been trying to find the person behind it and it's her." Louis said, his voice calm.

" No, she was with me when it happened." Harry clearly remembered it.

" Of course she was." Louis scoffed.

" What does that mean?" Harry let out almost offended.

" That means, that she is a pro at her game and she wouldn't just do it herself. She was with you so that she could have an alibi and what alibi can be stronger than her being with you." A knot of suspicion started forming itself in Harry's stomach.

" How are you so sure? I've been trying to find something about that drug dealer thing for the entire weekend and I couldn't get anything." He didn't know why he was telling it to Louis but he was.

" My sources are never wrong, Styles. She did it." Louis' voice was Stern and unwavering.

" Why would she do that?" Harry questioned it mostly to himself, confused by the sudden information.

" That's what I need you to find. She's your girlfriend after all." And he was right, she was Harry's girlfriend. Yet from the past couple of days it felt as if Harry had been dating someone entirely different from who he thought she was. " Bye, Styles."

And with that Harry was left all alone with his thoughts. Who was he dating? Who was his girlfriend? Lorri, the girl who would give the world up for him or Florence the potential drug dealer who was trying to make Zayn's life hell. Maybe they were the same person and one of them was just a facade, but which one was the question. It was actually pretty clear but Harry just couldn't accept the fact that he had been dating a girl who held such cruelty in her heart, for the past year. Or maybe it was just him, he was the one who was blind after all, Zayn was not there to guide him, to be his light. Come to think of it, everything had started becoming clearer with his return. Harry should've seen it earlier but he was too high on his horse to see the reality that was the ground beneath him.

He walked back to the kitchen, resuming his work. Memories invaded his mind reminding him of the day that was to come. He should've objected it that first time in the car when Lori told him that Zayn felt 'suffocated' by his presence but he was too scared of losing Zayn, that he never thought that Zayn would never use such word. Everything after that just happened on it own accord, Lori's words playing a big part in blooming the misunderstanding into something much closer to hatred.

Harry sighed realizing how much he had lost in the confusion, he had almost lost Zayn and that was enough reason for him to retaliate. He had a plan and he was going to work his way smartly to it and if Lori was behind it all, she was going to regret it. Regret it all.

" You cheated Harry. " He was alerted out of his train of thoughts by the accusation. He looked up to see Zayn standing at the door, rubbing his eyes with the back of his sleeves. A coo bubbled up his throat at the adorable sight, the pout on Zayn's lips growing.

" What are you talking about?" Harry replied, smoothly getting back to work.

" You know what. You cheated me into sleep." Zayn walked in, his arms crossed in front of his chest.

" No, you fell asleep and I brought you back." Harry suppressed the smile that fought itself to his lips.

" But you put on Wake Me Up!" Zayn stomped his feet on the ground, the pout still present on his lips.

" And ironically, you fell asleep." Harry chuckled, stacking the pancakes on a plate.

" but," Zayn sighed heavily.

" Do you not like spending time with me, Zaynie? Harry mocked hurt, frowning. He knew the only way they were going to stop arguing about it was manipulation and with Zayn being Zayn it was the easiest thing ever. A feeling of triumph washed over Harry as the pout on Zayn's face melted away leaving behind a frown, his arms loosened themselves from his body, giving his entire image a softer look.

" No, Hazz. I didn't." He reached out to Harry, shaking his head. " I love spending time with you." The genuineness in those amber eyes made something swell in Harry. He placed the plate on the island, reaching up to Zayn and embracing him in a much-needed hug.

" I know and that's why you are going to eat the entire plate of pancakes." Harry smiled at the groan that left Zayn's lips.

" But that's just too much. I'll explode Harry." Harry pulled away, picking Zayn up and placing him on the island.

" No, you won't!" He shook his head, already cutting the pancakes into small pieces so that it would be easier for Zayn to eat them.

" What's with you and this island? Why can't we eat in the living room or on the table?" Zayn said exasperated, Harry stopped cutting the pancakes giving Zayn a knowing look.

"Maybe because the last time we did that, you ran away before finishing even half of your food. So no. We are sitting here till you complete at least half of it." Harry said, sternly.

" but Harry it's too much," Zayn whined, slumping in his position.

" We can play video games after that!" Harry smiled at the way Zayn's eyes widened and a huge smile came on his face. He almost jumped off the island, the excitement clear in his actions. Harry placed both of his hands on his knees, keeping him from falling down and hurting himself.

" Yeah?! Can we play Tekken?" Zayn said, biting his lower lip in anticipation.

" Yeah, we can play whatever you want." Harry chuckled at his excitement. Happiness sprouted itself in his chest.

" Can I be Jin?" Zayn asked him a hopeful look on his face.

" Only if I get to be Hoawrang." Harry took the pancake in the fork, feeding it to Zayn who was too occupied thinking about the video game.

" No! I wanna be Hoawrang! We can play teams! I'll be both Jin and Hoawrang and I'll kick your butt!" Zayn nodded his head cutely, a smirk present on his face.

" Okay, then I'll be Paul." Harry fed him another bite of the pancakes, a smile present on his face.

" No, I'll be Paul and Yoshimitsu and Eddy and Jacks and Kazuya and.." He smiled as the younger lad counted all the best players on his fingers, frowning when all ten of them were over and he had a long list of players left.

" Zayn, you can't take all the good players." He mocked annoyance.

" I'm not, you can be Nina or Christie or Asuka." Zayn covered his mouth trying to keep the bits of food from flying out.

" But they are all girls!" Harry huffed out.

" Exactly, I don't like them but they ar good at fighting and well you can be them!" Zayn's eyes shone with amusement as he chewed onto another piece of the pancake.

" Fine but I will be Asuka, at least, her boobs are a bit covered." Harry complied. With the choice of words he used, the curly haired lad was sure Zayn was going to either hit him or make him wash his mouth with soap. But he was pleasantly surprised when he felt the skinny arms around his neck, holding him tightly.

" I missed you, Harry." Harry's heart swelled at those words, becoming so big that he was afraid it might explode.

" I missed you too," He said, truthfully. It was all he had done. No matter if he was angry, torn or guilty, he had missed Zayn at every single stage of it and he never wanted to go through it ever again. 

+

Hi, guys. So, well I don't know. Tell me what I wrote and what you loved about it. This should've been up on valentines but it was a lame day and I decided to sleep the entirety of it. And so I made this extra long.

Zarry is back! Lorri is going down! (BTW I always forget the spelling I wrote for he name and well Yeahh, I think its different in every chapter.) And well there was no Zouis in this chapter but I felt like writing it and so here you are. Don't forget to tell me what you thought and where'd you think this is going. And How'd you like my username?

Preach.Comment.Vote.LoveZayn.

Saraxx

+


	23. ۲۱

"Liam!" Zayn jumped up to his friend. Liam turned from his locker to look at him, a small smile gracing his lips.

"Zayn? " He frowned slightly when the shorter lad took him from his shoulders shaking him roughly.

" Guess what? " Zayn said animatedly, a huge smile etched on his face. Liam chuckled at his best friends antics.

"Mr. Rigsby told you about the art competition right?" He giggled as the smile on Zayn's face faltered leaving behind a small pout. The shorter lad hit him playfully on his chest.

" You knew about it! Why didn't you tell me?"

" Whats fun in that?" He smirked, amused.

" I need a new friend! " Zayn crossed his arms against his chest.

"Shut up." He chuckled hugging his shorter friend.

" No, I don't hug hurters." He squirmed in his embrace.

" God Zayn! " Liam released him, throwing his hands in the air. Zayn chuckled at him before turning to leave.

" Where are you going?" Liam asked him.

" To sketch." He kept moving backwards still looking at his friend.

"Well, say Hi to Louis for me." Liam shook his head at the surprised smile on Zayn's face.

" I will." He looked down biting on his lower lip, the embarrassment clear on his face.

" Hurter." Liam tsked. " Stupid Stella."

+

Louis smiled as he heard the steps coming closer to him. He turned his head to look at him, his heart swelling at the sight. Zayn had a huge smile on his face, as he skipped towards where Louis was sat on the ground.

"Louis!" The older lad was taken off guard as he jumped right into his lap.

" Woah, what's got you so excited." He placed his hands around his torso, unintentionally bringing him closer to himself.

" Mr. Rigsby, my art teacher said he wanted me to display my sketches in the interstate art competition. " His amber eyes sparkled with excitement, the smile constant on his face. Louis felt as if he was looking at the sun, too bright for the plain eyes like that of his.

" That's so cool!" He smiled at the younger lad, bouncing him a little on his lap. A warm feeling exploded in his intestines as Zayn giggled clutching onto the collar of his shirt.

"I'm so happy! Now I'm gonna start practicing them!" He shuffled off of his lap fixing himself on the ground beside him. Louis looked at him fondly as he took his sketchpad and pencils out. He felt himself smile as Zayn pouted slightly when he could not decide between all the pencils. This was the Zayn Louis lived for, the one right before him arguing to himself about the pencil either being too blunt or too soft. With his lower lips stuck out and his tongue peeking out of his teeth, he was a sight for sore eyes. Louis kept looking at him too entranced to pull away his eyes. " Why are you looking at me like that?" And even that question didn't pull him out from under the spell.

"Love that smile of yours. Keep it." He mumbled deliriously, grazing his teeth on his lower lip when he saw the blush creeping up to Zayn's cheeks. The younger lad dropped his head before looking back at him, flashing him with one of his toothy smiles, making Louis feel like a melted ice puddle. " See, that's what I am talking about! With that smile, you don't even have to draw anything. You can win away the world, with just that."

" You are making me blush. " Zayn looked away, the smile still plastered on his lips.

" Yeah, I can see it." Louis kept on with his rambling. He couldn't account for what was coming out of his mouth. It was like he was loose, and there was no filter in the link between his brain and mouth.

" Stop it! " Zayn hid his face behind his arms, his cheeks flaming red.

" Aww Zaynie. Don't hide your face. I really like seeing it." Louis pried his skinny arms away from his face, his insides melting at the shyness dripping off of Zayn's posture. The raven haired lad turned his face away from Louis trying to hide in his own shoulder, his sketch pads and pencil long forgotten to lay carelessly on the ground.

" Louis," Zayn whined slightly, as Louis pulled him into his lap. He placed him such that his face was directly in front of him, his legs around his waist and arms on his chest.

" What do you think about a kiss, Zee?" Louis cupped his face, his gaze dropping to those soft pink lips. He could almost taste them against his own, chapped yet tender, supple and soft. As insensitive as it must sound, Louis couldn't get that kiss out of his head. No matter the circumstances, it was a kiss and it was the best one he had ever experienced. It was the only thing that kept him sane, throughout the whole ordeal, reminding him that Zayn did kiss him back and there was hope that they could be something way more than what they were.

" A kiss?" Zayn fluttered his eyelashes, dropping his head slightly. Louis could feel the heat under his fingers where they touched his cheeks, the blush overpowering the tan of his skin.

" Yeah, Like this one," Louis mumbled, before placing his lips on Zayn's softer ones. The older lad had had the conversation with himself a dozen times, he had repeated to himself that he wouldn't risk losing their friendship, that he would be whatever Zayn wanted him to be. However, with him smiling like that and blushing madly, he just couldn't control himself. It should've been a surprise for him when Zayn reacted to the kiss, his lips molding perfectly against Louis' but instead, it felt utterly natural. Maybe it was because Louis had fantasized about it to the point where he started believing it or Maybe it was something else But all the cerulean eyed lad knew was that it was real and it was perfect.

The kiss itself lasted only a few minutes, but for Louis, it was like an eternity of bliss. He was over the moon, absolutely out of his senses. The urge of jumping around the entire school, shouting it out from the mountaintops and kissing Zayn until his lips were raw was extremely overwhelming but one look at Zayn and he was coming back to the ground, his high dissipating off of his body. The raven haired lad was awestruck, his eyes glazed and a shy smile on his lips.

" So?" Louis pushed his chin, for him to look up at him. Zayn blinked his eyes, tucking his lower lips under his teeth. He breathed out something that Louis couldn't really catch but the smile on his face told him he enjoyed it. " Zaynie?"

" Em... Kissing is nice?" It felt like there was a tornado in Louis' stomach. He almost jumped in his position, causing Zayn to wrap his arms around his neck, giggling cutely.

" I can't believe it!" He wraps his arms around Zayn's waist, getting up carefully. Once on his feet, he twirled them around, dying a little with every single giggle that escaped Zayn's mouth.

" Louis! I'm gonna get dizzy!" He squeaked, his voice shriller than usual. Louis stopped in his movement releasing Zayn out of his grasp. The younger lad stumbled on his feet, laughing continuously. " Woah, see! Dizzy spells!" He clutched onto Louis' arms steadying himself.

Louis sat down bringing the younger lad down with himself.

" Now tell me Zayn. What do you think about a date?" He moved so that he was sitting exactly in front of the shorter lad, their knees touching slightly. Zayn smiled at him, the blush still evident on his face.

" Over-rated." Louis' smile faltered slightly. " But I'd loved to go on one with you." Only to lift itself back into a brighter one. He couldn't help but leap forward, hugging Zayn with all his might, receiving soft chuckles as the only response.

" Okay, so you and me Friday. I'll pick you up, okay?" Louis pulled back, smiling at Zayn who only nodded. Zayn was smiling too, his amber eyes crinkling with happiness. " Oh my god! does that mean I can do this?" Louis leapt off from his place situating himself behind Zayn. He pulled Zayn's head, resting it in his lap. " I love this! " He exclaimed dramatically while stroking Zayn's hair. It was like one of his dreams, only less ridiculous and realer.

" Louis?" Zayn asked, his eyes close against Louis' thigh.

" Yeah?" Louis kept pulling at the strands of his hair lightly, loving the feeling of the soft and thick hair under his fingers.

" You remember you said, you'd tell me what happened between you and Harry when we don't meet in a weird situation. I know this is weird but this is a good weird and well I really want you to tell me." Louis felt his heart swell at the 'good weird' part, he breathed deeply before starting the story.

" Well, it's actually pretty lame. " Zayn sat up, his eyes shining with curiosity. " It was your brother's ego. You see I had this stupid ex-girlfriend who I really needed to get back on. She cheated on me." Louis made a distasteful face as he was reminded of his past.

"I'm sorry." He looked up at Zayn, who looked genuinely apologetic about it. Caressing his cheek, he smiled at him.

" Don't worry about it. I got over her even before I found out she was cheating on me. She just made things easier by being a bitch." Zayn chuckled at that. " Well, there was this, I don't know, debating competition of some sort and she was hosting it. And I had it all planned out, I was going to drop a bucket load of cheese and ketchup on her, cause she said that I was too cheesy for her taste. " Zayn frowned, slightly. " Yeah." Louis nodded at him, before continuing. " So, me and my pal, Doug, he's the one who snuck out that library stamp. Good lad. " Zayn smiled slightly, a distant look in his eyes. "Anyways, we got on the roof and well I could see her standing exactly where I wanted her to. So I made my move, spilling it all over her." Zayn gaped at the nonchalance. " Now it's wasn't exactly my fault that your brother decided to co-host and Well, they kinda had the same hair. It was not my fault!"

" You did not! Not his hair!" Zayn's eyes were wide, an incredulous expression on his face.

" I spilled the cheese and ketchup on him." Louis shrugged. " After that, it was like a war had broken out. I swear I tried telling him that it wasn't him I was targeting but he was just too..." Louis racked his brain for the right word, shaking his head when he couldn't. " I don't know. He just made it all about himself and How I must've been jealous of him and all, blah blah blah. Trust me, I could care less about anyone, especially him." He stated with a distinct obviousness in his tone.

" You!" Zayn laughed, covering his face with the back of his sleeve.

" See, you're laughing. I told you it was lame!" Louis pulled his head back into his lap, massaging his head with his fingers.

" Why did you make it sound like it was something big? Why the suspense?" Zayn said between, the residual giggles.

" Because I really wanted to keep you around and you being the curious cat. It was the only way." Louis shrugged, struggling not to smile.

" Hey!" Zayn yelled sitting up again, this time crossing his legs all the way so that his knees were touching Louis'.

" What?" Louis chuckled, as he felt small hands hitting his chest. He was about to grab both of Zayn's hands when they were alerted by Zayn's phone. Zayn stopped hitting him, taking his phone out of his pocket.

" Haz?" Zayn attended the call. Louis hummed to the ringtone, swaying a little." But, Liam's going over to his aunt. You know that." Zayn smiled at him, placing his finger on his lips signalling for him to stop. " You want me to come with, Louis?" That got Louis' attention his eyes widening slightly, matching that of Zayn's. " Yeah, okay. I'll come with Louis. Bye, Haz." He ended the call, placing his phone back in the pocket." Your voice is good."

" Did your brother just said that I could drop you off?" Louis asked him, completely brushing off the compliment. Zayn nodded, casually. " Maybe, I won't have to get my ass beaten just to date you," He said thoughtfully.

" Yeah?" Zayn chuckled, getting off the ground and brushing the dust off of himself. " He said to be back in ten. So, I think you should get up." He said while packing his stuff carefully. Louis jumped off of the ground taking Zayn's backpack from him.

" You know, I still can't believe that I can do this." And with that he pecked his lips softly, making Zayn drop his head and blush like crazy.

" Yeah, just not in front of my brother, though." He rubbed his foot on the ground, a shy smile on his face.

" Yeah, he's probably gonna kill me." They started moving, getting back to the building and making their way to the parking lot.

" Don't worry, I won't let him." And if that didn't make Louis' heart explode, nothing ever could. " Hey, I almost forgot!" He stopped in his tracks, taking his bag from Louis'. " You're drawing." He pulled out a piece of paper from the front pocket handing it over to Louis.

" I almost thought you were going to stop drawing for me, now that you're famous." Louis took the bag back, balancing it on his shoulder before they started walking. He opened it feeling a deep emotion stretching in the wall of his heart. It was him again. This time, he was dressed up in all black a mask settled on his face. " I am a thief in this aren't I?" He mocked annoyance, fighting the smile that made it's way up to his lips.

" Yeah." Zayn chuckled, the amusement clear in his tone. They were now in the parking lot heading over towards Louis' car.

Soon they were settled in the car and Louis was driving them towards Zayn's place.

" Louis, where do you live?" Louis looked at him, frowning at the question.

" At home?" He replied, casually.

" Well, obviously. Where do you live? Why do I not know anything about your family?" Zayn scoffed, rolling his eyes.

" Well, what do you wanna know?" Louis reversed the car, carefully trying to keep his eyes focused.

" Everything?" Zayn nudged his shoulder, trying to gain his attention.

" Okay. So, you've been to my place." Once on the road, Louis looked back at Zayn to see a genuinely inquisitive look on his face.

" No, I haven't." He shook his head, jutting out his lips.

" Well, not technically. Like you were two houses away from it." Louis supplied, reminding him of the time when he stopped by with his brother to pull that doll prank.

" Oh, that time." Realisation dawned on his face, making his eyebrows stretched out and his lips in an 'o' shape.

" Yeah, when you were being snappy and sleepy." Louis smiled, remembering the interesting conversation they had.

" I'm sorry." He looked back at Zayn who tilted his head, embarrassment clear on his face.

" No, it was cute." Louis smiled, watching him squirm under his gaze. " Anyways, There's my mum, she's a doctor. She's really nosy and I don't like her. Also my sister, Abby she's in uni so I don't really get to see her that much. Most of the times, I'm on my own and it kinda gets boring and well that's all." He shrugged, indifferently.

" What about your dad?" Zayn asked him curiously. Suddenly, Louis was reminded about the incident on the street last week and well there was a distinctive yell that was nudging at the back of his head. It was Zayn and he was yelling for his dad to not do it and that he'll be good.

" Let's make a deal. Hmm?" Louis knew that it was a risk but he just couldn't brush it off. " You tell me about yours and I'll tell you about mine," He said tentatively.

" Well, mine's a dick." Zayn stated, rather simply. It took Louis off-guard because Zayn was not usually a person to swear. Actually, Louis had never heard him use even a remotely bad word. " He's an alcoholic and in jail. I don't really like him. Well, I'm sure you already know that. He was fine, I guess or maybe I was too little to see it, the devil behind his real personality. I don't know. They used to fight a lot and when my mum decided she had had enough they got a divorce. That was a year ago." He nodded his head, slowly.

" That's why you were gone," Louis said the first thing that came up to his mind.

" Yeah, Harry fought a lot, He did." Zayn looked at him, a distant look in his eyes. " He was always there Louis. He distracted me from the fact that life was hell. I never realized how bad it was because he was always there. I was fine when we were together." He paused slightly, taking a deep breath.

" Where did he took you?" Louis asked, diverting his gaze from the road and back to him.

" Cheshire. It's where he's actually from. He's a bad person." Zayn threw his head back resting it on the seat.

" Zayn you don't have to.." Louis started but he was interrupted even before he could finish his sentence.

" No, Louis. It feels good to admit it, I can't keep living like it never happened. I have to accept it and move on." Zayn nodded his head, looking at Louis with a stern expression.

" Okay." Louis was not sure if he was going to be able to handle the entire story but if it meant that Zayn would feel better, listening to it was the least he could do.

" He used to beat me. Always said that I was like an extra baggage. That, until it was just Harry things were fine between him and mum, they loved each other. But when mum had me everything took a bad turn and that I was cursed or something. And I know he was lying because everything was perfect until it wasn't." Zayn's voice disappeared at the end. " You know the hardest part was convincing myself that he was wrong and that I hadn't been the cause of it all. And even then Harry helped me. I even saw him a couple of times, he was talking to me. He told me that he was going to get me out and that was the only reason I survived. And he did get me out." Louis felt his heart ache at those words. It was like he was discovering this entirely different chapter of Zayn's life. " This one time, he came back home drunk as ever and I was waiting for him so that I could get him to bed safely and." Zayn's voice cracked, giving away into a soft sob.

" Zayn you can stop whenever you want to." He just shook his head, continuing.

" He tried to force himself on me but I managed to get away. That was the most terrifying thing that I had ever experienced. Imagine your own father trying to knock you out so he can have his way with you." Louis felt as if his heart had been stabbed.

" Zayn." He tried reaching out to him, craving to console him in any way possible.

" That guy on the street, I don't remember his face Louis because all I saw was my father's face. That's why I was yelling for him to stop." Zayn finally broke down, losing himself to the sobs and tears. Louis parked his car on the side of the road, unbuckling Zayn's seatbelt haphazardly. Carefully, he pulled the younger lad onto his lap, hugging him with all that he had.

" I wish none of that would have had happened, Zayn." He rubbed the small of his back, trying to soothe him. After a couple of minutes, Zayn pulled away wiping the tears from his eyes.

" I'm fine, Louis. I seriously am. Up until now it was like I was hiding from it and now I'm not. It happened and it made me who I am now. It taught me to cherish people because they might change." He took Louis' hands in his own, rubbing them with his thumbs.

" Well, I won't and you'll never have to worry about it." Louis placed his hands around his waist steadying him on the seat.

" I know." A sudden warmth spread throughout his chest, making him smile like an idiot.

" You used to call me on my.." Yet again they were interrupted in their moment by drake's voice. Zayn got back to his seat, picking up his phone.

"Yeah, Harry. We're gonna be there in a second." Louis started his car, driving again. " Yeah, I know where it is." He signalled for Zayn to put on his seat belt. " Okay, I'll send him in." Sighing, when he just shook it off.

" Seatbelt on now, Zaynie," Louis said, firmly.

" Okay, what's the big deal? We're literally two house away!" Zayn struggled with his seatbelt, before finally getting it right.

" Safety first, Zaynie," Louis repeated, smiling as he heard his mother's voice in his head. " You're fine, right?" He looked over at Zayn, concern dripping his voice.

" Yeah, it actually felt good saying it out loud. " Zayn gave him a soft smile, wiping away the remnants of sadness on his face.

" You can always count on me for listening, Zee. Although, I'm shit at advice!"Zayn chuckled.

" Now tell me about your dad."

" Well, mine was a dick too. He kinda left the day I was born so I don't really know about him but from what mum told me I think he was quite the douchebag. " Louis tried to conclude it all in a little sentence. It wasn't really that inaccurate, though, he just left out the part where his dad cheated on his mum even when they were dating and then they got married and things got more complicated with Abby and Louis. Lon story short, he couldn't handle it and bailed.

" Well, that's one thing we've got in common." Zayn smiled at him, unbuckling his seat belt as Louis stopped the car. Louis waited for him to say something, as a goodbye but Zayn just got out of the car.

"Oh, I forgot. Harry said that they are having this little party and well that I could invite you in." Louis frowned at him confused.

" Are you sure it was your brother? I mean he said that?" Louis got out of the car, locking it before following Zayn towards the door.

" I need to get some things from the garage, you can go in." Zayn signalled to Louis with his thumb. Louis felt an odd feeling creep up his skin. He wasn't so sure about it. " Go on, it's open." Zayn urged him to move, his eyes compelling. Shifting on his feet, Louis made his way towards the door, turning the knob tentatively. When the door opened without any problem, he felt himself sighing in relief and entering the house.

Biggest mistake of his life.

He gasped as something came into contact with his head forcefully, not comprehending the viscosity of it. Soon, he was drenched in what he could only list off as some sort of goo. It was everywhere from his hair to his eyelids, everywhere.

" Got you!" He opened his eyes to look at Harry who stood in front of him, a triumphant smile on his face. His friend was there too, the blonde that talked to much. He was laughing.

" Oh my god, Louis. I didn't know they were going to do this." Louis turned in his position to look at Zayn who stood absolutely horrified, one of his small hands covering his lips. Louis looked back at his antagonist, a sudden smile appearing on his lips.

" I want to be mad about this. I seriously do. But Fuck, I missed it!" He wiped the liquid from his eyes, sniffing on it. " Cheese and ketchup. Is this some sort of weird way to end it all?" He smiled as Harry only shrugged.

" Great now we've wasted a good amount of cheese and ketchup for nothing! Haz, we could've made pizza! Tonne's of pizza's" The blonde scoffed, dramatically throwing his hands up.

Louis shook his head, turning back to Zayn who still stood outside, a small smile on his face.

" I guess this is how it's gonna be right? At least, I get to stay with you." Louis shrugged, tilting his head a little. His heart warming at the smile that Zayn flashed him.

Was it going to be easy, tolerating Styles? He did not think so. But was Zayn worth it? Totally.

+

Hi guys,

IT'S YOU got me all worked up and well I sorta ended up writing 4000 words and well its by far the longest chapter I've ever written and well I don't know. I can't believe I wrote this chapter, I have imagined this one so fricking much I just felt like I would never be able to write it. Also I'm a lazy person and I never complete anything but I can see myself completing this story and that's only becuase of you guys. Don't forget to leave me some love, I literally would love you for it!

Preach.Vote.Comment.Love Zayn

Love,

Sara xx


	24. ۲۲

Zayn frowned at the sketchpad in his lap, a pout settling itself on his lips. He shifted his gaze to look at his mother before looking back at his drawing. Unsatisfied, he shook his head and continued his work. The art competition was in less than a week and he still had to practice before making the final drawing. To say that Zayn was stressed would be a massive understatement. 

" Zayn, are you done?" His mum asked, her voice hinting irritation. Zayn had decided to draw her first because he thought she was the easier choice and having drawn her various times before it wouldn't be that hard. However, no matter how hard he tried to sketch her from memory, it just would not happen. Something wouldn't be right and he couldn't even point out what it was. So, after a couple of dozen times, he sat his mum down on the couch settling himself on the ground a little away from her and started to draw her. Even then, there was a little something that felt out of place.

" No, mum just a few more minutes." He shaded the hair on the paper with soft strokes, concentration evident on his face. " Stop moving. I need to practice." He released his lower lip from under his teeth, coughing a little. 

" Zayn, I swear It's been two hours and my back hurts!" She stretched her back, putting both of her hands on it for the best angle. Tiredness seeping out of her body. 

" I know but I really need to get it right," Zayn explained, ignoring her protests and focusing on his drawing.

" But you will. Just please let me go." She whined, letting out a yawn. Zayn didn't look up, still focused on his drawing.

" In a minute now mum. If you would've stopped moving, I would've been done by now." He let out, smiling a little at the gasp that escaped his mother's lips. From his peripheral vision, he saw her getting up and reaching for him, but he kept to his position too involved in perfecting his drawing. He squeaked when his sketch pad was snatched from his grasp, thankful that he had retracted his pencil at the right time.

" Mom!" Zayn jumped up from his position on the floor and tried to reach for his drawing. He still was not sure about it and so he did not want her to see it.

" No." She shook her head, glaring at him." Let me see it!" Zayn pouted but relaxed in his position letting his hand fall around his torso. He hoped that she wouldn't see the obvious faults in the sketch.

" It's not done yet." He rolled his eyes, as his mother inspected the page from every angle possible, her face void of any expression. He was sure that she didn't like it and that made his skin crawl with disappointment.

" I think we've got a problem." She looked at him, a disapproving expression on her face. Zayn's stomach dropped thinking of something being exceptionally wrong with the drawing.

" What?" He asked hesitantly, his eyes widening a little.

" They are going to think you cheated." She smiled making a sudden warmth spread in Zayn's chest. He shook his head, biting his lower lip trying to suppress the smile threatening to break his face. She opened her mouth to say something to him but was interrupted by Harry.

" Mum, it's officer Brady. He's saying they've got him." He walked into the living room, his mobile cradled to his chest. Zayn's smile faltered a frown appearing on his face. He knew exactly who his brother was talking about and he was not happy about it. The raven haired lad just wanted to forget about the whole ordeal, erasing it from his mind.

" Okay, tell him we're coming." His mother said, an urgency to her voice. She handed Zayn's sketchpad back to him, a soft question in her eyes. Anxiety made his body tense, his heart tried to leap out his chest.  
" I don't want to go." Zayn blurted out even before she could open her mouth to speak. She gave her a pleading look, but he wasn't having any of it. Even the thought of seeing that guy was making him lose his mind, he didn't want to know what would happen if he saw him in person. 

" No, No!" He shook his head until he felt her small hands cupping his face. Her features had morphed themselves into genuine concern and understanding.

" Okay. Harry can stay." She said softly, trying to get it through him. Zayn let out a breath he hadn't known he had been holding, nodding at her words.

" No, I wanna go, Mum. It's important." Harry's tone was determined, the phone still clutched to his chest. Zayn looked at him, a frown on his lips. Harry diverted his gaze to him giving him a pleading look. Even in those circumstances, Zayn could understand his brother. 

" Harry, attend the call first and then we can talk about it." Their mother looked at Harry, a stern expression on her face. Harry turned in his position and walked out, placing the phone on his ear.

Zayn took her hands in his own giving them a reassuring squeeze.

" It's fine I'll call Liam over. He'll keep me company." He said, breathing through his nose. There was a little tug at his chest pulling his breath and he was trying to calm it down so it wouldn't blow up into a complete attack. 

" You sure? " He managed to give her a decent smile, before nodding. He didn't want to hold Harry back and it had been a while since Liam had come over, so he was looking forward to their time together. 

" Okay. Harry get the car out. You call Liam." She hugged her, before turning to walk out the door, only to stop halfway through her path and looking back at him. " And, no more drawing Zayn you're gonna wear yourself out, okay? Make sure you eat something. We'll be back soon." She gave her a pointed look before proceeding in her actions.

After he heard the car moving away, he texted Liam explaining him the situation. He felt the corner of his mouth tug up forming a bright smile when his best friend responded with a ' Yasss! No little kids! ' Zayn shook his head, feeling a certain fondness for his best friend. Even though, it hadn't been that long Liam had earned himself a place in Zayn's heart. He was one of the only people Zayn was willing to tolerate even when he had just woken up in the mornings, and that was saying something. The brown haired lad was just what Zayn needed equally crazy and careful. He would never let Zayn get bored and he always knew what to do when Zayn was down. Zayn felt like he could confide in him and it had been a very long time since he had felt comfortable enough to trust someone. Except for Louis maybe but that was a different case. For some odd reason, Zayn had never hesitated when he was around Louis letting himself free and never keeping his guard up. 

A small smile crept up his lips as he thought about Louis, the mere thought of him making him blush like a little school girl.

The knock on the door brought him back to from his little day dream. He pushed himself off of the couch walking towards the front door. Not bothering to ask who it was, he opened the door and was greeted by an excited looking Liam.

" Hey! I got 'Need for Speed'!" He raised his hand showing Zayn the CD. In his own excitement, Zayn snatched the CD from his hands inspecting it from every side possible.

" Is it Most Wanted?" He asked even though he knew it was. There were no bounds to his excitement.

" Yeah!" Liam squealed coming inside and shutting the door behind him. 

" Awesome!" Zayn jumped, dragging Liam to the living room. 

For the next hour, they played the game, sharing a packet of gummy worms and a lot of other sweet things that Zayn shouldn't have eaten. Even at his age, whenever he had too much sugar, he'd get hyperactive and it wouldn't end well. He knew that but his mother had asked him to eat something so he did.

" So, how are your drawings coming out?" Liam asked him obviously bored of the game, already. 

" They are good, I guess," Zayn yelled jumping up when the police started catching up to him.

" Well, what are they about?" Liam paused the game, earning a squeak of protest from Zayn. " I'm bored, Zayn." 

" But you can't get bored! It's most wanted! Liam!" Zayn threw the console on the floor tackling Liam to the couch. " You can't get bored of most wanted! It's most wanted!" He whined childishly, hitting on Liam's chest.

" Zayn?" Liam asked confused at Zayn's strange behavior. He pushed himself up successfully pushing Zayn off of him. " Are you okay?" Zayn pouted crossing his arms over his chest.

" No, you said you got bored of most wanted! How could you?" A sad feeling crawled across Zayn's intestines urging for him to cry.

" But it's just a game, Zayn." Zayn jerked his head towards Liam, glaring at him.

" It's my favorite game!" He yelled right into, Liam's face making the taller boy cower back into the couch. Shaking his head, Liam threw up his hands in the air.

" Okay! It's not boring, it's the best game ever. I don't want to play it cause I keep losing and well yeah." Liam lied, trying to save himself from Zayn's wrath. 

" You could've just said that. I would've let you win." Zayn said a softer expression on his face while Liam only nodded ignoring the fact that he had won almost all the games.

" it's fine, tell me about the drawings," He said, mocking sadness. The pout on Zayn's face disappeared leaving a the soft expression behind.

" It's about the beauty of the world and what you like about it," He said an animated crinkle in his eye.

" Cool and what are you drawing?" Liam smiled at him. 

" All of you guys. Mum, Harry, Louis, You." Zayn counted everyone on his fingers shaking his head, dramatically. Liam smirked at him when he said ' Louis' but soon that smirk morphed itself into a surprised smile.

" Me?" His voice was laced with disbelief. Zayn nodded his head, an incredulous expression on his face.

" Yeah, silly you. You're my best friend. I love you!" He narrowed his eyes, smacking Liam in the head.

" And what do you love about me?" Liam rubbed his head, curiosity tinting his voice. Zayn reached out to grab a new packet of gummy worms before looking at Liam with a mischievous smile on his face.

" I guess you'll just have to find out. Oh, you're all invited too." Zayn clapped his hands, squinting his eyes together.

" I love you!" Liam leapt over to him, hugging his smaller best friend. Zayn squirmed slightly before wrapping his own arms around Liam's torso.

" I love you, too," He said, pulling away and opening the sealed packet of sweets.

" So, have you done any? Can I see them?" Liam settled himself back, the excitement evident in his movements.

" No! " Zayn yelled, glaring at his friend. The seriousness in his expression made Liam laugh.

" But, Zayn." He tried, but Zayn only intensified his glare pouting.

" No, Liam!" He yelled, forcefully. 

" Okay!" Liam chuckled, bringing his leg onto the couch, crossing them Indian style." Did you got called for the investigation?" He gave Zayn a brief glance before turning towards the tv.

" Not yet. " Zayn bit into a gummy worm, stretching it with his finger making it as long as possible.

" Yeah? Do you know anything about it?" Liam asked, tilting his head at his friends antics.

" No," Zayn mumbled, completely focused on the red candy in his hand.

" Zayn." Liam nudged his shoulder demanding his attention. Zayn furrowed his eyebrows, trying to untangle the candy from his fingers. 

" Okay. I might know a little something but you can't tell anyone about it. Harry made me promise!" He finally managed to eat the gummy worm, rubbing his hands together, trying to get the stickiness out of them.

" Cross my heart." Liam rolled his eyes, grabbing the pack f gummy worms from Zayn's lap.

" It's Lori!" Zayn jumped up, a weird expression on his face. It felt like he had revealed an awful secret.

" Harry's girlfriend?" Liam asked, an incredulous expression covering his face.

" Yeah! " Zayn nodded, frantically. 

" No way! " Liam shook his head, slowly as if he was trying to absorb the information. Suddenly a smile graced his lips, confusing Zayn's delirious mind. 

" Why are you smiling?" He clicked his tongue, tilting his head.

" I'm not!" Liam shifted his gaze towards Zayn, biting his lips, clearly, trying to hide his smile.

" You are!" Zayn jumped, a bubbly sound escaping his lips.

" I just didn't like her that much! She gave me bad vibes." Liam justified his actions, scratching the back of his neck nervously.

" Do you have a crush on Harry?" Zayn asked a hopeful glint in his eyes. The thought of his best friend and brother together made him feel giddy inside.

" NO!" Liam shook his head, stretching his legs in front of himself, settling his elbows on his knees.

" You totally have a crush on Harry!" Zayn smiled, jumping off of the couch.

" I don't!" Liam denied, covering his face with both of his hands, desperately trying to cover the blush on his cheeks.

" You're blushing, Liam! Just admit it!" Zayn kneeled beside him, prying his hands off of his face.

" Only, if you admit that you have a crush on Louis." Liam retorted back, challenging his friend.

" That's not a crush anymore," Zayn mumbled careless of what he had said. Liam's eyes widened.

" What?" He asked, looking directly at his friend.

" Admit that you have a crush on Harry," Zayn asked adamantly, completely ignoring Liam's question. 

" I have a crush on your brother, Zayn. Now, tell me what you meant by it's not a crush anymore." Liam imitated his voice, a questioning look on his face.

" I don't talk like that! " Zayn gasped, offended. 

" Zayn." Liam urged him to answer his question.

" Okay, Louis' kissed me and we're going on a date, this Friday." Zayn let out nonchalantly, an animated smile on his face.

" Oh my God! I thought we were best friends! You don't not tell your best friend shit like that!" Liam ranted on.

" You didn't tell me that you had a crush on Harry!" Zayn retorted, an indifferent look on his face. Liam had not told him about his crush, why was he making a big deal about it anyway? Zayn had no clue.

" I did not kiss him and I wasn't going on a date with him. I'm hurt Zayn." Liam huffed, crossing his arms on his chest.

" But, Liam. " Zayn whined, not liking his friends reaction. Fortunately, for him, Liam shook his head slightly, before smiling at him.

" What was it like? Tell me everything!" He squealed. Just thinking of the event made Zayn blush like crazy. 

" It was.. perfect." He let out, vaguely, not wanting to describe it in words.

" You have to give me more than that Zayn! Did it felt like fireworks, like it says in all those novels?" Liam was clearly excited. Zayn huffed out slightly, trying his best to expressing his emotions in words.

" No, it was more calming and soothing than that. It felt like a... I don't know how to explain it. It was just really nice. It didn't make me feel nervous at all. It felt natural. Yeah, that's what it was! Natural." Zayn jumped gleefully, content to find the right word.

" Wow. I'm really happy for you, Zee." Liam smiled, genuinely. " Does Harry know, he's taking you out on a date?" Zayn sighed, reminded of the problem he had been ignoring for a few days.

" No," He said slowly.

" Are you going to tell him?" Liam got up, standing next to him.

" Yeah, but I'm scared. You talk to him for me, after all, you have a crush on him!" Zayn pointed at his chest, in an accusing manner.

" That doesn't make any sense, Zayn. Besides, he hardly knows me. I'm just his brother's best friend." Liam looked down, striking his foot against the ground. Zayn felt upset at his friends words about himself.

" No, you're not. You are Liam Payne. You are the most caring, loving and goofy person. You are great, Liam. And I'm sure Harry'll love you. He's a bit of a fixer upper but when you get to know him he's the best." He hugged him sideways, trying to feed it into his head.

" See, stop doing that. You made me fall in love with him, always talking about him Harry this, Harry that. I mean I liked him before but he was just a popular guy with a pretty face now he's Harry with a pretty face and I think I love him." Liam scrunched his eyebrows together as he said in a complaining manner.

" Liam, you just said you love him," Zayn exclaimed, surprised at his friend's confession. It felt as if his elevated mood was drifting down and coming back to its original place.

" I know it's messed up. I mean he has a girlfriend." Liam looked up from the ground, passing a hand through his hair.

" Who might be a drug dealer," Zayn stated very obviously.

" And how are you so sure about it?" Liam let out with an inquiring tone.

" Harry said not to talk about it." Zayn zipped the fictional zip on his lips, shaking his head fervently.

" Okay. I don't care anyways. " Liam frowned, shrugging. 

" Liam, you know I would've told you. I just don't want to get in trouble with Harry again." Zayn said, truthfully. The last thing he wanted was for Liam to think he didn't trust him because he did.

" It's alright. How are things with him anyway? Is he behaving? "Liam waved him off, changing the topic. At the mention of his brother, Zayn felt a small pool of happiness in his stomach. 

" I think I am getting him back." He morphed his feelings into words, nodding his head at Liam's approving smile.

" That's good." Zayn nodded again, feeling content.

" Now, back to Harry.." He started again but was interrupted by the bell, signalling that someone was outside. For a second, Zayn felt anxiety settle itself in his stomach. He was nervous about talking to his mother and brother after their visit to the situation. He didn't know what their reaction would be.

" Oh my god, Is he back? Zayn, promise me you won't tell him!" Liam squealed jumping a bit.

" Liam I won't." Zayn turned to open the door but was stopped when Liam pulled him back a scared expression on his face.

" No, promise me first!" He demanded, clutching onto Zayn's arm like a little toddler.

" Okay! I promise! I won't tell him. Now, let me get the door." Zayn rolled his eyes, trying to keep his balance but failing due to Liam's heavy weight on him. " Liam!" He whined, struggling against the taller lad's grasp.

" Oh, sorry." Liam released his grasp on him following him outside.

Peeking through the peephole Zayn looked at a cheerful looking waiting for him outside. He frowned, taken aback by her visit, nonetheless opened the door.

" Stella?" He questioned, the frown still on his forehead. The blonde hadn't pestered Zayn by her presence in so long that Zayn had almost forgotten about her.

" Hi, Zayn." Stella smiled at him, batting her eyelashes, impressively.

" What are you doing here?" Zayn turned to look at Liam, who had a scornful expression on his face.

" I brought you a pie," Stella said completely ignoring Liam's presence.

" Okay." Zayn stretched the word, looking back and forth between Stella and Liam, a nervous smile on his face. They were alerted by a certain ringtone and Zayn knew it was his phone.

" I'll get it." Liam skipped back into the house, quickly fetching the phone." Zayn, it's Louis should I pick up the call?" He yelled back.A huge smile graced Zayn's lips as he thought about Louis.

" Give it to me, Liam." He snatched it from his friend, attending it the exact second.

" Hey, Zee." Louis' chirped making Zayn's smile bigger than ever. Stella groaned, making him hyper-aware of his surroundings, he didn't want to talk to Louis in front of Liam or Stella.

" Yeah, Lou. Is it fine if I call you in a bit?" He said, calmly.

" Em, Okay? Bye?" Louis replied, uncertain. 

" Bye." Zayn smiled to his phone before ending the call and trying to dissolve the situation at hands. 

" You know what? I'm just gonna say it! What does he have that I don't?" Stella yelled, making his eyes wide. Zayn knew what the girl was referring to and he knew that they would've had the conversation sooner or later. But what he didn't know was that it would go this way. 

" A dick." Liam let out, nonchalantly, making Zayn burst out laughing.

" Why do you like him and won't even fucking give me a chance. I've been so nice to you. I've tried everything. I baked this myself, even though, I knew it was going to ruin my nails!" She ignored Liam's statement, flashing Zayn with her bright pink nail. to be honest, Zayn didn't understand what was wrong with them.

" Stella," Zayn tried to control his laughter to let out a few word but the girl was stubborn.

" No! Am I not pretty enough for you? I'll do anything. I'll get surgery if you want me to." She emphasized her points, nodding and clenching her eyes shut.

" Then you better get a gender-change because Zaynie over here is gay." Liam got in front of Zayn, ripping it off like a band-aid.

" What do you mean?" Stella looked at him, panting. Zayn suppressed his chuckles, covering his face with his fists. Liam looked at him a triumphant expression on his face.

" I like boys," He mumbled, feeling the blush heating his ears. Stella's reaction was priceless. She opened her mouth to say something, before gulping hard and closing her mouth. 

" Em" She shook her head, her face contorting into a distasteful expression. It almost made Zayn feel sorry but then he looked at Liam who was absolutely delighted with the whole situation and some of the guilt dissipated off of him. 

" Thanks for the pie. Goodbye, Stella." Liam snatched the pie from her hands, before stepping inside and shutting the door on her face.

" Oh my god!" Zayn exclaimed, laughing at the entire event. Liam only jumped waltzing around the entire house.

" Finally! I'm free of that bitch!"

+

This is extremely overdue and I don't even know how it went. Actually, I kinda wrote the dialogues for this a week ago and well If you've ever done that or you are planning to do that. Please don't. It makes everything a thousand times harder. Anyways, its long and well I'm very tired. No Zouis but I needed Ziam. If I had a penny that fell from above every time I wrote Liam and autocorrect changed it into LIMA, I'd be rolling in my money, every day would be sunny and I'd be looking forward to the next time I wrote Liam. (If you know the reference I already love you.)

Don't forget to tell me how you like it and well I'll try to fix another chapter for you soon. 

Preach.Vote.Comment.Love Zayn.

Love, 

Sara xx


	25. ۲۳

" Why am I here?" Her gaze shifted from the principal to her boyfriend. She smirked at the intensity of his glare and rubbed her hands together setting them on her knees. Harry breathed deeply, trying his hardest to keep his composure. The last thing he wanted was to hit the girl before getting a confession. He knew he had to stay calm, but her indifference to the situation was aggravating his already blooming anger.  
" Ms. Blair, you know what's been happening at the school?" The principal, Mr. Adams, started out calmly. He was a decent man in his late fifties with a patient but authoritative aura. When Harry had approached him, the previous day, he had handled the matter with such professionalism, formulating a plan in a matter of minutes that the boy knew, he had come to the right person. Even though they basically decided to corner his ex-girlfriend and pressure it out of her but Harry knew it was their only way.  
" Yeah and I've been questioned already." Lori said, her expressions completely passive.   
" I'm aware." Mr. Adams pressed his hands together shaking them slightly, which was basically a signal that they had reached the first stage. He opened his drawer getting out a couple of files from them. Lori visibly stiffened in her seat before regaining her composure.  
" So why am I here? And why are all these people here?" She gave a brief glance to the people around the room, which included a few police officials, a witness and some other related people, before landing her gaze at her boyfriend. " Harry?" She looked at him from under her lashes, a mock innocent expression on her face. Harry gritted his teeth turning his head away from her. It felt like she knew that they were onto her and was confident that she would get away with it.  
" Ms. Blair we have uncovered some new information, and it seems that." Harry looked back to the desk as their principal opened the files and went through them trying to reach the certain page. Now, He knew it was all a bluff but Lori, on the other hand, didn't. The blonde jumped a little, when Mr. Adams stopped at a certain page, trying to get a peak of the text. For a second Harry's heart stopped, the curly-haired lad knew that If Lori found out that they didn't exactly have enough evidence against her; she would get out of this easily, and he couldn't let that happen.  
" Settle down Ms. Blair." He suppressed a sigh of relief when Lori sat back compelled by the firm command of their principal's voice.   
" Why the hell am I here?" Lori all but yelled, exasperation evident on her face. Her resolve was crumbling, and that was all they needed.   
" They know." Harry mentally face palmed when Derrick said that. Derrick was the only person who testified to their theory and the only source of evidence. The guy was huge with a certain drug addict vibe to him. At first, Harry was wary of him; he was a druggie after all, but when he showed the video to them, the curly-haired lad had to trust him. Lori looked at him, slumping a little in her position, a disgusted expression on her face.  
" They know what? And do I know you?" She raised one of her eyebrows, her words laced with confidence.   
" Enough with the games Lori!" Harry flinched at the loudness of the other lads voice. Derrick was clearly struggling to tame his anger, his face contorted into a deep scowl. " Everybody knows and you can't escape it." His voice came out so cold that Harry could feel his toes curling with the intensity of it.  
For a second, it seemed like Lori would break any second and give into their trap but the blonde was stubborn. She shook her head lightly and turned to look at the principal.   
" Are you going to tell me why I am here? I've got better things to do." The principal didn't even react to her question, maintaining his posture.   
" You think you can do this? You can't get away from this Lori. You won't. I told you I would tell. Now you choke." He all but whispered, a manic tinge to his voice. Everyone else around the room looked at their exchange in complete silence as if witnessing something in a movie.   
Lori looked actually frightened, her eyes glazing over as she opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. Harry looked over at Mr. Adams who gave him a firm nod before diverting his gaze towards a police official. The officer just nodded at his unsaid command and walked closer to the desk.  
" Ms. Blair we have enough evidence to prove that you've been supplying drugs to the school and that you." The officer was interrupted when she jumped off her chair screeching and yelling.  
" What the fuck? That's a lie. You are lying! I'm not the drug dealer!" She yelled. The officer looked over the principal with an exceptionally calm expression. It was then that Harry realized that this was only routine for them. While he was shitting his pants over the whole ordeal every other person in the room had seen this before and were experienced enough to tackle the situation.  
The principal took out his laptop and turned it as such that it was facing Lori. He pushed the play button on the video and it started.The video was tilted but clear. It was Lori and Derrick both standing in a closed space.   
Derrick looked like a wreck, a couple of bills in his hands. And Lori looked tentative, looking around more then a couple of times.

"Do you have the money?" Lori asked hurriedly. Derrick just nodded his head, looking very out of it. He shoved the money in her hand and she placed a packet of white in his palm.  
"But this isn't enough Florence! I need more of it!" Derrick whined clutching at the drugs in his hands.   
"No, you pay, you get coke! You don't, you choke!" Lori said while counting the money and then placing it in the back of her pocket. Derrick looked angry, almost angry enough to hit her.  
"I know who you are! I'll tell the entire school!" He threatened.  
"Yeah and maybe I'll tell the principle about how there is a drug addict on the loose and who exactly the drug addict is. Now, you and I both know who he's gonna believe. So,keep you're mouth shut, you scumbag!" She laughed maniacally.   
Suddenly there was a knock on the door, startling them both.  
"Who the fuck is there?" She yelled before opening the door and running out. 

And the video ended. Harry looked over at Lori to see her reaction and was surprised at her complete calmness.  
" This, Ms. Blair, is only a part of the evidence that we have against you." The officer stated with an underlying threat.   
" That's fake and if it were true, he'd be going to jail too." She pointed towards a smirking Derrick.  
" It's worth it if it gets you out of your game." He said, the smirk still present on his face. Harry wondered if it were the drugs or had the guy been this crazy since forever.   
" I will never be out of my game! You think this is going to work? Even if I do go to jail, I will get out and it'll be all the same again. But you!" She shook her head, an amused expression on her face. " You will die in a cell. The drugs that kept you alive till now will kill you and I will celebrate that day." She yelled in his face. Her words made Harry's skin crawl who was she and who had he been dating till a week ago. Why couldn't he see the reality behind her facade?   
" Ms. Blair I want you to confess it all." Mr. Adams sighed heavily when she interrupted him with a quick,  
" I don't know what you're talking about." The menacing expression on her face was covered with the mask of indifference.  
" You're making this hard for yourself. If you confess I'll put in my word that you cooperated or else you'll get a worse sentence." The officer's voice boomed in the entire room. Lori clasped her mouth shut and looked at him directly a determined expression her face.  
" Have you been selling illegal drugs to minors?" The officer started.  
" I'm a minor." She said almost impulsively.  
" Is James Blair your cousin?" Harry cringed at the name of the rapist, bile rising at the back of his throat. He watched as something shined in her eyes and she gulped quite visibly. Hope sparked under Harry's skin, it felt like they were close to getting somewhere and he was desperate for that moment.  
" Did you sent him to harm Mr. Zayn Styles?" Harry breathed deeply at that, the reality of the situation collapsing at him. He glared at the girl who almost ruined everything in his life, hoping that she would crack under the intensity of it but she kept her mouth shut.  
"Ms. Blair, did you do it?" Suddenly her she jerked her head towards Harry, looking at him directly an amused expression on her face.  
" Yes I did! I wish he would've killed him off like I paid him to. Horny bastard." Harry felt as if all the air had been knocked out of him. Rage knotted up in his stomach and suddenly the idea of hitting a girl didn't seem that absurd.  
" Ms. Blair." Mr. Adams started but couldn't say much.  
" Oh shut up with all this Mr. and Ms.. What is this law and order?" She yelled taking them all of guard.  
" You just confessed to.." He started again but was interrupted.  
" Attempted murder? Yeah! I wish it would've been murder though." She looked directly at Harry, who was about ready to attack her.  
" Florence!" Mr. Adams warned her aware of Harry's state. She looked over at him with a smirk on her face.  
" Son of a bitch found me doing a deal. Actually that deal in the video. Ran away like a wimp." She cackled abnormally. " If it wasn't for the book he dropped I would've never known it was him. I thought he knew that it was me and was waiting for the right moment to expose me, but he didn't know shit." She threw her head back as another series of cackles escaped her. " I wanted you to hate him, so you'd never believe if he ever said something about it. Look how that worked out?" She was laughing full on now, and Harry was on the verge of kicking her six feet under.   
" You..." he breathed deeply trying not to ruin his composure.  
" Yeah me. Also that book in the locker, me. That picture of you, me. That bruise on his face, me. That burn in his heart where you were, me." And that was it; Harry was pouncing on her before he could register, and as soon as he was able to knock her down to the ground he was being held back. Lori clutched her head and laughed a little. " Poor little Zaynie," She tsked. " Didn't know what he did. You know I've been making lives hell since I was a toddler but this, this took the cake. All thanks to you and your dumb brother." She said still on her position on the ground.  
Harry struggled to get loose almost ready to kill her. He couldn't let her go with all that she had done. It was one thing to think that she might be behind it all, but it was a completely different thing to hear it out in her own words witnessing the pleasure she felt in their destruction.   
" Harry!" His attention was diverted towards the door where a breathless Niall stood, one of his hands over his chest. Harry frowned, some of the anger dissipating off of him. Niall had an aghast expression on his face, his breathing irregular. Worry pooled at Harry's stomach, and he almost yelled at his friend.  
" It's Zayn."  
Harry felt his heart drop in the deepest pit of his stomach.  
+  
Hi! Guys how are my lovely people!  
So this was a stupid update but I really had to give you guys something. I mean it's been three months since I last updated this book and I'm a really shitty person for that. Anyways how many of you had to re read this thing over here and how many of your remember if Lori was a blonde or a brunette ( cause I don't 


	26. ۲۴

" Zayn!"   
Zayn flinched, every muscle in his body tensing in fear.   
" Hey, are you okay?" He looked up at Liam and nodded slightly not trusting his voice.   
It was one of those days. The days where life was too overwhelming for him. Where it felt as if everyone was an enemy, conspiring against him. Where even the smallest of things startled him to no end. Where he was reminded to fear the world by his own conscience. Where his brain become too overprotective, making him a paranoid mess. The worst days of his life.  
Previously, Zayn was of the belief that there were some triggers that made the entire situation unbearable but with time, it became clear to him that there were just some days where he would get out of bed and everything would be too much. The triggers just added more angst to his condition.  
Waking up that day had been a task in itself but Zayn was managing until he saw Harry. The curly haired lad had been oddly distant, talking only when he was directly addressed to and even then no more than a few words. His green eyes had held a distinct emotion within them, which Zayn could only decipher as anger.  
Was the anger directed towards Zayn? He didn't know. In fact, he didn't want to know. It scared him, the possibility of his brother being mad at him, again.   
To top that off it was Friday which meant Zayn had a date with Louis in the evening and he hadn't talked to Harry about it yet.   
" You sure? Cause I've been talking to you for like twenty minutes now and you just keep staring at me." Liam said concern painted on his face. Zayn pressed his hand to his chest, rubbing on it slightly as he felt his lungs tighten up.   
" Yeah I'm fine, just thinking. What were you saying?" He said taking a few deep breaths. His asthma had been acting up a little lately and even though it was pretty normal for him, with the seasonal change and all, Zayn could feel the tightening in his chest getting harsher than usual.  
" Come on let's sit down, yeah?" Liam looked at him with a soft expression before placing his arm around his shoulder and gently walking towards a bench. Hastily, Zayn sat on the bench, breathless from the brief walk. " Where's your inhaler?" He looked up at Liam, cursing mentally as a wheezing sound came out of his lips.   
" It's in my bag." He breathed as deeply as possible, only to surrender to the coughs bubbling up his throat and piercing their way out of him.   
" Shit Zayn, why'd you keep it in your bag?" Liam passed a hand through his hair, clearly lost on what to do.   
" It's fine, Li. I'll be fine." Zayn said, thumping on his chest in an attempt to stop the tides of intense pain crashing on his ribs. Liam shook his head unconvinced by his friend's words.  
" Let's just get you to your bag." He turned away from the coughing lad and kneeled down on the ground. Confused, Zayn frowned at him tilting his head a little. " Come on, get on my back. I don't think it's okay for you to walk." The brunette let out, turning around a little in his position. Zayn felt a blush spread under his cheeks as he considered the options but another brutal cough, racking through his frame, made it easy for him to decide.   
Shyly, he climbed on his best friends back securing his arms across his neck and his legs across his waist. A few giggles escaped him when he felt an earthquake under himself as Liam got up.   
" Hold on tight, Zee." Liam bounced him a little, before starting to walk towards their lockers, carefully but quickly. Zayn clasped his hands together, hiding his face in Liam's back so that he wouldn't get assaulted by the chill in the air.  
Soon they were standing outside the lockers, where Liam fumbled with Zayn's lock before finally opening it.  
" Which pocket, Zee?" Zayn sighed internally at the question. The raven haired lad knew that if he spoke one more time he was going to cough himself to the point of exhaustion. Fortunately, Liam opened the first zip and there it was sitting right at the top. Zayn was about to get off when he felt a hand grabbing his own. " Don't move, Zee. I'll find us a place to sit."   
Zayn tightened his grasp as he felt Liam floating through the people and towards the stairs. " Make little room guys!" Liam yelled at the crowd gathered around the stairs but none of them moved completely absorbed in their conversation. " What the hell is going on?" Liam yelled, anxiety dripping from his voice. Startled, some of the people had turned around giving Liam an incredulous look.   
" Dude, do you not know?" A blonde boy asked.   
" The only thing I know is that my friend is sick and I need to sit him down, so clear the fucking area, now!" Zayn flinched at the harshness of Liam's tone. Not once in the period that they had known each other had he heard Liam being so rude and loud with anyone.   
" Woah, calm down dude. Make space guys." The same blonde exclaimed, waving his hands at his friends as a signal for them to disperse.   
Finally, Zayn was being lowered to the ground and the blue breathing assistant was handed to him. The sixteen-year-old opened his mouth to release all the air but before he could place the device to his lips, a series of suppressed coughs exploded through his chest. His eyes started watering and his sides screamed in pain. Determined to chase it away, he shook his head and tried to get his breathing levelled. After a few minutes of constant struggle, he was able to get the coughing under control, but not without a few reassuring words by his best friend.  
" So what's it that's got y'all excited?" Liam asked as Zayn tried to use his inhaler again, breathing out completely.  
" The drug dealer got caught." And that was enough to make him choke.   
" You won't believe who that is." He looked up at Liam and as soon as their gaze met they knew the secret was out.  
" It's Lori!" Zayn felt as if someone had drenched him in a bucket full of fear, the skin on his cheeks pressing the blood vessels under itself suffocating him.  
You know when you're dreaming, and suddenly you start falling, and you're falling, and you're falling until you wake up and realise that it's a dream.  
That's exactly what Zayn felt, except that it wasn't a dream, and he wasn't going to wake up. Instead, he was left to fend for himself in the crippling fear, as he struggled to breathe.  
It was inevitable he knew, things as such don't stay hidden for long. And a small of part of him even felt slightly glad that the situation was taken care of, without him having to lie to anyone. However, the highly active negative part, made him wonder if he had somehow let it slip. Even though, he had considered the fact that the only people who knew other than him were Louis and Liam. And if Zayn couldn't trust them, he didn't know what to think of the world anymore.  
As irrational as ever he started thinking of what was to come and the consequences that even in his distressed state, seemed absurd. However, he was too absorbed in his pessimism to convince himself otherwise.   
Harry was mad at him, was the first thing that raided his mind, wiping out every particle of his sanity. With that fear and his crazy imagination combined, he started thinking about what would happen until the point he could see it behind the back of his eyes.  
It came out like every other attack only, this time, it was aided by the asthma flare he had been experiencing. The already painful trickle in his chest started blooming forming itself into a lump the size of his fist. Banging on his chest he tried to avoid his imminent fate.  
" Zayn." He could hear Liam calling out to him but he couldn't respond to him. The idea of Harry being mad at him was alarming to his frail state and it made everything a whole lot worse.  
" Zayn!!" He heard an oddly familiar voice, unable to give any sort of response yet again. From his peripheral vision, he saw a flash of blonde rushing past his sight and being replaced by the comforting brown. He felt as soon took him by his shoulder jerking him out of the trance.  
With a hazy tint to his actions Zayn looked over at Liam and from then on everything went into overdrive. It felt as if he had been under the water and was just making his way out of the surface.  
" Harry hates me." Was the only coherent thing he said, before completely coming back to the world. The first thing he noticed was that he was coughing uncontrollably and no matter how hard he tried he couldn't stop. The second one was that Liam was looking at his with his eyes wide in fear and concern.   
" Breathe Zaynie, Breath!" He tried his best when he heard his best friend's voice crack but it was hard. It felt as if he was being torn apart from the inside out and every single bone in his chest was cracking from different places.  
At some point, the coughing must've gotten too much for him because the only thing he remembered after that was calming darkness.  
+  
COMMENT. LEAVE KUDOS.


	27. ۲۵

The first thing he noticed was the slight pressure on the bridge of his nose and the sadly familiar tingle of oxygen trickling down his throat. Irritated, he tried to scratch it but was stopped by the heavy weight restricting his arm. A sudden wave of deja vu crashed him and for a second he was convinced that it had all been a dream. That he had dreamt his time back at home, with Harry and his mother but what struck him was the possibility that he had dreamt Louis. That the cerulean eyed embodiment of hope and joy in his life had just been a figment of his imagination.

His heart dropped into his stomach, at the thought.

If he had made Louis up then Zayn wasn't sure what was real in life and what was not. What was Zayn supposed to do in life? What would he wake up thinking? What would his last thought be when he fell asleep? More importantly, if Louis wasn't real then who had Zayn fallen for?

Panicked, he thrashed on the bed, jerking his legs straight. Tears pooled at the corners of his eyes, the tightening in his chest spreading to his throat. He almost screamed at the thoughts that invaded his mind, clawing at his head hoping to get rid of them.

" Zayn! Zayn. Shit!" His eyes widened as he recognised that voice. Breathing deeply, he turned his head towards the source of concern, relief flooding in his veins as he saw the familiar comforting brown eyes.

Liam. He tried to say but his lips weren't working. Sighing, he slumped completely, letting his eyes close in relief.

" Oh my God! Are you okay? The doctor will be here in a second." Liam's voice was heavy with concern. Zayn almost jumped up to hug his best friend but suddenly his body was extensively exhausted and he could hardly keep his eyes open. " Don't you ever do this to me again! Do you know how... how... how bad? I felt when you collapsed like that! You said you were okay! I...I...I don't like you!" His voice cracked at the end.

Zayn coaxed his eyes open letting them fall onto the brown shiny one of his best friend's. Fondness pooled at his stomach as Liam sniffled, swallowing hard. With the tears that flowed from Liam's eyes, the fondness changed itself morphing itself into raw guilt. Guilt, that it hadn't even occurred to him that if he had dreamt it all Liam wasn't real too. He felt an apology at the tip of his tongue but even in the worst state of his mind he knew that it'd be foolish if him to apologise for such a thing.

Tentatively, he reached his hand out to caress the brunette's cheek earning a soft smile. Watching Liam cry was the most heart-wrenching thing Zayn had ever seen. The tears wouldn't stop and his face was getting redder and redder. Every now and then a sob would escape him causing him to bite his lower lip suppressing the ones that followed it. Before he knew it, Zayn was crying himself. The oxygen mask still intact as the doctors checked his vitals telling him one thing or the other about his condition but the only thing he could focus on was Liam. It hadn't even been a year since the two had met but Zayn could see that they both depended on each other more than he had realised. He remembered the first time he had met him in the art class when he saved him from all those girls. He remembered when he came out to him. He remembered the first time he had heard Harry expressing his hatred towards him and how Liam had stayed with him, keeping him from falling apart. All the times he had leaned on Liam when he couldn't go home because he was too scared to face his brother. All the times they messed around playing video games and watching movies and just being themselves. Liam was Zayn's constant star through it all and that might be the reason that he didn't even think that Liam didn't exist.

" I'm sorry, I just can't stop," Liam said chuckling a little. " You don't know what it felt like." Zayn watched him carefully as his face contorted into a serious one, his lower lip quivering. " You just looked so lifeless and I couldn't do anything." He sobbed covering his face with one of his hands. " I thought you were gone. Don't ever do that again or I'll fix you and then kill you myself." He let out a humourless chuckle, wiping his eyes furiously. Zayn shook his head, smiling through his mask. He shuffled a little when he felt Liam's expression changing into a careful one.

" Harry doesn't hate you, Zayn." That was enough for the raven haired lad to go completely rigid. Liam sighed at his reaction. " I know he's stupid and he was an asshole to you but Zayn he never hated you and he can never hate you." Zayn's eyes widened a tad at his friend's words. " Also, he's going to be here.." he was interrupted by the door. " Now. " Slowly he got off the chair and placed a soft kiss on Zayn's forehead. " I'll see you later. " And with that, he was making his way out of the room.

Zayn watched as Harry gave Liam a strange look before settling himself on the chair where the brunette had previously been sitting. The raven haired lad almost closed his eyes pretending to be asleep but something told him it was too late to do that. Breathing deeply, he shook his head as a nurse took off the mask from his face, taking away his only way out of the conversation away with her.

" How are you feeling?" Harry asked, his voice guarded and uncomfortable. Zayn watched as he shifted his legs trying his best to fit them onto the chair before huffing and straightening them against himself. " Zaynie?" Zayn nodded at his previous question his eyes still wide. He swallowed thickly at the awkward atmosphere in the room. " Is the bed comfortable? Do you need the nebuliser? Can you breathe fine? Should I call the doctor? Mum was here too but she went to grab lunch. She'll be here soon. " Zayn almost sighed as the awkwardness dissipated and Harry returned to his original character. " Liam said I hated you. I mean I don't hate you! I mean he said that you said I hated you. You know I don't hate you Zaynie! The only person I hate is myself for believing that bitch! I wish I would've slapped myself then and I mean I can slap myself now. I should slap myself!" Alarmed by his brother's statement Zayn grab hold of his hands looking directly into his eyes before shaking his head. " You know you should hate me. Everyone should hate me I'm the worst brother ever."

" Harry." Zayn croaked out but his brother didn't stop rambling.

" I should've seen it, you know I should've realised. She was playing a game with us and I let her. It's my fault that we're here today. It's my fault that you think that I hate you. I did this." Harry pulled away his hands, tugging at his hairs ferociously.

" Harry!" Zayn all but screamed but his voice betrayed him.

" I wanted to protect you and I wanted to keep you safe but I am the reason you are hurting and I was the reason you had to go through everything." Zayn groaned shifting in his position to reach out to his brother but his body wasn't helping him, completely loose and lax.

" Hawwa!!" The nickname flew out of his lips before he could think about it. A sense of calm washing over him as Harry stopped talking looking at him directly, clearly taken aback. For a second he just looked at Zayn and then started the water works. Gently, he wrapped his arms around his younger brother letting all his emotions loose. He cried and cried until he Zayn could feel the tears leak into his gown clinging to his skin. He just sat there carding a soft hand through the curly hair and letting tears of his own make their way out of his eyes, yet again.

" What did I do, Zaynie? What did I do? I should've never let you go. I should've never done that to you. I wish I was a better brother. I wish I was still Hawwa and we were still little and the world wasn't too big to protect you from. I wish I could've protected you from myself." Zayn felt his heartstrings tugging at his chest as hot tears spilt from his eyes.

" Don't think like that. You did protect me and you do protect me. I would've never made it if it weren't for you, Haz. You are still Hawwa and I'm still Zaynie. The world was always big and you always protected me, you still do Haz. You just don't see it. You being there is enough for me to be strong. I just get scared that I'll lose you like I lost you then." His voice came out firm but low. He sniffled as Harry pulled back slightly, looking directly at him.

" You are the best brother ever Zayn and I can never thank you enough for that. But I promise you that this will never happen again. I promise you that I'll never let anyone come between us. And I will never hurt you ever again." Hardy wiped under his eyes sniffling before placing a soft kiss on Zayn's forehead.

Maybe it was the determination in his words or the genuineness in his green eyes but Zayn knew that Harry was going to keep his promise. A reassurance settled in his heart that this might be the last time that he ever felt uncertain around his brother and if he felt like jumping up and down in joy, nobody could blame him.

+

They had spent the most of the day like that, talking back and forth while the doctor kept tabs on Zayn's breathing. At one point he had to be placed under oxygen again but that was only because the doctors didn't want to risk anything. Their mother had come shortly after they had the heartfelt conversation, barging through the door complaining about how Harry hadn't told her that Zayn was already awake. She had talked Zayn through the precautions that the doctor had already told him, while feeding him the chicken soup that she had herself made. He had laughed at the expression she made when Harry told her that he had hit Lorri. And laughed again when she cursed at the girl, trying to use the worst words possible but from her mouth, it sounded a bit awkward. He was relieved to hear that Lori was in juvenile prison and wouldn't be bothering them anymore. Liam came in the evening again and they played video games for a while but Zayn didn't saw the face he had been dying to see since he woke up, till almost seven.

Zayn had decided to take a nap after his best friend had left and when he woke up he was confused to see a piercing screen looking back at him. It wasn't much of a screen but a projected image as big as the wall in front of him. All the lights in the room were turned off and Zayn could only see the silhouette of a man standing next to the door. In his perplexed state, his heart leapt out of his chest as the man started making his way towards the bed.

" Hi, I am a thief." Zayn exhaled heavily before laughing at the absurdity of his lover's statement. Louis let out a chuckle of his own before dropping on the bed beside him. From the dim light in the room, Zayn could see the creases of Louis' lips as they stretched into a huge smile. " How are you?"

" Better," Zayn answered sitting up a bit. He noticed something in Louis' lap but couldn't point out what it was.

" Good. Now scoot." Louis got up from his place and dropped the thing beside Zayn as the younger lad made space on the bed. Louis climbed beside him and placed the thing on Zayn's lap, which now he discovered were gummy worms. Smiling wide he looked back at the cerulean eyed lad, a giddy feeling in his bones. " Styles' is going to sneak in McDonald's and popcorn until then help yourself with the worms."

Louis placed his arm on his shoulder. Zayn bit his lower lip keeping himself from laughing like a crazy child. The fact that Harry was okay with this and was even helping them out made him want to do the happy dance. And even with all that had happened Louis had brought their date to him and that meant a great deal to Zayn.

" We are watching Me before You," Louis announced casually.

" But it just came out." Zayn almost jumped. He had been waiting to see that movie ever since he had first read the novel.

" I told you I have a sneaky friend and we were going to see it today anyway." Fondness pooled at his stomach and he almost leaned over and hugged Louis.

" Thank-you!" He said out a little too excitedly.

" Anything for you, Zaynie." Louis placed a soft kiss on his cheek before turning on the movie and opening the packet of gummy worms. Zayn didn't divert his gaze from Louis' face. The raven haired lad felt as if he would explode with how much he was feeling. He had never experienced anything as such with anyone ever in his life and even small acts of affection from Louis entranced him. Everything in the world would wither away until there was only Louis in his world. Even hooked up to a monitoring machine in a hospital bed Zayn felt like he was on cloud nine just because Louis was beside him and no one could take that away from him.

" Okay so I was going to wait until this movie was halfway through or something and I know it's cheesy as hell but you looking at me like doesn't help." With that Louis was leaning in and they were kissing. Zayn felt hot all over as Louis cupped his face and kissed him, slow and passionate. When they pulled away his face was burning and he was sure he was blushing madly. Louis was looking at him with a fond expression on his face. " Damn it, I'm too far gone already." Zayn giggled at that, causing Louis to lean in for a kiss again.

Maybe this was the reason that he didn't think about anything but the idea of losing Louis because he craved Louis and he couldn't bear losing him.

+

Hi! RAMADAN MUBARAK!

Life is stupid. Anyways who has read A thousand splendid suns? Cause I'm reading it right now and I need to discuss it with someone as soon as I complete it.

 

How was it( the chapter)? Did you like it? Was it too sad? Lame? I don't know. comment something.

Preach.Read.Comment.vote.


	28. ۲۶

Louis stood under the tree, a secretive smile on his lips. His eyes shifted to the opposite side of the tree landing at the window, a sudden tide of nostalgia enveloping him. His legs itched to climb up the tree, to perch himself on the window before carefully entering the room. A chuckle escaped him as he thought about all the pranks he had planted in that room, how he had waited for them to unfold in front of himself before running back to his car and laughing all the way back to home. With a softness to his motions, he caressed the bark, memories flashing before his eyes. Absurd or not, he wished he could give something to the tree, something to show his gratitude. After all, that tree had led him to, what he proudly called, his life, now.

" Hi, Tommo!" He was brought back to the present by the surprisingly warm voice. From his peripheral vision, he could see the tall figure standing by the window. " I'm sensing a reunion," Harry smiled, letting his gaze fall at the tree. Louis chuckled and hugged the tree playfully, earning a genuine laugh from his former enemy.

" Nah. More like reminiscing." He released the tree, rubbing one of his feet on the ground, both of his hands now secured in his pockets.

Harry gave him an earnest smile and waved him over towards the door. Casually, Louis strolled towards the door the smile still plastered on his face.

He stood outside for a few minutes before Harry opened the door, gesturing him to come in.

" Zayn's asleep but you can come in." Louis examined the door properly, trying to find a sign for any sort of conspiracy against him. He couldn't help himself. The last time the curly-haired lad had invited him in he had ended up covered in sticky goo. Harry laughed at his hesitance, shaking his head a little bit. " You're safe, I promise. No more pranks remember."

Cautiously, Louis entered the door still wary of his former foe's kindness. He sighed when he reached the living room, the reluctance finally lifting off of his posture.

" I swear it's so weird, you being nice to me. I might not ever get used to it." Harry turned to face him his green eyes shining, whimsically.

" Well, you might not have to." He smirked.

" I'm genuinely sorry, Styles, but I'm already in too deep. Can't back out now." Louis retorted with the same playful aura. Green eyes narrowed at him, a deep sentiment within them.

" Well, then I better get this over with." Louis almost frowned at the sigh he let out. " He's my baby brother and he's been hurt too much and I know that I don't deserve to say it but he needs to be cherished and loved. I still don't like you but you make him feel good and I can see that you care about him and that's making you a bit bearable. But.." Louis' stomach dropped at the firmness of his tone. " If you ever hurt him, even a little. Hypocrite or not, I will kill you." By the time he ended his little speech Harry was glaring at Louis, his friendly expression completely darkening into a deadly serious one.

Louis was taken aback at the tone Harry had used with him but it only lasted a few seconds. " You know what? I should hate this I am his elder brother talk but I don't. It's nice seeing the Harry Zayn talks about instead of Harry Styles for once." He was almost sure that Harry would pounce on him, offended by his statement but the curly haired lad only smiled taking Louis by surprise. Suddenly, that guy, the guy he had spent hating the entirety of his high school life wasn't that obnoxious. " Damn, he's rubbing off on me." He stomped on the ground, childishly.

" Well, that's Zayn for you," Harry said, his smile intact.

" So, I'm gonna wake him up now." Louis advanced towards the steps, still looking at Harry.

" He just slept, been working too hard. That art competition is getting to him." Harry shook his head, a fond glint in his eyes.

" But he's perfect. Why is he stressing?" Louis frowned, genuinely confused.

" Go tell him that. Take him out. I don't care, just get him less stressed." He diverted his gaze to the floor, waving at Louis. Louis bit his lower lip trying to keep himself from smiling like an idiot. Nodding furiously, he climbed up the stairs before halting in his steps and retreating back.

" And by the way, we're going to camp this year. " He yelled to a perplexed Harry before moving up on the stairs again.

Almost excitedly he skipped over to Zayn's room, opening the door in a swift motion. The sight that greeted him almost knocked him off his feet. Zayn was laying on the bed, a series of art accessories gathered around him. Louis felt his heart swell with every step he took. The smile on his lips almost threatening to break his face.

" Liam's done and that fourth one is done too." His heart leapt in his chest as Zayn mumbled in his sleep clearly oblivious of the presence beside him.

" Zaynie, get up." His hand caressed the tan cheeks, tracing the dark circles under his eyes, his heart fluttering as his fingers brushed against the eyelashes. " Get up, Zee." He sighed, love struck, almost melting at the adorable sight in front of him.

If someone had asked Louis a year ago that he'd be dating someone as perfect as Zayn he would've slapped them for making fun of his perpetual singleness. Smiling at his own thought he placed a fond kiss on his partner's cheek, promptly waking him up.

Zayn sprang up in his position muttering curses under his breath. " Oh God! I fell asleep. Oh my God!" Louis resisted cooing as he rubbed his eyes with the back of his closed fists. Blearily, he blinked his eyes focussing his gaze on the blue ones directed towards him. " Lou?' Louis gave him an amused smile. " Shit, I need to fix it all." He panicked as he looked at the mess around himself.

" Zayn." Louis tried comforting him but it was of no use. Zayn jumped off the bed, gathering all of the pages on the floor.

" It's tomorrow!" He yelled, pulling at his hair slightly. Louis observed him as he threw all the pages that he had gathered on the floor before focusing his eyes on him. " It's your fault!"

" What?" Louis raised one of his eyebrows, questioningly.

Zayn heaved a huge sigh, throwing his head back. " I've done everyone. Why can't I draw you, Lou?" Louis frowned at the helpless tint to his tone.

" Zaynie.." He started but was soon interrupted by a pair of hands cupping his face.

" You're so perfect. I can't capture you on a page." Louis swallowed hard as Zayn's wide eyes examined his face from every angle possible, fascination glazing them. The feathery haired lad had to blink a few times to come back to his senses.

" But you've done it before, so many times." He caressed the back of Zayn's hand, almost humming in content.

" Those were not perfect," Louis whined as he withdrew his hands back placing them on his head, a cute pout situated on his lips.

" Zayn what are you talking about?" Louis stood up to meet his eyes directly.

" I can never get the glint in your eyes right." Zayn tilted his head a little to the side, looking at him adorably.

" What?" Subconsciously, Louis squinted his eyes, almost trying to look at his eyes.

Completely ignoring his lover's antics Zayn stomped on the floor, shaking his head furiously. " OMG! I'm never gonna get it right!"

" Zayn, stop right now." Louis reprimanded him. " Come on," He took his hand and led him to his cupboards.

" What are you doing?" Louis went through the drawers, piling up one thing after another. " I have so much to do?" Zayn whined, jumping beside him. When Louis was content with what he had, he led them back to the bed sitting Zayn down. The younger lad looked at him puzzled, as Louis placed a jumper over his head before passing it through his arms like a toddler.

" Lou!" He protested when Louis bent down putting a pair of white socks on his feet but Louis paid him no mind. Crossing his arms across his chest he huffed as Louis placed a beanie on his head, pulling at it a bit so that his ears were covered.

" Beanie, Socks, jumper check. Now get up we're going out." Zayn opened his mouth to complain but completely shut up when Louis spoke again. " There is a new bookstore in the city and I just thought that maybe you'd like to go but it's fine I can go by myself." His brown eyes widened and he sprang up from the bed.

" No, I'll go," Louis smirked at his reaction, shaking his head fondly.

To say that Zayn in a bookstore was like a child in the candy store wouldn't be that wrong. Louis had never seen something even remotely as heart melting as that. The raven haired lad jumped from shelf to shelf a perpetual smile on his face. His amber eyes were wide with glee as he checked out books after books, picking them gently as if they were fragile, stroking the covers with soft movements. Every second he'd tell Louis to take him back home or he'd die before going back to fawning over the books. At one point Louis heard him squealing, jumping up and down, a teal book clutched to his chest. The cerulean eyed lad couldn't be so sure about was breathing in that moment.

" Lou! It's Fangirl!" Louis gave him a huge smile walking over to his hyperventilating partner. " Look at this! It's real! In paperback and in my hands!" He swooned, an excited jerk to his movement.

" It's pretty." Louis supplied, not sure on what to say.

" It's the best novel ever! " Zayn said before starting to tell him about the characters and events and the beautiful quotes. Louis didn't stop him, he didn't even tell him that he had said that about every single novel that they had came across in that one hour. Instead, he stayed quiet, marvelling at the sight before him. He wished he could freeze that moment and absorb the brightness that radiated out of the younger lad's smile. " I'll have to come back here to buy this."

" Why?" Louis took the book from his hands already moving towards the counter.

" I forgot my wallet. Louis, what are you doing?" Louis picked up all the books that he had seen Zayn looking at piling them up one by one and moving towards the counter.

" I'm giving them a good home." Louis placed a soft peck on his lips. Zayn shook his head, his cheeks turning a bright shade of red.

On the walk back to Zayn's home, Louis stopped for hot chocolate laughing at Zayn's hesitance when he gave him his cup. Smiling he assured the younger lad that he wouldn't spill it on his novels eventually having to share his own drink with him. Zayn laughed when he dropped his cup spilling it all over his sweater, his tongue peeking out of his teeth. And Louis tackled him when he tried to race him back which ended in a heavy make out session. By the time they reached home Zayn was completely relaxed and he knew what face of Louis he was going to draw, his fingers already itching to get it out.

He had decided to capture the moment where Louis was looking at him, not an ounce of judgement on his face only love because that was his favourite face on Louis. Louis liked Zayn for all that he was, flaws included and that sparked something in his heart, something he hadn't felt ever before.

Love

+

Hi, guys! How is everyone? Watching the summer time ball? The vamps are on right now and I'm waiting for Zayn since Black Magic came on( the warm up one.) Anyways, I have classes at 5 am till 10 am and I sleep almost all day after that and That's the reason for late updates. I have decided to complete this story before anything else because life is unpredictable and I just want to get this done.

If anyone reads electral love, I'm thinking to take it off till I sort out the plot for it because my co-author might've ditched me. I dunno she is unreachable and it's fucking my mind. 

This chapter is dedicated to bizexual because she's awesome and her comments make me smile big. 

cute? rushed? Tell me what you like about it.

Comment.Read.Vote.Preach.

Love, Sara.


	29. ۲۷

' They're all dumb people Zaynie. They don't know shit about art. You could've sketched a blob of poo and told them it was art they would've believed you. ' 

 

He smiled as Louis' words echoed in his head, the jitter in his spine calming a bit.

' Just breathe and find me in the crowd and I'll wiggle my eyebrows for you.' 

 

Suppressing a chuckle he let his eyes roam over the crowd smiling when he found the shining blue ones. He almost lost it right there when Louis wiggled his eyebrows giving him a cheeky smile but then his brain decided it was a good time to remind him of the enormity of the audience that sat in front of him, expecting him to give a well-rehearsed speech about his drawings. His smile faltered, breath hitching in his throat. Suddenly, it was too hot for him and very single person was trying to see through him stripping him off his walls one by one, trying to reach to his deepest secrets. He rubbed his palms over his thighs before placing them on both sides of the podium, leaning on it a bit.

' Imagine they are naked, Zee.' 

 

He couldn't help but giggle at that. Louis had given him the most serious look he could muster when he said that. Zayn had laughed, quite loudly too, but Louis just shook his head saying how it had worked every time for him.

He looked back at the onlookers who were giving him a strange look. He let out another giggle earning a frown from one of the judges sitting almost at his feet.

 

" I'm sorry I was just really nervous for this and my boyfriend told me to imagine everyone naked and I don't really think it works. " He let out looking directly at Louis, whose eyes widened a little before he burst out laughing. From his peripheral vision, Zayn noticed that everyone else was laughing too but he was too absorbed in those hypnotising blue eyes to notice anyone else.

" We were supposed to portray the beauty of the world and what we like about it through our drawings and I'm seeing a lot of drawings related to nature or the creations but mine is a bit different. Nature is just not my world and I just wanted to stay true to myself." He let his eyes roam over the judges once and the interest in their gestures made him want to say more. " My world is my family and that's what my drawings are about." Pride burst through his heart when one of the judges gave him a genuine smile and after that little gesture of appreciation, the words just came out him with a steady flow. " The first one is my mum and I hope you can see it. Her caring personality with a blanket of firmness around it. She's the most inspiring person I have ever come across. She gives me the will to fight against the world and stand by who we love and that's what I love about her." He ended his description looking back at his mother, his throat closing up a bit at the tears that cascaded down her cheeks. " Next is Harry, my brother. One thing I love about him is how he wants to protect me from the world and the harms within it. He's always there trying to pave my way so I could go through it without any hardships. Life can never knock him down because he will always find a way to conquer it and always find his way back to me and that's what I love about him." He knew he was almost on the verge of tears but at that point, he didn't really care. It wasn't a matter of public demonstration anymore it was closer to home now. Sniffling, he wiped one of his hand under his eyes trying to school his expression. " Then there's Liam, my best friend. I love how he tried so hard to make everything so dramatic." He chuckled when the crowd laughed, sizing Liam up who looked at him with mock disapproval. " He's the most honest person I've ever met and he's done so much for me in the short time we have been together and I wish that everyone in this world had a friend like him." Liam was blushing now, waving at him fondly. " Last but not the least. It's my boyfriend Louis." There was a short pause after that as he looked back at the sketch he drew before looking back at the real person, smiling at the goofy expression on his face. The next was basically word vomit. " He's the most genuine person on the earth and without him, my life would be incomplete. I love him for accepting me for who I am." Their eyes stayed glued to each other, affection blazing in them. 

 

Zayn didn't account for what happened next. He didn't know when he got off the stage or if he had impressed the judges or not. He didn't know what his family said. The only thing he knew was that he was standing outside with Louis' arms around him and lips pressed to his forehead.

" Was that your way of asking me out?" Louis asked him pulling away from his forehead to directly look at him. 

 

Still pumped from the talking Zayn giggled letting his mouth roam dangerously close to his boyfriend's lips. " You weren't going to label it anytime soon were you?"

" Yeah. I've thought about it so much that I started believing that we already were boyfriends." Louis brought him closer squeezing his arms lightly.

 

" I think I said too much today," Zayn said feeling drained all of a sudden.

" Well, I'm glad you said it," Louis mumbled in his ear before pulling back to kiss him properly.

 

And that was when Zayn decided that some days talking was worth it.

+  
A/N I can't believe how short this is. I don't think I've ever posted something this short. Also sometimes I sit down and take a minute to get it through my head that this is coming to an end. I am a sad sad person.  
I have Carry On now! In paperback and I am dying!  
Comment. Read. Vote. Preach.


	30. ۲۸

" Come on, Zaynie, just a few more minutes till we get to the top." Zayn stopped for a brief moment and breathed deeply before looking back at his best friend. The altitude was pressing onto his chest making it slightly harder to breathe. He knew if he didn't stop for a few seconds every now and then he'd possibly have another flare and that wouldn't end well for anyone.

 

It wasn't ideal for him, the trek up to the mountain top just to set up a tent and spend a few nights in it. In fact, he would've never agreed to it if it weren't for Liam.

" It's your first year, Zaynie and we have exams after this. I need it Zaynie. Please don't say no." He had said the day before, his brown eyes pleading. And if there was one thing Zayn couldn't refuse to was Liam's puppy dog eyes. 

Sighing, Zayn had nodded causing his friend to smother him with those infamous hugs.

So that's how Zayn ended up following a bunch of students up the mountain in the search of a perfect spot to set their tents.

" I don't want you to fall behind, Zee. This place is dangerous." Zayn frowned at him, still trying to restore his breath. He looked as all the attention was now at Niall, everyone waiting for him to elaborate.

" Dangerous how, Niall?" Oliver asked the blonde, who had taken the responsibility of a guide for the whole trip. Niall looked at him questionably.

" You don't know, mate?" His voice came out surprised. Zayn shivered contemplating what the older lad was talking about, unconsciously his feet moved forward taking him to where the crowd was gathered now. " I've heard bears roam around here. Huge bears." He said spookily.

" What kinda bears?" Liam moved closer to Zayn keeping a close eye on him. Niall looked confused for a second before he blurted out.

" You know the ones Emmet ate in 'Twilight'. Yeah, those." He looked unsure, but Zayn was too captured by the idea of bears roaming around them, to see it.

" Grizzly bears." Liam let out more like a whisper. He seems withdrawn, far away from where they actually were.

" He doesn't eat them, Niall. He drinks blood from them. " Elijah corrected

" Same difference." Niall muttered. " Now stay close everyone we don't want to lose any lives here." A tremor of fear passed through Zayn's spine. 

" You okay?" Liam placed his arm around his shoulder dragging him alongside him. Shivering, Zayn nodded trying to fall into his pace. " You know it's probably just a rumour. I mean if there were bears we wouldn't be here right?" It seemed as if he was trying to convince himself more than anything.

" Yeah." Zayn breathed, deeply, trying to lighten the pressure of lack of oxygen on his chest. Liam halted in his steps, sizing him up properly before asking.

" You said heights were always a problem. Do you think you can make it up there? I could carry you." Zayn smiled at him fondly and shook his head. He had been like that ever since the visit to the hospital. Zayn understood his concern, he did and it was comforting to know that someone was there keeping tabs on him, which he clearly was incapable of himself. What he didn't like was the uncertainty in Liam's eyes when he told him he's okay. It felt as if the brunette wasn't sure if he was telling him the truth or if he was trying not to worry him but still Liam never stopped asking him.

" I'm fine. We're almost there anyway." He let his lips curve into a smile. 

" Yeah, lets go then." Liam placed his arm back and both of them followed their peers at a slower but firm pace. Zayn still had to stop for a few minutes here and there but they were food at catching up.

Soon they were standing at a place which Niall had regarded as the best camping site ever. Personally Zayn didn't get what was so good about camping. He was lost on why people would like to spend a few nights at a place where they wouldn't have a proper bed, were bound to get cold and there weren't even washrooms there. But he was hardly an outdoor man so he wouldn't know.

They had partnered up to get their tents up before night fall. Liam had found a place with mostly level ground and they had started setting up the tent. Liam had reassured Zayn almost twenty times in that hour that he had it under control. That he was born for stuff like this and it wasn't even hard. Zayn had sat a little further, next to a tree, the instructions manual in his hand. As he read through the first few pages he had came to know that Liam in fact didn't had it under control. He was doing almost everything wrong but the determination in his brown eyes stopped Zayn from saying anything. So like the good friend he was he waited for him to completely mess it up before he could come in and save the day.

" Tada!" Liam jumped, ecstatic. Zayn smiled at his enthusiasm but couldn't help the chuckles that escaped him when he saw the tent. It was a complete mess. Liam giggled a knowing look in his eyes. He rubbed the back of his neck drifting his gaze from his best friend to the tent and then back.

" It's good." Zayn suppressed a giggle, his eyes shining. Liam talked over to him slumping down beside him. Pouting he rested his head on his bony shoulder.

" Now work your magic and fix this before Niall comes." He let out solemnly as Zayn patted his hair, his body vibrating with every giggle that passed his lips.

" Okay but you gotta help me." Liam looked at him the pout still sitting on his lips.

" Of course, why is that even a question?" Zayn shook his head at him before getting off of the ground. He tucked the instructions under his armpit and made his way towards the tent trying to take it apart little by little. They struggle they had to go through, in order to take it apart, made Zayn doubt his decision of sitting quiet the first time. 

Eventually, they had successfully built their tent but it made them exhausted. It was already dark and they were sprawled out beside the tent. They had stayed like that for a while before Liam bursted out laughing causing Zayn to laugh with him.

" What's so funny?" Zayn asked clutching his stomach.

" I don't know." Liam laughed harder, tears leaking out his eyes.

" Then why are you laughing?" Zayn sat up now his lungs constricting with every laugh, hitting his ribs.

" I don't know!" Liam sprang up from his position and started running a hand balanced on his back. Zayn collapsed back laughing harder at the mad run. " Stop laughing Zayn. My back hurts now! Oh my, God, I'm gonna die laughing." Liam kept running and Zayn couldn't stop laughing until the point where he wasn't even laughing anymore, only scrunching his face strangely his legs wildly kicking the air.

At some point Liam calmed down and came back to his place beside his friend.

" You're mad, Li," Zayn said between the residual giggles.

" I might be." His response was so comical that Zayn almost started laughing again but the shooting pain in his ribs reminded him to breath through the laughs. " I want to tell you something." Zayn cleared his throat trying to pull a serious expression but still laughing between intervals.

" Yeah?" He urged the brunette genuinely interested at the anxiousness in his voice.

" You know how I told you about.." Liam had only started when Niall came for them.

" Why the fuck aren't you out front yet? I thought I told everyone to come there when they were done with the tent." The blonde gave them an uncharacteristically stern look. Zayn shuffled off the ground, Liam following suit.

" We just got it done." He explained.

" What?" Niall looked at them in disbelief. " Three fucking hours to get a tent done. What are you guys? Daft?" His eyebrows were scrunched together, a frown evident on his lips.

" Kind of." Liam let out earning a chuckle from his best friend.

" Anyways, the bonfires ready. Everybody's waiting. Let's go." He gestured towards the main site before leading the way. Liam and Zayn followed him sheepishly, chuckling at absolutely nothing on the way.

For a second Zayn though of what Liam had to tell him but then they were sitting near the warm bonfire and the smores were enough to keep his mind occupied. well that was until Niall decided it was cool to start talking about all the bears that might be out for blood.

 

" I swear I've heard they can swallow up an entire person without chewing. " He said with his eyes wide. Zayn bit through another one of the sticky goodness completely ignoring his brothers best friend.

" Niall, I'm pretty sure those are Anacondas," Stephanie said rolling her eyes. 

" Shhhh...What do you know about them Steph? What do any of us know about them." He said with such confidence that almost everyone tuned in to his conversation.

" So what are you saying?" Liam asked miserably trying to school his expressions.

" I'm saying that they are ruthless and brutal and they will eat you. I've heard that they smell fear so there's no need to be scared. If you come across one you might want to play dead cause then they won't kill you. They don't eat dead meat. Only fresh. They can come out of anywhere. Anywhere." Zayn frowned at his emphasis on the specific word. He should've figured it out. He was smart enough to, but the smores were so distracting.

So when the screaming started it was a big surprise for him. Subconsciously, he had directed his gaze to where everyone was looking, half a store still in his hand. It was like a tide of fear came and drenched him in its wake. 

" Fuck! Run!" From his peripheral vision he saw as everyone ran away but he still couldn't move looking at the beast standing dangerously close to him. It was a bear, a huge bear.

In a haze of fear, Zayn ran for his life, but unlike everyone sane person, he ran towards the bonfire instead of away from it. 

" Zayn!" Liam shrieked leaping towards his friend but was soon stunned to the ground as the bear ran towards the younger lad but instead of attacking him it pulled it away from the fire hugging it close to his chest. The brunette blinked his eyes rapidly, unsure if he was hallucinating or not.

Zayn was in shock his breathing rapid and his vision blurring on the edges. All he could think was he was going to die and a painful death at that. 

" What the hell, Zayn?" He swore he heard Louis but he wasn't anywhere near him so maybe he was in his head, scolding him at the way he decided to die. " Are you okay?"

" What the fuck, Louis?!" Liam stomped over to the bear pulling his mask of giving Zayn a reason to frown at.

" Did the bear ate Louis and now he's in the bear?" Zayn voiced his thoughts earning an odd look from his boyfriend.

" Did he hit his head?" Harry asked leaning close to his brother confusing the younger lad even more. 

" He ate Haz too." Zayn said as is eyes roamed at the costume that covered Harry's body. His eyes watered slightly before he started to hyperventilate.

" How much sugar did you gave him?" Harry asked while leading them back to the log they had been sitting on. 

" Me? You asshole it's all your fault and yours!" Liam pointed at Harry and then at Louis accusingly. He was fuming. " Zee, look at me. Nobody ate nobody. There isn't a bear. Louis' and Harry are the bears." He cupped his face trying to get it through him.

" Harry and Louis are bears?" Zayn said his tone completely unsure. " But they are human." Louis cooed at the innocence in that statement.

" Babe we were just playing a prank. There are no bears, this is a costume." He pulled off his bear dress and tossed it away before sitting beside his boyfriend's again. " See. Are you okay?" Louis waited for Zayn to show any sort of response but the raven-haired lad stayed quiet just gazing at him dreamily. Louis leaned in to kiss him but was stopped when he slapped him across his face. Louis groaned, surprised.

" I thought no more pranks!" He scolded a hint of anger flashing in his eyes. Huffing, he crossed his arms against his chest completely ignoring his sharp breathing. Louis chuckled rubbing his cheek. 

" Oh, babe..." He started as everyone dispersed and found themselves seats.

" No! I hate you!" Zayn knew he was getting worked up but he was mad at Louis.

" You must, jumping into the fire like that. What were you thinking?" Louis reached into the pocket of his lover's jacket where he had placed the inhaler himself that afternoon.

" Dressing as a bear. What were you thinking?" Zayn retorted, pouting.

" I'm sorry, love. I promise I won't do it again. Now let's breathe." Zayn tried his hardest to keep his stance when Louis took off the lid shaking it slightly and waiting for Zayn to exhale completely.

" I know how to use it!" He tried to snatch it from Louis, his hands trembling as he extended them to get to him but Louis only pulled himself further away.

" Yeah but I should know too." Zayn wanted to retort back with 'do you have breathing issues?' but he kept his mouth shut when he spotted the sincerity in his gestures.

" Yeah especially if you keep scaring me like this." And with that he finally let Louis help him with the inhaler, blushing even though he was trying hard to stay mad at him.

" You know I was thinking and I've decided that I'll ask you someday." Louis said while maneuvering him between his legs, placing both of his hand on his loud chest.

" What?" Zayn asked. Too drained to remind himself that he was mad at the other lad, he let his head fall onto his chest soaking in the warmth that his body provided.

" I'll ask you to be my boyfriend." Zayn frowned at that. Had they not settled that already? " I mean you asked me out in your own way but I'll ask you out in my own way. I mean we're still boyfriends but I just want to ask you out my way. That way well both get to ask each other out." Zayn smiled at that. He didn't really understand it all but what he knew was that it was important to Louis and that meant he was important to Louis.

" Okay?" He looked at Harry who was sitting across from him with Liam under one of his arms. Zayn frowned at their intimacy but then his mind led him back to the previous events where Liam had wanted to tell him something. Maybe this was it. A droopy smile made its way over his lips as he gave Liam a knowing look before letting his eyes shut. 

After that, he was in a state between dreaming and wakefulness. He couldn't tell if he was right but he had heard Louis and Harry explaining it to their juniors to keep up their legacy of pranks and to never let it die. They told them that it was a farewell prank and Niall said that it was the prank of the year. He also heard Liam screaming at him for knowing all along. But Zayn couldn't be sure about it all. The only thing he was sure about were the gentle kisses Louis laid at his forehead and on his face.

And that was the only thing that kept him from concluding that he was surrounded by lunatics.  
+  
Hi! I read 'carry on' today and I am just buzzing from it. I couldn't help but squeal throughout most of it. I wanted to portray Lirry at last but I don't think I did a good job at it. Also I laughed when when Liam had a laughing fit. I'm mad! Also I need someone to tell my mum to get of my case, she stresses me out.  
Comment guys.   
Preach.Vote.Comment.Read


	31. ۲۹

Zayn was sitting on the kitchen island, watching Harry construct the club sandwiches.

" Are you and Liam going out now?" curiosity dripped out his voice. He looked directly at Harry trying to detect a response. The older lad halted in his movements a bright smile poking its way to his lips. A strange happiness pooled in Zayn's stomach and he almost jumped off the island only to be stopped by Harry's strong grasp around his waist.

" Zaynie! No jumping off the island!" Harry scolded him pushing him back before resuming his work. " And yes." Zayn squealed at that, leaping over to land a kiss on his cheek. " Let me rephrase that. No jumping at all!" His older brother tried to keep a straight face, the corner of his lips betraying him every few seconds. Zayn snickered earning a playful glare which only made him laugh.

Honestly, he was extremely happy for his brother. The curly haired lad had finally found someone who could make him smile like a goof and keep him sane all at the same time. And the best part was that someone was his best friend who Zayn trusted with all his life. He wouldn't have to worry about anymore Loris, His brother was Happy and Liam would have more reasons to visit him. So, it was actually a pretty good situation for him. The only thing that irked him was

" Why didn't you tell me?" That. Everytime Zayn had fantasised about the possible relationship between his brother and his best friend, he had been the first one to know about it. It was either Liam gushing about to him or Harry just confessing with all the jumbled words. However, he had never expected to ask them to get the news.

" Since, when do you care about who I date?" Harry cut the crust of the bread before placing them with all the crust-less ones, his eyes not once meeting his brother's gaze.

" Since, he's my best friend and you guys didn't tell me anything and I don't like that." Zayn crossed his arms over his chest, a pout settling itself on his lips.

" Well, I'd tell you if you weren't so busy with lover boy." Zayn frowned at the nickname his brother had started using for his boyfriend. He shook his head, letting his arms hang loosely around his torso.

" Harry, I am not too busy with Louis." His words came out defensive. Harry stopped to look at him, one of his eyebrows raised questioningly. Coincidentally, his phone buzzed at that exact moment signalling that he had gotten a message. He swiped the lock before looking at the contact, a blush spreading under his skin as he saw Louis name bold on the screen.

" And you were saying?" Harry chuckled making Zayn pout.

" Okay maybe I am but I always have time for you, Haz." He reached his hand to grasp the larger one caressing it softly, a semi-guilty expression on his face.

" It's fine, Zee. I don't even know why I said that." Harry smiled at him shaking his hand firmly but Zayn shook his head pulling him towards himself.

" No," He gulped shaking his head." I want you to know that you and me," he pointed first towards him and then himself. " We go way back. Way before Louis. You're my brother. My Hawwa. My idol. You made life 'life' when it was hell and you didn't let my childhood get spoiled because of our conditions and I might not say it or show it much but I love you for that and I always will." Zayn nodded at the end leaning in to hug his brother, Harry following into his actions. The curly haired lad was smiling so big, he thought his face would break. He knew how hard it was for Zayn to express his emotions, verbally and if this was what would happen if they kept Louis around, Harry would give up everything for it.

" I love you more." Harry pulled away placing a soft kiss on his forehead, the smile still sketched on his face. Zayn smiled back at him and Harry's heart swelled at the crinkle in those amber eyes that danced around, signalling the true happiness that Zayn felt. The happiness that Harry had been trying to give back to him since he brought him back.

" Aww." Their moment ended when Liam's camera flashed at them, causing them to look at him, questioningly. " You know what, Zee? I always thought you were biassed about Harry but now I see it. The Harry you know, I know him too now and I think I might like that Harry a bit too much." Liam blushed making his way towards his boyfriend, a fond look in his eyes. Harry walked closed the gap between them wrapping his arms around the younger lad.

" Okay, I'm out of here." The urge to smother both of them with silly questions was powerful he still wanted to give them a little privacy. When his feet hit the floor, his legs were wobbly for a bit but then he straightened them running out of the kitchen.

" What did I say about jumping Zayn!" Harry yelled after him but he only chuckled as a response. As he made his way through the lounge to the stairs, he heard an odd ringing. Moving closer to the sound, he soon realised that it was the landline.

" Mum." He called out but then remembered she had gone out for the employee party thing. For a second he contemplated on his options, he was tempted to call Harry out but he couldn't be that cruel. Also, the chances of him walking into a groping fest were high and he didn't want to be traumatised. He could also call Louis and he knew the other lad wouldn't even question it but even while thinking of it, he knew it was an incredibly silly idea.

Sighing heavily he picked up the call.

" Hello, it's Styles' Residence." He called out, internally laughing at the way his voice sounded.

" Zayn." And with that one word Zayn felt as if his world had turned upside down. His heart trembled, fear building up in his veins.

" Dad." He whispered, his mind rewinding itself to the time he had last seen him. Fear crept up his body reaching up to his throat in the form of the coarse lump. He closed his eyes, his breath hitching at the face that flashed underneath his eyelids.

" Thank God it's you." Zayn frowned at the tone, thinking that he had just mistakenly assumed someone decent as his dad. They just had a striking resemblance to their voice because it could never be his father. He wasn't this civil. " I know I'm the last person you want to talk to and I understand that. You have every right to feel that way but I have to say it." It was all said in one breath and if Zayn weren't that alert, he wouldn't have ever been able to decipher it. " I am getting better and I know it's hard to believe but I am. I haven't taken a sip of alcohol since the day they caught me and I am getting better. But.." There was long pause followed by a quivering voice. " There's a whole where my heart's supposed to be and it isn't letting me live. I don't deserve to live. I know I don't but my therapist said that if I wanted to start off fresh I had to apologise to you and that's what I am doing." Zayn gaped at the statement, too shocked to even react. " I've tried reaching out to your mum and Harry but they don't respond and that's exactly what I deserve. You have every right not to forgive me but I'm sorry, Zayn." His voice was heavy now, the tears clear in his tone. " I can see what I did and I've ruined so much that it's impossible to fix it. I'm sorry for everything I've ever done to you. For every mark on your body, for every bruise that I caused. For all the pain. For the time I tried to force myself on you. God, I'm the worst father." His father sobbed, causing tears of his own to prick the corner of his eyes. " Hell, I'm the worst person to walk the face of the earth and I don't deserve it but I'm asking for your forgiveness. I'm so so sorry."

For a few minutes, Zayn had just stood there listening to his father crying heavily. He accounted for the tears that left his eyes cascading down his face and into his shirt before he spoke up.

" You know what? I never thought I'd ever be able to forgive you. I thought I couldn't forgive you because you took away my happiness. Because you never thought I was your son. Because you thought I was a mistake." He shuddered at his own word, before continuing. "But you know what? Because of you today I know what real people are like. Because of you, I have people now that love me and I know to appreciate them. Because of you, I cherish every single second of life. Because of you, I know what life truly is and it's not what you made me believe. It's beautiful and worth living." His breathing was heavy now. " I forgive you. I forgive you." And he truly did. With those last words, he put the phone back on the receiver, his heart heavy with emotions.

He wasn't sure if what he did was right but he was sure about one thing.

With the words that he had spoken, he hadn't let his father free instead, he had let himself free.

+

Guess whose net died? MINE!

Anyways cry if you want to cause I might've. Hit me up with comments cause I'll need them when I'm going through withdrawal.

Love you, all! I have an exam in the morning pray for me!


	32. ۳۰

Zayn slumped in his chair as he heard the door to his room open yet again. 

" Zayn." Exams were around the corner and his brother wouldn't just leave him alone. 

" Haz, I told you I don't want food. It makes me squeamish." Zayn exclaimed hitting his head on the study table in front of him. He really needed Harry to get off his case if he were to pass his exams with good grades.

" Louis' here." That managed to get him up and onto his feet. He swayed a little at the jerk movement before getting his bearings. Harry stood at his door, one of his eyebrows raised. 

" What?" Zayn questioned, shrugging. Harry just shook his head smiling at him.

" And you say you're not biassed. " He cocked his eyebrow further, giving him a dismissive look. " Anyways waiting in the dressing room, dressed up and all." 

" Dressed up?" Zayn asked, tilting his head a bit. Why was Louis dressed up? Before Harry could answer his question footsteps were heard and soon the source stood beside Harry.

" Styles, I thought you were getting him for me." Louis mocked impatience. " Woah? What is this? The nerd zone?" His eyes widened as he took in the state of his boyfriend's room. Zayn's gaze travelled around the room a blush creeping it way up to the back of his neck. There were books scattered everywhere, paper sheets lying here and there, the bed unmade and the table lamp on even though it was almost afternoon.

" Hi, Louis." Zayn's voice came out sheepish. 

" Best of luck getting him out of here." Harry clicked his tongue before   
walking out, leaving the two lovers alone with their mess. ( Well, technically Zayn's mess.) 

Zayn gave Louis a once over, his face burning into a blush but for a different reason. Louis looked handsome. Harry was right when he had said he was dressed up. The cerulean eyed lad was wearing a blazer for god sakes and his usually messed up hair was slicked back into a classier hairstyle. Zayn couldn't help but stare at him.

" Come on, Zaynie." The younger lad was too lost in the beauty that was his boyfriend that he didn't saw him coming closer to him until he was dragging him towards his cupboards. Coming back to his surroundings Zayn sighed at what he knew was to come. 

" What are you doing?" He asked regardless.

" Getting you dressed." And that made him sigh because his suspicion had been right. " It's date day." Louis beamed at him before proceeding to raid his cupboards.

" Why do you never tell me about these date days?" Zayn asked stomping on the ground resembling a toddler. Louis gave him a stern look.

" Yeah, last time I did that, you ended up in a hospital. So, no thank you." He scoffed. Zayn gasped at his words narrowing his eyes.

" Hey!" He objected placing both of his hands on his hips.

" I'd love to argue about it but it's date day and times running away." Louis made a sign in the air before taking Zayn's hand and placing a white t-shirt on it. 

" But I have to study." Zayn protested, swaying a little as Louis laid clothes after clothes into his hands.

" Oh come on! I've let you live in this nerd hole for so long I forgot what you looked like. Besides, I've already planned it. Now are you going to get dressed or am I going to have to do that too?" Zayn sighed accepting his defeat earning a fond smile from his boyfriend.

" I'm going." He tottered away balancing the huge pile, on his weak arms. 

After almost two minutes of dressing up and ten minutes of smothering him with warm clothes, they were out on the street, where Louis had decided they would be taking a romantic walk. The older lad had one of his arms wrapped around his boyfriend's shoulder keeping him closer to his chest.

It was a fairly windy day, which meant that it would rain if not that day then the next.

" It's gonna rain soon." Zayn voiced out his thoughts bringing both of his hand to his mouth and breathing into them. Louis merely smiled at him and said.

" It's going to be a perfect day. The rain will just have to wait." His cerulean eyes glinting, happily. 

Zayn didn't spoke after that, too busy trying to tame the blush that burned his cheeks. Eventually, his mind shifted back to all the chapters that he hadn't even touched and all the ones that he had been revising, anxiety getting the best of him. Soon he was revising all that he had learned that day, repeating it in his head, getting shit scared for a brief moment where he thought he had forgotten it all and then slumping in relief when his mind started working again. Louis had stayed quiet too, letting himself relax, assuming that his boyfriend was doing the same until Zayn started mumbling the chapter names and notes and soon the older lad caught up to the situation. He completely halted in his steps tapping at the back of Zayn's head.

" You are studying on date day? What kind of boyfriend are you, Zee?" His eyes were wide, tone drenched in disbelief. Zayn gave him an apologetic look taking his hand in his own, caressing it softly.

" I'm sorry, Lou. I just can't get it out of my head." The younger lad stated, truthfully, letting his head hang low. 

" Hey," Louis poked his cheek forcing him to look up at him. " This date is supposed to be a break for you." He placed a gentle kiss on his forehead before placing his arm back on his shoulder and resuming their walk. " Let's talk about the last novel you read." Zayn's eyes lighted up at that.

" You sure. I tend to get lost in them and end up talking too much about them." He asked for confirmation.

" Yeah, I love when you talk about your novels," Louis exclaimed shifting his gaze towards the road.

And that was enough for Zayn to start talking. The last one he had read was ' Carry on' and he told Louis how Baz had been kidnapped and Simon had been worried sick about him, still justifying it as the fear of the unknown attack but how deeply in love was Baz with Simon. He told him that Agatha was a bitch and Simon was visited by Baz's mum and his own. Louis laughed when Zayn shrieked about how Simon never found out that it was his mum that had visited him and called him his 'rosebud boy'. Apparently, the mage was Simon's real dad and he was a power hungry douchebag and Simon was not the chosen one. Louis was surprised that Zayn didn't even get flustered when he told him that he would've loved if there had been more fluff between the two boyfriends, more than those few kisses they shared in completely weird situations. The humdrum was actually a hole and Simon had given him all his magic ( Louis had earned a hug out of that one.) And at the end, he lost his magic and was left with a pair of wings, an odd tail and depression but he had Baz to help him through it all. Eventually, the younger lad started talking about 'fangirl' and his boyfriend listened never once complaint that he had already told him the story twice.

Louis wasn't lying when he said that he loved when Zayn talked about his novels. He truly did. There was a freeness to his speech when he spoke about them, the filter to between his brain and mouth completely disconnected and the words spraying themselves out haphazardly. His eyes shone with excitement and his gestures animated as he talked about them with a passion that Louis had never seen before. It was honestly the most endearing sight Louis had ever seen. So he didn't mind listening to Zayn as he went about his novels reliving through them and passing second-hand feels to Louis as he got to know of all the characters.

" You know, Lou. I used to wish that I had a real life Levi of my own but I don't need him now. You're better than a real life Levi." That statement from his boyfriend managed to knock his breath completely. Louis knew Zayn so he knew how big of a compliment that was. His could feel his heart bursting out in the form of the bright smile on his face as he leaned down to kiss him.

Zayn giggled as he pulled away, hiding his face in the broader chest. 

" Damn it," Louis muttered, impulsively.

" What?" Zayn questioned.

" Nothing, I'll tell you later. Now let's find us a good restaurant to eat." 

The feathery haired lad said before looking around in search of a suitable place. " How about Chinese?" 

" Lou, it's only 5. I don't want to eat right now." Zayn said, his head still in Louis' chest as the wind got a little harsher.

" Oh don't worry we aren't gonna eat." He frowned at the nonchalance in his boyfriend's tone. The urge to question about his intentions was high but before he could comprehend he was being dragged to a cosy Chinese place right along the street. 

Once settled Louis had called for the waitress, urgently. 

" We'll have a large order so keep up with me okay?" Zayn raised his eyebrows at the professional tone which soon morphed into a semi-worried frown as Louis ordered almost everything off of the menu. 

" Lou?" He questioned when the waitress was gone. Louis hushed him, placing a finger over his lips.

" Is she looking at us, Zee?" Zayn tilted his head peeking through Louis' side to see the waitress smiling at them with all of her teeth exposed.

" Yeah?" It came out more like a question than a statement. " Lou, why did you...??"

" Zee get up casually and just get on my back. Act normal okay!" Louis explained to him frantically before getting up and getting on his knees.

" Lou." Zayn got up hesitantly, unsure of his boyfriend's behaviour.

" On my back, Zee." Tentatively Zayn got on his back and clasped his arms around his neck and his legs around his waist. " Hold your breath." And again before he could ask, they were running out of the restaurant. He clenched his eyes shut as the air whipped across his face, pressing his skin into the bones. 

" Hey, wait!" Zayn heard someone behind them but Louis didn't stop not even slowing down. It was a mystery to Zayn how his boyfriend was able to run so fast even with him on his back but in that moment he wasn't really in a state to question that.

" Lou!" He yelled when he started feeling that he was airborne.

" Zaynie, is someone following us still?" Zayn looked back carefully to see the man in the distance who had slowed down eventually stopping completely.

" No, but he can still see us." Zayn's words came out rushed but muffled but the air that crashed against them.

" Just a little more than, Zaynie. Hold on." Louis stated before increasing his speed and taking a harsh turn. Eventually, they were safe enough for Zayn to be let down.

" Why'd you do that?" Zayn said swaying around his arms stretched in front of him as an awkward attempt to balance himself.

" My mum once told me that she would give anything to get a membership card for that restaurant but they only gave them to the people who order really big," Louis explained between deep puffs of breath, one of his hand was pressed to his chest while the other one was wrapped around Zayn's shoulder keeping the boy upright.

" Well, where's the coupon?" Zayn asked blinking his eyes to get out of the haze. 

Gasping, Louis stated " Shit! I was so nervous I literally forgot about it." Zayn couldn't help but laugh at that Louis joining him too. " Well, you're laughing so it isn't all a losing situation." That only made the younger boyfriends laugh harder.

" Only you, Lou. Only you." He let out in between residual giggles leaning in to peck his boyfriend lightly. Louis rolled his eyes at the comment, his smile betraying his irritated stance.

" Come on, let's take you home now." Louis wrapped his arms around him, letting one of it slide to his butt. Zayn yelped at the peculiar contact, his eyes wide and cheeks red. " What? " Louis mocked innocence, earning a tight slap across his chest. " I just want you to hop on." And another one on his face. " Okay, that came out wrong. I mean I want you to get on me." He tried to rephrase it earning another slap on his face. " Sorry! I'll say it again you know how the koalas are on the trees? I want to carry you like that. I think that was fine." He chuckled at the end of it.

" Yeah," Zayn let out a giggle of his own, his heart erratic as he jumped up clasping his legs around Louis' waist and his arms around his neck. Louis settled both of his hands under his hips bouncing him a little, making the blush on his cheeks even darker.

" Okay back to home!" He marched his way back to the main street changing his course a little from the way they had come. " It's a shortcut, keep your head down you'll get dizzy," Louis explained as Zayn started looking around to get a better view.

" Okay." He let out softly before fixing his head in the crook of his boyfriend's neck.

As the steps went on soft and careful, Zayn started getting sleepier, his eyelids heavy and body loose. After a few minutes, Louis started humming and that was the only thing Zayn had needed before he let himself surrender to slumber.

Louis smiled as he felt his boyfriend's body slumping in his embrace, turning his head to kiss the head that dangled on his shoulder. He strengthened his grasp around his boyfriend before quickening his pace. In the distance, he saw a dark figure waving at him.

" Louis! You're late!" Hugh yelled at him, successfully waking Leaking Zayn up. The younger lad struggled, unaware of his surroundings, blinking his eyes rapidly trying to get the sleep out of them.

" And you woke him up," Louis yelled back at him, his tone held playful annoyance. " Zaynie, stop moving." 

" Hunh?" Came the distraught reply. 

" Almost there now babe," Louis bounced him a little in an attempt to keep him from moving.

" Why is he sleeping?" Hugh asked Louis when they stood right next to each other.

" He is not. And what sort of question is that? Why do you sleep?" Louis gave him an incredulous look.

" Well, I don't sleep on dates." Hugh scoffed, opening the rusty door and leading them inside.

" But we're home, date over," Zayn mumbled, adorably.

" And now you've ruined the surprise," Louis muttered, putting Zayn down on his feet. The amber eyes lad looked around with wide eyes, his sleep ridden mind unable to recognise their surroundings immediately.

" Lou? Not home?" His lips stuck out in a cute pout, confusion clear in his eyes. Louis chuckled tucking him under his shoulder close to his chest.

" We'll go home but we eat now. Guess where we are?" He led them towards the main site where the whole thing was planned out. Zayn rubbed his eyes with closed fists letting a yawn or two out.

" We're at the playground." He mumbled out nonchalantly, before comprehending his words letting his eyes widen at the surrounding. " We're at our playground!" He squealed earning a laugh from his older boyfriend.

The playground wasn't much different from all the times they had been there before but there was a table set up beside the swing with some formal cutlery on it. 

" Come on." Louis led him to the table sitting him down on his seat before pushing it in, his eyes shining with excitement. 

" So, I wanted to do something for you before I had to go and these idiots wanted to help. Don't worry they're gonna go soon." Zayn smiled at the animated gestures his boyfriend made, his heart swelling up with fondness. " So food by Olly, decor by penny, music by Ed and getting in the school premises after it closes part by Hugh, the sneaky bastard I told you about." He pointed towards them all as if he were the host of a well-known show making Zayn laugh out genuinely. " Ed music please." Ed nodded at him. 

Zayn almost squealed when he heard the first chords to ' let me love you' by no. 

' Much as you blame yourself for the way that you feel  
Had no example of a love that was even remotely real'  
Louis beamed at him from the other side of the table, presenting the various dishes to him, piling up his plate with every single thing claiming it was better than the last one. Zayn chewed onto his food, the smile on his face not even dropping for a second. Louis was just too cute for him to not smile at him. 

As he let his gaze roam he was reminded of the first time he had come to the place. A lot had happened that day, he had met Liam and discovered Louis' hideout. It was also the first time he had given Louis one of his drawings. The start of their new beginning.

" Lou, when was the last time I drew you something?" He asked while breaking his chicken into smaller pieces.

" I think before your exhibition. Why?" Louis replied with his mouthful.

" Why didn't you remind me?" Zayn almost scolded him, a slight frown on his forehead.

" Because you were busy and don't worry I'll pester you every for a drawing when you get rid of these exams." The corners of his mouth twitched up forming a beautiful smile. " Now are you done?" He wiped his hands on the napkin before dusting them off each other.

" Yeah," Zayn mumbled his actions.

" Time for the dessert then." Louis signalled Hugh who had been standing at the far corner with a huge bowl in his hands. Zayn's eyes sparked up in curiosity, his head tilting slightly.

" What is it?" He voiced out his thoughts as Hugh placed the bowl on the table gathering all the other plates and taking them away.

" Night Louis! Night Zed." He gave them a soft smile before turning back and going on his way. Everybody else had left already so it was really only the two of them left. 

"Let's sit on the ground." Louis stood up before taking the huge bowl with him and placing himself on the ground, Zayn following him. " This is my own creation and it might be gross but I don't think it's gross." He blabbered on before taking the lid off the bowl and looking at Zayn expectantly. " Tada! It's brownie chunks topped with chocolate chip ice cream and mnm's."

Zayn laughed at the excitement in Louis' voice quickly taking a spoon from Louis' hand and taking a big scoop of the desert.

" Hmm." He pulled his thinking face on. " Too much salt." He tried to copy Gordon Ramsay making Louis laugh out.

" Seriously, though, I think you're the first person I'm sharing this recipe with. What do you think about it?" Louis took a huge spoonful of it in his mouth, wiping it out clean.

" I think you are a genius," Zayn stated before taking the bowl in his lap and wrapping his lanky arms around it. " And since you know how to make this, you can make yourself a new one."

" Hey!" Louis whined, crossing his arms over his chest. " It's date day, you can't take this away from me!"

" but I'm your boyfriend what's yours is mine." Zayn licked the back of his spoon before sticking it in the yummy goo again.

" Yeah I think." Louis slumped in his position giving up on the heavenly desert. " At least don't eat it In front of me then. I wanna go for a swing anyway."

" But.. my cococreamnm " Zayn whined putting the lid on the desert and hugging it close to his chest.

" Cococreamnm? Why didn't I think of that?" Louis chuckled before crawling towards Zayn and carefully taking the bowl away from him (not without a little whining.)

" Now we swing." Louis stood up pulling Zayn along with him. He sat himself down on the swing and settled Zayn on his lap.

" But it'll break!" Zayn shrieked trying to get off but Louis pulled him back into his lap.

" No, it won't. Let's just swing. The weather is beautiful today." He sighed letting his head fall into the younger lads neck paddling his feet to move the swing. Clearly, he spoke too soon because as they felt the first gush of wind against their face the drops started, eventually turning into buckets full of water leaving them completely drenched.

" Yeah right! I told you it was going to rain but you wouldn't listen! Now this swing is going to break too but you won't listen then too!" Zayn ranted on but Louis didn't say anything only looking at him with a fondness in his eyes.

" Damn it!" He whispered still in the state of fondness.

" What you've said it twice now! Why do you keep saying that!?" Zayn all but yelled.

" I love you!" And that managed to shut him up.  
But not for long.

" Damn it then too. Cause I love you too!" He blurted out before smashing his lips against his boyfriend's lips.  
He truly did love Louis and maybe that was why his mind didn't wander to the fact that Louis had told him he was leaving not even mentioning about a return.

+  
Cococreamnm, anyone?   
So my exam went well ( I suppose) and everything else is awesome too.  
Roza? I still got two hours before iftar.  
Anyways does this make up for what I did in the previous chapter? ( it was necessary.) Also I wanted this to be the fluffiest thing ever so that.  
Comment.Preach.Kudos.


	33. ۳۱

" What's going on in that head of yours?" He averted his gaze from the window to his older brother. Harry was frowning at him, so Zayn gave him a smile.

 

" Nothing." His voice came out as a mere whisper.

" Don't give me that. I can almost see it." Harry placed a finger on his forehead and tapped it slightly. " Your mind working."

Zayn just shrugged at that, his head hanging low.

To be honest, he wasn't exactly sure what he felt. In fact, he was at a war within himself. The deep portal in his heart had opened up again, sucking up the very soul out of him.

Exams were over and he hadn't seen Louis since that last date day. When he thought about that day, an intense feeling of restlessness settled itself under his skin. Why hadn't he asked Louis about it? Why had he let it slide? Why did he have to be so slow? If he would've processed Louis' words sooner then maybe he wouldn't have been sitting in his room sulking like that.

He heaved a sigh and shook his head.

" It's... it's nothing, Haz." It seemed as if he was trying to convince himself more than anything else.

Zayn wasn't even sure about what Louis had meant when he said he was leaving. Was he leaving him? Or was he leaving the city? Or was he- . There were just too many possibilities to think of but Zayn's mind couldn't even handle even a few of them. Whenever he thought about Louis these days, his heart would start spiralling down and the negative part of his brain went haywire, while the positive side tried to keep up the balance. Eventually, it'd get too much for him and then he'd break. He'd cry for hours after that, not really sure about the reason behind it ( that only made him cry harder.) His head would start screaming in pain, eyes swelling up, body loose and soon he'd be too exhausted to care.   
When he'd wake up the following day he would convince himself that he was just being his usual self and he'd scold himself for letting the demons get to him. But then again his thoughts would wander back to it and hence starting the cycle again. It was pathetic, he knew but that's just what he was without Louis.

" Where's lover boy?" Harry's voice was heavy with concern.

Zayn shrugged letting himself smile at the nickname that his brother had chosen for his boyfriend.

" Why do you call him that?" He asked. Harry walked closer to him, the corner of his lips tugging up to form a smile of his own.

" Cause that's what he is." Zayn's smile faltered, the voice at the back of his head reminding him of the reason they were actually having that talk.

" I don't know." He swallowed the lump in his throat, blinking his eyes to keep them from watering.

" What do you mean?" Harry's eyebrows knit together in confusion. Zayn fiddled with his fingers letting his gaze slip down to the floor.

" I don't know." He stated again, more firmly this time. Harry took a seat beside him on the bed, his worried gaze never once shifting from the younger boy's face.

" Well, call him." He said rather nonchalantly.

Zayn sniffled, his gaze still fixated to the floor. Had he tried calling Louis? He did not think so.

" But he always calls me." He mumbled justifying his actions to himself.

" So? Does that mean you can't call him?" Hardy brought his legs to his chest crossing them together.  
Zayn contemplated his brother's words for a second, unsure of what he should say. Why hadn't he called Louis?

" He said he was leaving?" And there was his reason in the form of an uncertain question. As his mouth formed the words the sane part of his mind realised that he had been caught up in that too think about anything else.

" Yeah, for college." His head jerked up so that he could look directly at his brother. Why hadn't that came to his mind when he was struggling with the what ifs and was hes ? 

' Because Louis never mentioned anything about college '

His conscience reasoned.

" But he never said anything about it." He voiced out, withdrawn.

" Zee, you're thinking too much." Harry comforted him by placing his hand on his shoulder.

' If he is leaving for college then he is going to leave you behind too.'

Again came the dark voice.

" He's gonna leave me, Haz." He blurted out.

" What?!" Harry gave him a questioning look.

" I mean why would he want to be stuck with a freshman. He's already into college and he's going to want to have new experiences. Maybe I'm not a part of his new plan. Why would I be?" And soon his thoughts were pouring out of his lips. " God, why would he want to be with me, anyway." His hands covered his face, rubbing against his cheeks frantically.

" Zayn." Harry pulled them away from his face, taking them into his paler ones. " Listen to me." He caressed the back of them trying to soothe his brother but Zayn was having none of that.

" No, it's fine. He deserves better. He deserves a l.." Harry took him by the shoulders, shaking him hard.

" Shut up!" He all but yelled, his green eyes shining in determination. " You are not justifying something wrong with your odd logic and he is not leaving you."

" Haz," Zayn whined, clearly at the verge of an emotional breakdown.

" No!" Harry closed his eyes, shaking his head firmly. " He's lover boy, Zee. He won't leave you. Okay?"   
Zayn sighed at that letting his eyes shut before nodding half-hearted. " Okay." He repeated trying to conserve it in his head.

" Now, Liam is waiting for you downstairs. He said he brought you need for speed." He stood up and pulled Zayn to his feet.

" Most wanted?" Zayn mumbled.

" Most wanted," he confirmed, smiling.

+

Harry was a good brother. He had heard it a few times before from his mum, his friends, Liam, Louis and Zayn himself. So him going over to Louis' place was the most logical thing to do. ( Not the most predictable but the most logical.)

As he k locked the door to the double storied house, a Deep feeling of nostalgia crashed him. While waiting, he looked around the place an involuntary smirk gracing his lips. The last time he remembered visiting this place was when he and Niall had planted the doll prank, while Zayn had sat in the car two houses away. 

Thinking about that pulled a sigh out of him. It felt as if it had all Benn a lifetime ago when in reality it had been only a few months. A year ago if someone told Harry that there would a come a day where he'd be standing outside the Tomlinson residence waiting for Louis to turn up so they could actually talk, he would've probably smacked the shit out of that person. But things had changed a lot in the past year. Harry and Louis had finally come to terms with each other and not that he would ever admit but underneath all the façade of mischievous and irritating Louis was a genuinely decent person.

" Yes?" The door opened revealing a short blonde lady.

" Is To.." Harry cleared his throat before starting again. " Is Louis home?" Nervousness creeping out of his words.

" Wait a minute," she ducked inside the door and called out. " Louis! There's someone here to see you." She then turned towards Harry. " He'll be down soon."

Harry nodded, lacing his fingers together and placing his joined hands on the small of his back.

 

" Zayn!" Louis jumped out, a bright smile on his face. Harry almost laughed when the smile faltered as he spotted him.

" Hi, Tommo." He pressed his lips together, as Louis looked behind him, disappointment clear in his eyes.

" Where's Zee?" He asked letting a huge frown take over his forehead.

" At home." Harry let out.

" Oh." Louis huffed before asking. " Is he mad at me?"

" No." Harry shakes his head, emphasising his answer.

" Then..why?" Again Louis looked behind Harry as if he was hoping that the raven haired lad would be standing there waiting to surprise him.

" Why didn't you call him?" Harry questioned, reminding himself why he was here in the first place.

" What?" Louis tilted his head questioningly.

" Why didn't you call Zayn?" Harry repeated, saying it a little slower this time.

" I didn't want to disturb him during exams," Louis said, warily.

" Exams are over," Harry stated in a business like tone.

" Are they? Then why didn't he come over?" The cerulean eyed lad resembled a lost puppy.

Harry sighed understanding the situation all too well. 

' Idiots' he thought.

" You're leaving?" He asked instead if voicing out his thoughts.

" Yeah for college aren't you?" Louis squints his eyes, clearly confused about the whole thing.

" I am but Zayn thinks you're leaving him." Harry coughed. He almost sighed when realisation flashed in Louis' eyes and he let his head down his gaze directed to the floor.

" Oh." He let out.

" Louis even if you're thinking about it because of all the Kong distance crap please don't. You just got together and he needs you. He needs you to make him feel special. And also you make him smile and he's himself around you and as selfish as it must sound I don't want to lose Zayn and so I don't want you to leave him." Harry finished, unsure of what he was going to do after that.

" I love him!" And that wasn't exactly what Harry had expected to hear. " I do and you're right, it's hard. He's just getting started with high school and he can have so much better than a college guy who can't come to his house whenever he wants too and he doesn't have to be stuck in a long distance relationship. But if you are selfish then I am selfish too. I don't care!" Louis passed a harsh hand through his feathery locks, frustration clear in his movements. " Hell I love him so much I can't even do it if I want to. I can't ever break up with him. And if that's selfish then I love selfish." Exasperated, he sighed .

" So you won't break up with him?" Is the only question that Harry could come up with.

" Never." Look shook his head, firmly.

" Thank God." And impulsive as ever, Harry jumped up to give Louis a bro hug. The older lad only chuckled.

" You know I hate to say it but I think I don't not like you anymore." His tone was genuine.

" Me neither." Harry agreed.  
And come to think of it, that was all Zayn ever wanted.

+

Zayn had decided that he would talk to Louis when he had been in bed the previous night. He decided that he would go up to the older lad and ask him all about college and if he wanted to leave Zayn and if they could still stay friends after that.

When he woke up in the morning, He had carefully placed his latest drawing for Louis in his file. It was of them on their latest date day with the rain pouring over their heads their lips locked into a seemingly passionate kiss. Zayn wasn't sure how suitable the drawing was, now that they were most likely going to break up but he had made it for Louis so he would give it to him.

When he entered the school, it was eerily quiet. Was he too early? Confused, he walked towards his locker looking around to see only a couple of people around him all looking at him. Maybe he was being paranoid again. Quickly, he opened his locker, gasping as something fell out of it. 

" Just a note." He reassured himself, rubbing his chest with his right hand. Carefully, he bent down and picked the yellow piece of sticky note reading it.

' Up on the roof - Lou xx'

It said. 

Zayn's eyebrows knit together in confusion. What was Louis doing upstairs? Shrugging he just made his way upstairs getting his drawing out of the file. When he reached the first step he almost screamed at the guy who stood there with a single rose in his hand. Startled, he blinked at him waiting for him to say something but he just smiled at him before presenting the rose to him.

"Excuse me?" Zayn's voice came out meek.

" From Louis." The boy said, thrusting the flower in his hand, the smile still bright on his face. Zayn gave him a quizzical look before proceeding to step up the stairs only to be greeted by a new boy at every step with a new red rose. With every flower Zayn's confidence boosted and his heart pumped faster, fluttering at the thought of Louis. When he got to the last step, he was sure he was going to throw up his heart with how close it felt to his throat.

" Zayn!" He heard someone call him but it wasn't Louis. Robotically, he moved towards the source of the voice which lead him right near the edge of the roof. " Down here!" They said again and Zayn shifted his gaze down to spot them. The sight that greeted him wasn't exactly the one he was ready for. There in the driveway of the school stood almost the entire population of the Bradford High. All of them had a weird object in their hands which was raised up above their heads and they were standing in a weird pattern. Still confused, Zayn frowned at the whole thing, trying to look for his boyfriend in the crowd but he didn't have to do it for long. A gasp escaped him when he felt those familiar arms wrap around his waist from the back.

" Here," Louis mumbled right in his ear, causing sweet shivers to run down his spine. Jerkily, Zayn turned in his arms so that he could look at him directly.

" Louis." The smile on his lips was an involuntary act. Louis spotted the drawing in his hand carefully taking it from him. Zayn swallowed hard as the cerulean eyed inspected the piece of paper rather seriously.

" But I wanted to do something cute for you this time." Louis pouted causing Zayn to giggle. " This is so perfect. How do I compete with this now?"

" Louis!" Chorused a lot of voices.

" Yeah, Zee looks up now." Louis turned him back around placing his chin over his head. " Okay, guys 1 2 3."

Zayn flinched as the first fire cracker went on and then the second and then the third and son. At first, he didn't know what the point of it was but then his eyes focused on the sky in the distance and his heart stopped completely.

"Be my boyfriend." Was written in loopy black firework residue.

Zayn shrieked jumping up and down making Louis laugh whole hearted.  
" Told you I'd ask you out, my way." Louis turned him around pulling him closer to himself, throwing the flowers away from his grasp. Zayn backed a little, a playful smirk settling on his lips.

" What's in it for me?" He asked, mocking seriousness. Louis raised one of his eyebrows at him.

"What?" He chuckled pulling him closer again but Zayn turned his head to the other side.

" What will I get if I agree?" He tucked his lower lips under his teeth. Louis' eyes sparkled with emotions.

" I'll give you my heart." He stated before closing the gap between them and this time, Zayn let him.

+

Last chapter before the epilogue my babies. I've had this in my head for so long I still can't believe it's out there now. I think I'm dying.   
So wattpad wouldn't allow comments on my last update and it made me sad af but I'm fine now.   
Do u want it to end?  
Vote.preach.Comment


	34. ∞

Zayn counted the seconds in his head, his eyes fixed on his brother who was sitting across from him, Harry was smiling, his green eyes shining with excitement. Zayn was smiling too, his lower lip tucked under his teeth.

7.......

6......

5.....

4....

3...

2..

1.

" Happy birthday, Haz." As those words left his lips, a sudden sense of deja vu washed over him.

" Happy birthday, Zee." Harry took his smaller hand into his paler one, squeezing it lightly.

" Make a wish, Haz." Zayn closed his eyes and wished. He wished that things would never change.

He opened his eyes and saw Harry clutching his hands together and whispering feverishly. An involuntary laugh escaped his lips, alerting Harry who shook his head at him and continued his wishing session. Zayn chuckled and then place a finger on his lips shushing himself. That made Harry laugh but still he pretended he didn't laugh and started whispering again. Zayn looked fondly at his older brother, as he nodded his head signalling the end of the wish

Slowly, they leaned over to the cupcake that sat between them and blew the two candles on it. Zayn giggled as his forehead collided with Harry's nose, making the older lad groan out in pain.

Then Harry picked up the cupcake feeding it to Zayn before handing it to him.

" And don't smash it on my face this time," Harry warned. Zayn chuckled at the memory before feeding the cupcake to Harry.

" Hi!" Both the brothers shifted their gaze to the source of the voice. Zayn's heart stopped for a minute as he saw a dark figure standing right beside his window. A scream bubbled itself in his throat escaping out of his lips even before he could process it.

Louis screamed completely startled.

"Oh My God, Zee! You scared the shit out of me!" His voice came out shrill. Zayn chuckled at his jumpy state before getting off the bed and walking over to him.

" You scared the shit out of me, Lou." He wrapped his arms around his neck leaning in to peck him softly on the lips.

Harry groaned from his position on the bed.

" Zee, What did I tell you about PDA?" He whined, shaking his head in annoyance.

" Happy birthday, Zaynie." Louis completely ignored Harry and kissed Zayn again, earning an adorable giggle from his boyfriend.

" Can you no.." Harry's whining session was interrupted by the rapid knock on the door. Zayn jumped his eyes clenching shut. Panic burned his throat as he was reminded of the incident that had happened last year.

Harry jumped off his bed opening the door, only to be greeted by a party popper bursting straight in his face.

" Fuck!" He shrieked.

Zayn eased his eyes open to look at Niall and Liam standing at the door, Harry stood across them completely covered in confetti. He sighed letting the panic dissipate off of him.

He still got scared sometimes but then he reminded himself that things had changed. It had been a year. A year since he had been back, a year since Harry had saved him and a year since he had last seen his father. Life for Zayn had changed a lot in that year. He could eat properly now without having to force it down his throat. He woke up every day and Harry was there to pester the hell out of him. ( The older lad had taken a gap year.) His mum was there too, expecting kisses and cuddles out of him. Zayn had a lot of friends now but Liam was still on the top of the list. And how could he forget about Louis? His boyfriend had decided to stay, stating that he couldn't focus on anything but ways that he would sneak out to see Zayn. So what was the point of moving away, when his heart was in Bradford with Zayn.

" Surprise!" Liam jumped his eyes dancing in happiness.

" Happy Birthday, Zayn, Haz and I'm sorry." Niall laughed at his best friend's state. Louis let out a chuckle of his own and walked towards them, pulling Zayn with him.

" That was genius!" He exclaimed raising his hand to high-five Niall.

" No, It was stupid." Harry groaned shaking his head to get the paper out of his hair. Liam walked over to him helping him get rid of the confetti.

" Oh! Happy Birthday, Zee!" Zayn giggled as his best friend jumped over to him, hugging him tightly.

" Hey, it's my birthday too," Harry whined, pulling him back.

" Not for a month, no," Liam stated.

" But we're celebrating it today." Liam shook his head, a gasp escaping him as Harry pulled him dangerously close to himself.

" Hey! I thought we were going to watch a movie or something." Niall pouted. Liam placed a hand on Harry's chest and pushed him a little, earning a desperate whine from his boyfriend.

" We are. Zaynie I got all your favourite movies and your mum said we could go all night long. She's so cool, by the way." He walked over to his best friend, taking the duffle bag of his shoulder and shoving it into his hand.

" Does it have 'need for speed' in it?" Zayn gushed while going through the bag. Liam only nodded letting himself smile at the enthusiasm in his voice. " And...And '21st jump street'?" His eyes were sparkling.

Liam nodded again.

" Hey, Liam. I have to show something to Zaynie. Why don't you set up everything and we'll be back in twenty?" Louis asked. Liam's smile changed into a confused expression but nonetheless he nodded. Zayn frowned at Louis, his eyes wide in confusion.

" Where are we going?" He asked, tilting his head slightly. Louis beamed at him taking his hand in his own and rushing him out of the door.

" We got to be fast. We don't have much time." They hurried past the steps and out of the door to Louis' car. Zayn was giggling the entire time not stopping even when they were buckled up in the car.

" Lou, where are we going?" He asked again but Louis just shook his head while starting the car. " But Lou!" He grumbled, a pout forming on his lips.

" No, Zaynie. You just gotta wait for a little." Louis looked into the rearview mirror before reversing the car out of his parking spot.

" Please, Lou." Zayn stuck out his lip, mock sniffling.

" Zaynie, No! Don't give me that now. You know I will cave!" Zayn ignored him completely, continuing his pouting session, his eyebrows high up on his forehead. " I'm just not gonna look at you then." And he did that for the entire drive.

When the car stopped, Zayn looked at the apartment building that stood in front of them. He tipped his head backwards trying to get the complete view of the tall building. He was so lost in it that he didn't even account for Louis getting out of the car until the door to his side was being opened and his boyfriend was standing there.

" Come on." Louis urged him, his hand stretched out for him to take. Zayn placed his hand onto Louis' larger one, promptly getting out of the car.

Together they walked towards the building, their hands entwined, steps rhythmic and firm. Zayn just trusted Louis and kept walking, clearly unknown to his surroundings.

They walked into the elevator and Louis started saying. " So, you know how you really really love drawing and I really really love you." He wiggled his eyebrows, placing his hands on Zayn's hips, the shorter boy only smiling, shyly. " And It's your birthday and as your boyfriend, I should give you the best give ever." He beamed, kissing Zayn's forehead. " You know how you always say that sometimes you just need some space to just do your things and draw or paint or whatever." The elevator stopped. Louis pulled his arms away from Zayn only to place one of them on his shoulder. " So," He dragged the word and they stepped out. " I might've bought you a tiny little place that you could call your art studio."

Those words were enough for Zayn to halt completely into his step. " You what?!" He squealed, jumping a little in the buzz of excitement.

" Hey, don't be too loud. It's late and people might be asleep." Louis reprimanded. Zayn jumped into his arms, giggling like crazy. " Zaynie, You haven't even seen it yet." Louis chuckled before leading them to the apartment that he had bought for his boyfriend. Zayn had his eyes closed the entire time, a goofy smile on his face. " And that's it. TADA!" Louis opened the door, turning the lights on. Zayn jumped off of him an unexpected gasp escaping his lips.

His heart threatened to break out of his chest as he looked around the room. It was perfect, small and comfortable. The floor was bare with only a canvas sitting in the middle and a couch beside the right wall. The walls were a deep shade of purple with sketches lining them. As Zayn walked closer he discovered that the sketches were the one that he had given to Louis over the last year. Fondness pooled at the bottom of his stomach as he looked over the drawings from the first one to the last, the smile on his face threatened to break it into two. On the front wall, there was a silver 'ZAYN' engraved into the wall their playground date day sketch placed under it.

" So, how do you like it?" Louis asked him expectantly. Zayn gave him a thoughtful look before tapping the drawing and shaking his head.

" This shouldn't be here you know." He said.

" But I love that one." Louis frowned at him. Zayn nodded at his words, his lips pressed into a thin line.

" I know but this is an important spot and I think I'll put your elf drawing here. And you know what I'll write under it? 'This is an elf in case you don't have time to stalk Santa Claus'." He suppressed a smile as Louis dropped his head, groaning loudly.

" I am never gonna live that one down, Am I?" He shrugged and Zayn nodded before bursting out laughing.

" It's perfect you know." He said moving closer to his boyfriend.

" Like you." Zayn giggled before moving in to kiss him.

It had been a year since everything had changed but he still couldn't believe what he got out from that.

Louis' heart.

A/N

It's inevitable everything that's good comes to an end  
It's impossible to know if after this we can still be friends, yeah

So, I guess this is the end. *cries* I can't believe that this book is going to be marked completed from now on and I'm really proud of myself but I'm kinda sad to let this go.

I want to thank all of you who commented, voted and read this story because you guys are the only reason I made it this far and I just love you all. 

I want all of you to tell me what this story did to you, even the ghost readers. I just want to know what it meant to you. 

This story means so much to me and I can't help but remember when I started writing it. I was so so deep in depression and this was the only thing that kept me afloat. This is my reason and I just can't believe I'm done with it. Am I crying? I am crying.

I love every single one of you and I mean it. If it were up to me we'd all be on first name bases even though I am the most socially awkward person ever. 

Goodbye I guess.

Love, Sara.

**Author's Note:**

> leave feedback


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